Anonymous
Post 03/01/2018 06:32     Subject: Re: How does redshirting work?
I've done both - redshirted and sent an August birthday on time. Oldest DS has an August birthday. He started school on time. He was small for his age - still is. He is now a senior in HS. Academically, he has always done fine in school. Socially, there have been a few hiccups on the way. 1st grade was a rough transition. 7th grade was really bad - there was one day he was crying because he couldn't open his locker. I am a little nervous about college. He will turn 18 and leave home a week later.

Second DS has a late September birthday. I redshirted him. He was VERY tall for his age - so not only was he the oldest in his class, he was head and shoulders taller than everyone. Academically he was advanced up until about 5th grade when everything seemed to even out. Socially, he fit right into his class until about 5th/6th grade. He went through puberty a little earlier than some of his friends. Around that time he seemed much older than a lot of his friends. He is now a freshman in high school. He is very athletic so physically he looks much older than many of his classmates.

Do I regret how I handled both situations? No. I made the right decision for the right child at the time.

One interesting thing about reading - the age that children learn to read is between 4 and 8. Just like walking - children learn to walk between 10 months and 16 months of age. As long as you are in that age range, it is considered developmentally age appropriate. The largest percentage learn to read at 6, and walk at 12-13 months of age. I have 3 children. All 3 learned to read within a month of being 6. The August birthday was in 1st grade (6 years old - was reading in late September of 1st grade.) The middle one was in kindergarten (6 years old - was reading when he started kindergarten.) The youngest was in the spring of kindergarten (has an April birthday and started reading around March.) All 3 read within a month of turning 6, but they were in different timeframes in their academic careers.
Anonymous
Post 02/28/2018 14:56     Subject: Re: How does redshirting work?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I've read several threads on DCUM where people hotly debate the pros and cons of redshirting, and it's never quite made sense to me. Assuming you're sending your kid to public school, why not just send him to kindergarten on time and avoid the expense of daycare/preschool for an additional year? If there's an issue with readiness/maturity/etc., he can repeat kindergarten based on the advice of his teachers. If not, then he can move on to first grade. No need to stress about the decision. Just see how he does in kindergarten and, if need be, he can repeat it.


Why place your kid in an environment that is not good for him? Part of the issue is that K is not what it used to be. Kids are writing and sitting much more than in the past.


Also, ther is a huge social stigma with retention. The kid will feel like
He failed. With redshirting children on the cusp parents generally say that they had a choice, they chose for the child to be older and it was all part of the plan. Every teacher will tell you: when in doubt, keep them out.



No, there isn't. No, he won't. No they don't.

Do what makes sense for your kid.


Exactly, my child is good friends with a retained child, the children don’t really have a clue and mature adults just don’t care.

Now, I do think if you choose to start kid earlier and it doesn’t go well, the decision to retain may not be 100% up to the parents, whereas redshirting is.


By 7-8, kids do know. My kid knows and he's one of the youngest.
I can't possibly imagine that there's a stigma for a September birthday. Those kids are inarguably on the cusp, as they would be past the cutoff in MD. I would have no problem telling my VA born daughter that I thought we might move to MD someday so I used their cutoff.
Anonymous
Post 02/28/2018 14:33     Subject: Re: How does redshirting work?
Anonymous wrote:My children were in a Montessori school where many students stayed for their kindergarten year, and then entered 1st grade at the public school. If your preschool offers an equivalent K curriculum, stay. Then you can decide whether to enter public in 1st or K.


we did the same - this way you can repeat K without really relating it (though our child entered 1st as the youngest in classs. It was still good to have the option)
Anonymous
Post 02/28/2018 05:51     Subject: Re: How does redshirting work?
Think about both ends of redshirting, OP


Sending a kid off to college at 17? I think not. It's hard enough at 18.
Anonymous
Post 02/28/2018 01:14     Subject: How does redshirting work?
Anonymous wrote:I started my kids on time, even though one of them arguably would have benefited from an extra year of preschool.

However, i did not want to have a 20-year-old high school senior. That's the other end of redshirting that nobody is talking about at all.

Preschool and grade school had its ups and downs since my kid was the youngest in the class, but now she's a star student in high school and will graduate HS at 17.

Think about both ends of redshirting, OP.


Go back to school, hon, the redshirted seniors are 18 years old. Plenty of kids take a gap year to mature as well so this is just foolish.
Anonymous
Post 02/28/2018 01:12     Subject: Re: How does redshirting work?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I've read several threads on DCUM where people hotly debate the pros and cons of redshirting, and it's never quite made sense to me. Assuming you're sending your kid to public school, why not just send him to kindergarten on time and avoid the expense of daycare/preschool for an additional year? If there's an issue with readiness/maturity/etc., he can repeat kindergarten based on the advice of his teachers. If not, then he can move on to first grade. No need to stress about the decision. Just see how he does in kindergarten and, if need be, he can repeat it.


