Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Depends on your access to a bathroom. With my various miscarriages I pretty much had to run to the bathroom once an hour to pass whatever. But usually that only lasted a day or two and after that was just heavy bleeding, manageable with a pad. If you are passing tissue for more than 2-3 days, I'd call your doctor.

Sick leave probably is best, though I understand it's hard with the shutdown and you would understandably be reluctant to disclose the miscarriage. I came close to a similar situation myself with my last miscarriage -- suspected ectopic and they insisted methotrexate had to be scheduled for a Tuesday that I had an oral argument. I was NOT looking forward to giving a reason to my boss -- or the court -- for that one. Fortunately I miscarried naturally the day before.

It really comes down to either toughing it out with lots of pads and hourly bathroom checks, or sick leave and likely telling them the reason. (Although, if you are a nonessential fed, you will not be allowed to take sick leave -- you would simply not report in and not be paid. No leave is permitted during the shutdown.)

When did we get to the point that a woman cannot take a sick day when she had miscarriage?

You can, of course, but many work places will require you to give a reason -- or at least doing so would be prudent if you are high up in your organization and don't want to be seen as a slacker when an important project is at stake. I don't know about you, but acknowledging miscarriage (or early pregnancy) is not something I'm interested in doing at work.

And the no sick leave if shut down is the law. If the government is shut down, all fed leave is canceled. Of course you don't report for work. But you can't call it sick leave, either. In the government you can't just take a "sick day"; you have to accrue and use actual hours of sick leave.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This thread is depressing as hell. I’m a pregnant biglaw lawyer and if I miscarrry — SEE YA! I’ll be back when I feel like it and I’m not explaining.

I couldn’t cancel a deposition with no explanation. Good Lord. Also in biglaw, if not obvious.

Anonymous wrote:Op, I took a week off when this happened to me. It was both emotional and physical recovery. You need rest, please take good care of yourself.

Anonymous wrote:This thread is depressing as hell. I’m a pregnant biglaw lawyer and if I miscarrry — SEE YA! I’ll be back when I feel like it and I’m not explaining.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Ok, so you're the boss, and on a key day for an unpopular project when all hands are supposed to be on board, one of the people administering the project calls in sick. What are your first thoughts? If you think "oh well, happens to everyone, let's cut her a break" then good for you, but you are in the minority in the work place. At least any place I've ever worked. I think most people think "geez, unless it's the flu, it couldn't kill her to suck it up and come in for one day?" or "yeah right, just because you don't like this project doesn't mean you get to dump it on everyone else."

I'm a federal supervisor and pretty lax about these things because I work in a small office where we've all known each other for years. I don't usually ask for explanations unless it's an ongoing trend or seems fishy. But other supervisors do.

Anywhere I've ever worked, if the person has a good track record for being reliable and committed...if they call in sick on a day like this I assume something must be really bad/wrong. I would especially think this when it comes to the bosses I've had, because they've all been super-committed workaholics.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This thread is depressing as hell. I’m a pregnant biglaw lawyer and if I miscarrry — SEE YA! I’ll be back when I feel like it and I’m not explaining.

seriously. some people here are insane.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This thread is depressing as hell. I’m a pregnant biglaw lawyer and if I miscarrry — SEE YA! I’ll be back when I feel like it and I’m not explaining.

seriously. some people here are insane.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Depends on your access to a bathroom. With my various miscarriages I pretty much had to run to the bathroom once an hour to pass whatever. But usually that only lasted a day or two and after that was just heavy bleeding, manageable with a pad. If you are passing tissue for more than 2-3 days, I'd call your doctor.

Sick leave probably is best, though I understand it's hard with the shutdown and you would understandably be reluctant to disclose the miscarriage. I came close to a similar situation myself with my last miscarriage -- suspected ectopic and they insisted methotrexate had to be scheduled for a Tuesday that I had an oral argument. I was NOT looking forward to giving a reason to my boss -- or the court -- for that one. Fortunately I miscarried naturally the day before.

