Anonymous
Post 03/19/2018 12:14     Subject: Read Hillbilly Elegy, reading Evicted
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Sure, having only one child would be ideal.

But the way our lawmakers are going, family planning and abortion clinics will not be available anymore. They are hard enough to access in some communities as is.

That is just problem #1 to tackle for those born to this circumstance.


Having one child AFTER high school graduation (or vocational school or college) once you have a job and are stably coupled would be ideal. Honestly, delaying childbearing until 30 would be best.

Abstinence only campaigns failed (there were studies), but I wonder if a slick media campaign about how fun it is to be single in the city in your 20s might work? Images of people working in offices, happy hours, international travel, etc.

Honestly, they should hold up Beyoncé and Jay-Z and Kim Kardashian and Kanye. Didn't they delay childbearing until 30? Too bad they didn't marry beforehand, but at least they waited and eventually got married.



Beyoncé and Jay-Z did wait till after they were married to have children.
Anonymous
Post 03/19/2018 10:08     Subject: Read Hillbilly Elegy, reading Evicted
And furthermore, regardless of it being misguided, when you have nothing the thought of just one person loving you unconditionally is a strong motivator for adolescents and even young adults who feel hopeless.
Anonymous
Post 03/19/2018 09:58     Subject: Read Hillbilly Elegy, reading Evicted
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Sure, having only one child would be ideal.

But the way our lawmakers are going, family planning and abortion clinics will not be available anymore. They are hard enough to access in some communities as is.

That is just problem #1 to tackle for those born to this circumstance.


Having one child AFTER high school graduation (or vocational school or college) once you have a job and are stably coupled would be ideal. Honestly, delaying childbearing until 30 would be best.

Abstinence only campaigns failed (there were studies), but I wonder if a slick media campaign about how fun it is to be single in the city in your 20s might work? Images of people working in offices, happy hours, international travel, etc.

Honestly, they should hold up Beyoncé and Jay-Z and Kim Kardashian and Kanye. Didn't they delay childbearing until 30? Too bad they didn't marry beforehand, but at least they waited and eventually got married.

The people who are having kids early are doing so, in part, because they know full well that their 20s are not going to be fun and carefree. They don't have well-paying, white-collar jobs. They aren't going to fancy happy hours and taking weekend trips to Paris. Well-off, educated people delay having kids because there is a reason for them to do so. Poor people aren't going to have that carefree lifestyle even if they delay childbearing.
Anonymous
Post 03/19/2018 05:04     Subject: Read Hillbilly Elegy, reading Evicted
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I grew up working class (we received food stamps for a couple years, my mom cleaned houses between clerical jobs).

I made it to college and later grad school. I'm a fed and I've lived abroad.

The difference I think is being surrounded by people for whom not going to college is not an option. Unfortunately lower wage earners are often not savvy enough to know about all the scholarships, financial aid, etc.

Even with financial aid, someone still needs to have a little bit of money in the bank to pay rent when the financial aid check hasn't arrived.

It's expensive to be poor, no doubt about it.


+1, my husband didn't have anyone to tell him how to apply to college. No one at school took an interest in him, his mom never went and simply anyone who could have, like relatives didn't. He saw his only option of survival as military, which is a good option but its not easy while in to get a degree as many claim when you are just trying to survive.

I grew up lower-middle class but we lived in an extremely affluent public school district where everyone around me was going to college and I think that made all the difference in the world.

Also wanted to add that it was my amazing high school guidance counselor who helped me and suggested the McNair scholar program (https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ronald_E._McNair_Post-Baccalaureate_Achievement_Program). Once I got to college I had another excellent mentor through that program who guided me through my four years and helped me prepare for a PhD program. I probably wouldn’t have graduated from college without this incredible program, let alone gone on to graduate school. (I hold a PhD in pharmacolog.). But of course, the McNair Scholars program is on the chopping block with this administration

I don’t have the link but I remember reading that if there’s just ONE adult in a child’s life that pushes them and mentors them, their likelihood of success increases significantly.
Anonymous
Post 03/19/2018 04:57     Subject: Read Hillbilly Elegy, reading Evicted
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I grew up working class (we received food stamps for a couple years, my mom cleaned houses between clerical jobs).

I made it to college and later grad school. I'm a fed and I've lived abroad.

The difference I think is being surrounded by people for whom not going to college is not an option. Unfortunately lower wage earners are often not savvy enough to know about all the scholarships, financial aid, etc.

Even with financial aid, someone still needs to have a little bit of money in the bank to pay rent when the financial aid check hasn't arrived.

It's expensive to be poor, no doubt about it.


+1, my husband didn't have anyone to tell him how to apply to college. No one at school took an interest in him, his mom never went and simply anyone who could have, like relatives didn't. He saw his only option of survival as military, which is a good option but its not easy while in to get a degree as many claim when you are just trying to survive.

I grew up lower-middle class but we lived in an extremely affluent public school district where everyone around me was going to college and I think that made all the difference in the world.
Anonymous
Post 03/19/2018 04:30     Subject: Re:Read Hillbilly Elegy, reading Evicted
Anonymous wrote: Who knows why some people succeed and some fail. I too grew up dirt poor. The type of poor where we drank only powdered milk and never had anything that was not a casserole for dinner. I thought rich people could get single pieces of meat like a chicken leg or something for dinner. All of my siblings and I are college educated thanks to student loans. 100%. The only difference is probably my parents raised us with the expectation that we would to go to college. There was not an option. Even though we did not know how college was going to be paid for or how it was going to be accomplished, it was still an expectation. My parents didn’t even know a lot about student loans. We had to figure it out on our own.