Why place your kid in an environment that is not good for him? Part of the issue is that K is not what it used to be. Kids are writing and sitting much more than in the past.


Also, ther is a huge social stigma with retention. The kid will feel like
He failed. With redshirting children on the cusp parents generally say that they had a choice, they chose for the child to be older and it was all part of the plan. Every teacher will tell you: when in doubt, keep them out.



No, there isn't. No, he won't. No they don't.

Do what makes sense for your kid.


Yeah, no, no stigma. My redshirted DD is off to a top college next year - she was prepared for school each year and took advanced classes when she was ready. Worked nicely for her.
Anonymous
Post 02/28/2018 01:09     Subject: How does redshirting work?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote: My kid is only three, but their preschool is already talking about kindergarten readiness, and as they decide classrooms for next year the administrators asked some questions about our kindergarten plans. I had never heard of redshirting before, but my kid was born in early August. We live in Alexandria if that makes a difference. Sorry if this is all very obvious to everyone else but I am a first-time parent and I wasn’t sure about the logistics of this. It sounds like I can just choose whether to put my child in kindergarten right after he turns five or wait and do it right after he turns six, right? So far he is a little small for his age and tends to be very active and fidgety. I could see where giving him an extra year to mature and get a little bit more impulse control would probably make sitting at a desk for longer stretches a lot easier for him. On the other hand, he tends to do better with older kids, so it might be that he’d be happier as the youngest kid in the class versus being one of the older ones. I would love to hear perspectives and general information about how people make this decision so that I have some time to ponder and keep track of what’s happening with him.

You have the general idea. Studies have shown red shirting benefits initially. Long term there are various studies that show positive / negative, but it all depends on the SES of the parents.
I had the reverse issue - missed the K cutoff by 5 days, but could have pressed him ahead. He was / is very smart academically but immature emotionally, and he was small for his age (“failure to thrive” small). We figured best to keep him in his “correct” kindergarten class - also figuring with a lot of redshirting, if we pushed him ahead he would be the youngest by far and have kids almost 2 years older than him in class.
He is in second grade now and completely bored. He acts out because he is bored. He did not qualify for gifted... but after months of asking they have him doing accelerated work. Which in his school means he is on his iPad learning on his own but at least he’s not acting out.
Every child is different and every situation is different. But three is awefully young to try and decide whether to hold him back or not.


Is this public school? It is typically mind numbingly boring - he’s be just as bored in third grade as he is this year in second. Can you not send him to a different school?
Anonymous
Post 02/28/2018 00:51     Subject: Re: How does redshirting work?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I've read several threads on DCUM where people hotly debate the pros and cons of redshirting, and it's never quite made sense to me. Assuming you're sending your kid to public school, why not just send him to kindergarten on time and avoid the expense of daycare/preschool for an additional year? If there's an issue with readiness/maturity/etc., he can repeat kindergarten based on the advice of his teachers. If not, then he can move on to first grade. No need to stress about the decision. Just see how he does in kindergarten and, if need be, he can repeat it.


Why place your kid in an environment that is not good for him? Part of the issue is that K is not what it used to be. Kids are writing and sitting much more than in the past.


Also, ther is a huge social stigma with retention. The kid will feel like
He failed. With redshirting children on the cusp parents generally say that they had a choice, they chose for the child to be older and it was all part of the plan. Every teacher will tell you: when in doubt, keep them out.



No, there isn't. No, he won't. No they don't.

Do what makes sense for your kid.


Exactly, my child is good friends with a retained child, the children don’t really have a clue and mature adults just don’t care.

Now, I do think if you choose to start kid earlier and it doesn’t go well, the decision to retain may not be 100% up to the parents, whereas redshirting is.


By 7-8, kids do know. My kid knows and he's one of the youngest.
Anonymous
Post 02/27/2018 23:48     Subject: Re: How does redshirting work?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I've read several threads on DCUM where people hotly debate the pros and cons of redshirting, and it's never quite made sense to me. Assuming you're sending your kid to public school, why not just send him to kindergarten on time and avoid the expense of daycare/preschool for an additional year? If there's an issue with readiness/maturity/etc., he can repeat kindergarten based on the advice of his teachers. If not, then he can move on to first grade. No need to stress about the decision. Just see how he does in kindergarten and, if need be, he can repeat it.


Why place your kid in an environment that is not good for him? Part of the issue is that K is not what it used to be. Kids are writing and sitting much more than in the past.


Also, ther is a huge social stigma with retention. The kid will feel like
He failed. With redshirting children on the cusp parents generally say that they had a choice, they chose for the child to be older and it was all part of the plan. Every teacher will tell you: when in doubt, keep them out.




I was retained and it was awful. Constantly having to explain why i was in a great below, up until I graduated. I think it’s worse the older you are when you are retained.
No, there isn't. No, he won't. No they don't.

Do what makes sense for your kid.