It really comes down to either toughing it out with lots of pads and hourly bathroom checks, or sick leave and likely telling them the reason. (Although, if you are a nonessential fed, you will not be allowed to take sick leave -- you would simply not report in and not be paid. No leave is permitted during the shutdown.)

When did we get to the point that a woman cannot take a sick day when she had miscarriage?

You can, of course, but many work places will require you to give a reason -- or at least doing so would be prudent if you are high up in your organization and don't want to be seen as a slacker when an important project is at stake. I don't know about you, but acknowledging miscarriage (or early pregnancy) is not something I'm interested in doing at work.

And the no sick leave if shut down is the law. If the government is shut down, all fed leave is canceled. Of course you don't report for work. But you can't call it sick leave, either. In the government you can't just take a "sick day"; you have to accrue and use actual hours of sick leave.

one (unexplained) day off = slacker. unbelievable.

Ok, so you're the boss, and on a key day for an unpopular project when all hands are supposed to be on board, one of the people administering the project calls in sick. What are your first thoughts? If you think "oh well, happens to everyone, let's cut her a break" then good for you, but you are in the minority in the work place. At least any place I've ever worked. I think most people think "geez, unless it's the flu, it couldn't kill her to suck it up and come in for one day?" or "yeah right, just because you don't like this project doesn't mean you get to dump it on everyone else."

I'm a federal supervisor and pretty lax about these things because I work in a small office where we've all known each other for years. I don't usually ask for explanations unless it's an ongoing trend or seems fishy. But other supervisors do.

Anonymous wrote:
Ok, so you're the boss, and on a key day for an unpopular project when all hands are supposed to be on board, one of the people administering the project calls in sick. What are your first thoughts? If you think "oh well, happens to everyone, let's cut her a break" then good for you, but you are in the minority in the work place. At least any place I've ever worked. I think most people think "geez, unless it's the flu, it couldn't kill her to suck it up and come in for one day?" or "yeah right, just because you don't like this project doesn't mean you get to dump it on everyone else."

I'm a federal supervisor and pretty lax about these things because I work in a small office where we've all known each other for years. I don't usually ask for explanations unless it's an ongoing trend or seems fishy. But other supervisors do.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Depends on your access to a bathroom. With my various miscarriages I pretty much had to run to the bathroom once an hour to pass whatever. But usually that only lasted a day or two and after that was just heavy bleeding, manageable with a pad. If you are passing tissue for more than 2-3 days, I'd call your doctor.

Sick leave probably is best, though I understand it's hard with the shutdown and you would understandably be reluctant to disclose the miscarriage. I came close to a similar situation myself with my last miscarriage -- suspected ectopic and they insisted methotrexate had to be scheduled for a Tuesday that I had an oral argument. I was NOT looking forward to giving a reason to my boss -- or the court -- for that one. Fortunately I miscarried naturally the day before.

It really comes down to either toughing it out with lots of pads and hourly bathroom checks, or sick leave and likely telling them the reason. (Although, if you are a nonessential fed, you will not be allowed to take sick leave -- you would simply not report in and not be paid. No leave is permitted during the shutdown.)

When did we get to the point that a woman cannot take a sick day when she had miscarriage?

You can, of course, but many work places will require you to give a reason -- or at least doing so would be prudent if you are high up in your organization and don't want to be seen as a slacker when an important project is at stake. I don't know about you, but acknowledging miscarriage (or early pregnancy) is not something I'm interested in doing at work.

And the no sick leave if shut down is the law. If the government is shut down, all fed leave is canceled. Of course you don't report for work. But you can't call it sick leave, either. In the government you can't just take a "sick day"; you have to accrue and use actual hours of sick leave.

one (unexplained) day off = slacker. unbelievable.

Anonymous wrote:This thread is depressing as hell. I’m a pregnant biglaw lawyer and if I miscarrry — SEE YA! I’ll be back when I feel like it and I’m not explaining.