Anonymous
02/26/2018 17:41
Subject: Re:Bringing your older child to college when you still have several younger kids at home.
Well we are in the minority, because we took the two younger siblings when DS went to college. I couldn’t imagine not having included them and DS expected them to join us and help him move in and see where he’d be. It was a good experience for all of us and it was certainly still about him.
Anonymous
02/26/2018 13:53
Subject: Bringing your older child to college when you still have several younger kids at home.
Anonymous wrote:No. Also a family of 6 here. We've done 3 freshman drop offs so far; occasionally I'd see a family with a younger high school aged kid but never three extra kids. Here are the reasons we do not bring along the entire crew:
-we would not be able to fit six people + college kid's stuff in our vehicle (and we have a minivan). We needed that back seat folded into the floor to get everything in there, and my kids weren't even that heavy of packers. (Plus you'll have your own luggage if you're staying overnight).
-move-in day should be about the freshman. Maybe your kids are different but I could just hear the "Mooooom I'm sooooo boored" comments, fighting among kids in a 12x12 dorm room, etc. and I don't want that to "overshadow" what should be an exciting day for the freshman to be "sent off" to their new home.
-Dorm rooms are small. You'll have your freshman's roommate and his/her parent(s) there too. Having an extra three kids there, they'll just get in the way.
Just have them find a friend to stay with - you have ~6 months so it shouldn't be a problem. If you can't, just have one parent go.
Now, family weekend is when you tend to see entire families there. If your other kids want to see their oldest sibling's dorm room, just wait until then.
This. It's probably not the greatest first impression to have multiple kids in the dorm room when two families are attempting to move in at the same time. Make it about the freshman, not the others.
Anonymous
02/26/2018 13:50
Subject: Re:Bringing your older child to college when you still have several younger kids at home.
Everyone sees the kids off to college. Our two oldest kids went to college across the country. We hauled 8 people across the country (the grandparents wanted to see where they'd be) for move-in weekend freshman year.
My ex and I, our four kids, my husband, the kids grandfather and grandmother. I think there were four hotel rooms in total (the grandparents are not married to each other).
Because we were flying, we only flew with the college kid's clothes. Everything else was bought once we got there. So the freshman got the dorm room key, we all went to see, helped unpack the clothes, then made a list of things needed, like mini-fridge, toiletries, room decoration, office supplies. The freshman went to get room decor and school supplies, I went to get toiletries, Ex got mini-fridge and snacks, and the younger kids just went with whoever they felt like.
My ex and I, our four kids, my husband, the kids grandfather and grandmother. I think there were four hotel rooms in total (the grandparents are not married to each other).
Because we were flying, we only flew with the college kid's clothes. Everything else was bought once we got there. So the freshman got the dorm room key, we all went to see, helped unpack the clothes, then made a list of things needed, like mini-fridge, toiletries, room decoration, office supplies. The freshman went to get room decor and school supplies, I went to get toiletries, Ex got mini-fridge and snacks, and the younger kids just went with whoever they felt like.
Anonymous
02/26/2018 13:44
Subject: Bringing your older child to college when you still have several younger kids at home.
If you trust the 14 and 16 year old to stay home, just find a sleepover for the 12 year old. I'm sure one of his/her friend's families would be happy to help you out.
Anonymous
02/26/2018 09:08
Subject: Bringing your older child to college when you still have several younger kids at home.
Anonymous wrote:OP back again, thanks for the additional responses.
The younger kids aren't very young--they will be 12, 14, and 16 this summer. The 16 year old could stay by himself, and probably even the 14 year old with him...it's the 12 year old I'm worried about.
I'm thinking you all are right about it not needing to be a 2 night event also. I like what 22:31 said "I'd probably go up the night before, have a nice dinner with your college student, move her in, maybe get lunch together, then head home. " and that is probably what we will do
Thanks again everyone, for the perspective!
Are you friends with the parents of any of your oldest's friends? As far as I can tell, there was a lot of trading off with families who also had kids leaving for college, because move-in days are sufficiently staggered that not everyone goes the same weekend. So one family would host a sleepover or go stay with the younger kids, and then the next weekend the parents who had done dropoff would watch someone else's kids.