Exactly, my child is good friends with a retained child, the children don’t really have a clue and mature adults just don’t care.

Now, I do think if you choose to start kid earlier and it doesn’t go well, the decision to retain may not be 100% up to the parents, whereas redshirting is.
Anonymous
Post 02/26/2018 10:28     Subject: Re: How does redshirting work?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I've read several threads on DCUM where people hotly debate the pros and cons of redshirting, and it's never quite made sense to me. Assuming you're sending your kid to public school, why not just send him to kindergarten on time and avoid the expense of daycare/preschool for an additional year? If there's an issue with readiness/maturity/etc., he can repeat kindergarten based on the advice of his teachers. If not, then he can move on to first grade. No need to stress about the decision. Just see how he does in kindergarten and, if need be, he can repeat it.


Why place your kid in an environment that is not good for him? Part of the issue is that K is not what it used to be. Kids are writing and sitting much more than in the past.


Also, ther is a huge social stigma with retention. The kid will feel like
He failed. With redshirting children on the cusp parents generally say that they had a choice, they chose for the child to be older and it was all part of the plan. Every teacher will tell you: when in doubt, keep them out.



No, there isn't. No, he won't. No they don't.

Do what makes sense for your kid.


Exactly, my child is good friends with a retained child, the children don’t really have a clue and mature adults just don’t care.

Now, I do think if you choose to start kid earlier and it doesn’t go well, the decision to retain may not be 100% up to the parents, whereas redshirting is.
Anonymous
Post 02/26/2018 00:06     Subject: Re: How does redshirting work?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I've read several threads on DCUM where people hotly debate the pros and cons of redshirting, and it's never quite made sense to me. Assuming you're sending your kid to public school, why not just send him to kindergarten on time and avoid the expense of daycare/preschool for an additional year? If there's an issue with readiness/maturity/etc., he can repeat kindergarten based on the advice of his teachers. If not, then he can move on to first grade. No need to stress about the decision. Just see how he does in kindergarten and, if need be, he can repeat it.


Why place your kid in an environment that is not good for him? Part of the issue is that K is not what it used to be. Kids are writing and sitting much more than in the past.


Also, ther is a huge social stigma with retention. The kid will feel like
He failed. With redshirting children on the cusp parents generally say that they had a choice, they chose for the child to be older and it was all part of the plan. Every teacher will tell you: when in doubt, keep them out.



No, there isn't. No, he won't. No they don't.

Do what makes sense for your kid.
Anonymous
Post 02/25/2018 23:27     Subject: How does redshirting work?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I started my kids on time, even though one of them arguably would have benefited from an extra year of preschool.

However, i did not want to have a 20-year-old high school senior. That's the other end of redshirting that nobody is talking about at all.

Preschool and grade school had its ups and downs since my kid was the youngest in the class, but now she's a star student in high school and will graduate HS at 17.

Think about both ends of redshirting, OP.


So, your DD will graduate at 17. Yet, you say that had you redshirted her, she would have graduated at 20? Do you not see a problem with this calculation?

I'd much prefer to have an 18 year old at graduation. I wouldn't want a 20 year old high school senior, either. And, that is not what happens.



Here is that 20 year old high school student again. That means if you redshirted your kid (graduated at 18, redshirted) they would have to be retained twice to graduate at 20. Pretty sure that never happens to anyone, ever.
Anonymous
Post 02/25/2018 16:46     Subject: How does redshirting work?
Anonymous wrote:I started my kids on time, even though one of them arguably would have benefited from an extra year of preschool.

However, i did not want to have a 20-year-old high school senior. That's the other end of redshirting that nobody is talking about at all.

Preschool and grade school had its ups and downs since my kid was the youngest in the class, but now she's a star student in high school and will graduate HS at 17.

Think about both ends of redshirting, OP.


So, your DD will graduate at 17. Yet, you say that had you redshirted her, she would have graduated at 20? Do you not see a problem with this calculation?

I'd much prefer to have an 18 year old at graduation. I wouldn't want a 20 year old high school senior, either. And, that is not what happens.
Anonymous
Post 02/25/2018 11:40     Subject: How does redshirting work?
I think it's way to early to decide. Go for the more academic class and decide a year+ from now when kindergarten registration opens up.

I sent my DD (late July bday) who is also a rambunctious, fidgety kid on time and she's been thriving (in ACPS--contrary to a PP not everyone bails on Alexandria). She was used to being at the young end of the class so it wasn't really new for her. She would have been bored to death spending another year in preschool.
Anonymous
Post 02/25/2018 10:22     Subject: How does redshirting work?
I started my kids on time, even though one of them arguably would have benefited from an extra year of preschool.

However, i did not want to have a 20-year-old high school senior. That's the other end of redshirting that nobody is talking about at all.

Preschool and grade school had its ups and downs since my kid was the youngest in the class, but now she's a star student in high school and will graduate HS at 17.

Think about both ends of redshirting, OP.