Your parents expectations are probably what made all the difference. There's a culture of poverty and even a culture of disability in which parents don't expect their kids to succeed and play no role in their academic lives. I've actually heard parents say "you're an adult now, get your own food stamps." It's hard to get out of that trap.

But I also know a couple of people who grew up in poverty with parents who did not give a sh"t about their kids, and they have advanced degrees and are successful. I can't explain that.
Anonymous
Post 03/19/2018 02:30     Subject: Re:Read Hillbilly Elegy, reading Evicted
Anonymous wrote:
To the pp who commented on child care embedded in the quote:

There's a difference between having kids without a partner and without a high school degree beginning in the 10th grade (which is oftentimes the case for female heads of households in poverty and subsidized housing) and those who delay childbearing until they've married and have jobs. Your DCUM struggle with childcare costs isn't the same as those living in poverty.

Some people stop at one child. Others delay having a second until the first starts kindergarten. These are strategies of responsible adults.

But a 10th grader isn't an adult. Your tone comes across as if you are blaming the kids who have children young (maybe you're not)...but it neglects the fact that they are basically given misinformation about their reproductive systems in school and pretty much no recourse if they do something irresponsible in a moment of passion (pretty much the definition of being a teenager). Around the world, access to reproductive and women's health is the key to pulling people out of poverty...yet we have completely backward education policies in our country that keep this basic information away from our kids.
Anonymous
Post 03/19/2018 01:36     Subject: Read Hillbilly Elegy, reading Evicted
Anonymous wrote:I grew up working class (we received food stamps for a couple years, my mom cleaned houses between clerical jobs).

I made it to college and later grad school. I'm a fed and I've lived abroad.

The difference I think is being surrounded by people for whom not going to college is not an option. Unfortunately lower wage earners are often not savvy enough to know about all the scholarships, financial aid, etc.

Even with financial aid, someone still needs to have a little bit of money in the bank to pay rent when the financial aid check hasn't arrived.

It's expensive to be poor, no doubt about it.


+1, my husband didn't have anyone to tell him how to apply to college. No one at school took an interest in him, his mom never went and simply anyone who could have, like relatives didn't. He saw his only option of survival as military, which is a good option but its not easy while in to get a degree as many claim when you are just trying to survive.
Anonymous
Post 03/19/2018 01:16     Subject: Read Hillbilly Elegy, reading Evicted
I grew up working class (we received food stamps for a couple years, my mom cleaned houses between clerical jobs).

I made it to college and later grad school. I'm a fed and I've lived abroad.

The difference I think is being surrounded by people for whom not going to college is not an option. Unfortunately lower wage earners are often not savvy enough to know about all the scholarships, financial aid, etc.

Even with financial aid, someone still needs to have a little bit of money in the bank to pay rent when the financial aid check hasn't arrived.

It's expensive to be poor, no doubt about it.
Anonymous
Post 03/18/2018 09:47     Subject: Read Hillbilly Elegy, reading Evicted
Anonymous wrote:Sure, having only one child would be ideal.

But the way our lawmakers are going, family planning and abortion clinics will not be available anymore. They are hard enough to access in some communities as is.

That is just problem #1 to tackle for those born to this circumstance.


Having one child AFTER high school graduation (or vocational school or college) once you have a job and are stably coupled would be ideal. Honestly, delaying childbearing until 30 would be best.

Abstinence only campaigns failed (there were studies), but I wonder if a slick media campaign about how fun it is to be single in the city in your 20s might work? Images of people working in offices, happy hours, international travel, etc.

Honestly, they should hold up Beyoncé and Jay-Z and Kim Kardashian and Kanye. Didn't they delay childbearing until 30? Too bad they didn't marry beforehand, but at least they waited and eventually got married.
Anonymous
Post 03/18/2018 09:35     Subject: Read Hillbilly Elegy, reading Evicted
Anonymous wrote:"The bestselling author of "Hillbilly Elegy" has emerged as the liberal media's favorite white trash–splainer. But he is offering all the wrong lessons."

https://newrepublic.com/article/138717/jd-vance-false-prophet-blue-america


And yet, for some reason, he is a conservative. Which makes no sense to me.
Anonymous
Post 03/18/2018 09:04     Subject: Read Hillbilly Elegy, reading Evicted
"The bestselling author of "Hillbilly Elegy" has emerged as the liberal media's favorite white trash–splainer. But he is offering all the wrong lessons."

https://newrepublic.com/article/138717/jd-vance-false-prophet-blue-america
Anonymous
Post 03/18/2018 08:59     Subject: Read Hillbilly Elegy, reading Evicted
Sure, having only one child would be ideal.

But the way our lawmakers are going, family planning and abortion clinics will not be available anymore. They are hard enough to access in some communities as is.

That is just problem #1 to tackle for those born to this circumstance.
Anonymous
Post 03/17/2018 10:56     Subject: Read Hillbilly Elegy, reading Evicted
Anonymous wrote:I have this open right now, and think it should be read alongside Hillbilly Elegy: https://www.guernicamag.com/elizabeth-catte-appalachia-isnt-trump-country/


Thanks for passing this along. Its a really interesting, worthwhile read.
Anonymous
Post 03/17/2018 09:43     Subject: Re:Read Hillbilly Elegy, reading Evicted
I teach in a Title 1 school and see so many poor decisions being made by parents. So many of my students have a lot of siblings when their families can't afford them. It's sad that their moms end up pregnant every 2 years when they are already struggling. We have some moms who volunteer in our school who tell us that many of them moms can't afford to take care of their kids so they latch on to new men for financial help. They end up having more kids by them and then the men leave them. A lot of our students are half siblings and some of them don't even know it.