My children are grown (20s) and the day after they receive the gift a thank you note goes out (my relatives comment to me). When they were younger they were not allowed to use the gift until the note was written. Too much thought goes into a gift not to acknowledge it.
They get note cards and stamps from me as gifts.

Nope but we ALWAYS call when given a gift. No one gives ty cards in our family but don't call and it's offensive.

It's interesting to me that my older relatives get very offended if a Thank You card isn't sent in a timely manner, but they NEVER send them to me or any of my younger relatives.

They want to uphold this archaic tradition but not participate in it.

OP here. All of our gifts were opened in person this year. I do write thank yous when they just mail me gifts.

In an awful way, I sort of hope that if I don't write a thank you that people will stop giving us gifts. Their company at the holidays means way more to me than a gift.

Anonymous wrote:We call family and thank them or thank them in person. They especially appreciate a phone call more than a hand written note. My sister sends thank you notes to family and I find it strange and formal.

My relatives would prefer a phone call, too. Written notes are not "better" than verbal thanks; the important thing is that you acknowledge the gift (critical if is was mailed or not opened in person, so the giver knows that it was received at all) and express gratitude. I don't care how you do it, as long as you do it.

Well it is still a very nice/proper thing to do. I have a niece with Down's Syndrome who manages to write one line of thanks that must take her forever to write. So, I always think if she can do it, none of the rest of us have any excuse.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Parents/in laws/brother/sister verbal thank you
Grandparents/aunts/family friends hand written note

This. Anyone besides siblings and parents gets a handwritten thank you note, no exceptions.

Same. And I’m not even Southern (but I am from southern NJ!).

Ditto and I'm a New Yorker

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Parents/in laws/brother/sister verbal thank you
Grandparents/aunts/family friends hand written note

This. Anyone besides siblings and parents gets a handwritten thank you note, no exceptions.

Same. And I’m not even Southern (but I am from southern NJ!).

We call family and thank them or thank them in person. They especially appreciate a phone call more than a hand written note. My sister sends thank you notes to family and I find it strange and formal.