Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not trying to give you hope, but just because he has a girlfriend doesn’t mean he’s moved on. People get in rebound relationships all the time.

This. I am dating someone but still miss the guy who dumped me a couple months ago.

+1000 My ex's new girlfriend looks a lot like me except not as attractive, educated, not a professional, single mother, etc. I wish him luck.

Men don’t care about professional careers and education. They want a wife who is good looking, fun to be around with a nice demeanor, funny, has enthusiastic sex and is a good mother.

Chances are she’s just as or more attractive than you and your opinion of yourself doesn’t match the final product, hence why he moved on.

That's probably true but how many men from an UMC family will bring home someone who never went to college, was an unwed teenage mother, and works in the service industry? So completely different socioeconomically, education, race, and religion. Yes, let's say she is totally hot.

Anonymous wrote:Not trying to give you hope, but just because he has a girlfriend doesn’t mean he’s moved on. People get in rebound relationships all the time.

Don't tell her this. Guys aren't like women. They aren't as emotionally invested. They want sex. He's getting it elsewhere. I'm sorry OP. It hurts and it sucks. Go out with some girlfriends if you can.

OP cut the shit and go out and find some new guy to bang already.

Anonymous wrote:Keep repeating to yourself that you deserve better, because you do. It's better to be alone than with a loser. Trust me, I've been single for a decade. (single mom, in fact which for some reason you are listing as a detriment, I'd say it makes me awesome-- a lot more awesome than their loser dad who happily moved on with a woman who doesn't want to be bothered with his original family!)

I am sorry. I shouldn't have listed the new girlfriend being a single mom as a detriment. I only meant that ex has no business dating someone who has a young child. But ex is inherently selfish, self absorbed with a sense of entitlement, he really wants a family although he cannot provide and support one. I know he recently spent a lot of money on a trip trying to impress her, sweeping her off her feet, and racking up more credit card debt. I try hard to stop being his mom but the guy really needs a MOMMY.

Keep repeating to yourself that you deserve better, because you do. It's better to be alone than with a loser. Trust me, I've been single for a decade. (single mom, in fact which for some reason you are listing as a detriment, I'd say it makes me awesome-- a lot more awesome than their loser dad who happily moved on with a woman who doesn't want to be bothered with his original family!)

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What does his new gf being a single mom have to do with anything? You're a jealous bitch. I hope he married that girl. Ha!

That'll serve you right.

If she is dumb enough to marry him, she'll have to support him along with her daughter and any kids they have. He's a man in his 30s who can't hold a job despite having a Masters degree.

Why are you so sad about him then?

The new girlfriend will inspire him to msn ip, get a steady job and be responsible. Watch!

It was hard to break up with him because I loved him, he is a really nice guy and on paper looks great. Just cannot hold down a job - spotty work history, never held a job longer than a year and he is in his thirties. Cannot support himself - gets help from his parents and has a trust fund- much less a family. He spends most of his time on a hobby and volunteering for good causes which is nice but an adult should have a job and be able to support himself even if they have a trust fund. He has a good education but is never on time, is immature, disorganized but refuses to get treatment: I suspect he has ADHD. He insists there is nothing wrong with him and makes excuses for everything. He isn't husband material unless I want a lifetime of grief.

I broke up with him because I know he won't change and I don't want to support an adult. But if his new girlfriend who has a young child wants to take on the project of helping him become a responsible adult, good luck to her.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What does his new gf being a single mom have to do with anything? You're a jealous bitch. I hope he married that girl. Ha!

That'll serve you right.

If she is dumb enough to marry him, she'll have to support him along with her daughter and any kids they have. He's a man in his 30s who can't hold a job despite having a Masters degree.

Why are you so sad about him then?

The new girlfriend will inspire him to msn ip, get a steady job and be responsible. Watch!

Anonymous wrote:What does his new gf being a single mom have to do with anything? You're a jealous bitch. I hope he married that girl. Ha!

That'll serve you right.

If she is dumb enough to marry him, she'll have to support him along with her daughter and any kids they have. He's a man in his 30s who can't hold a job despite having a Masters degree.

What does his new gf being a single mom have to do with anything? You're a jealous bitch. I hope he married that girl. Ha!

That'll serve you right.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not trying to give you hope, but just because he has a girlfriend doesn’t mean he’s moved on. People get in rebound relationships all the time.

This. I am dating someone but still miss the guy who dumped me a couple months ago.

+1000 My ex's new girlfriend looks a lot like me except not as attractive, educated, not a professional, single mother, etc. I wish him luck.

And yet, he has chosen to be with her.

Yes, after I dumped him for being a irresponsible, inconsiderate, disrespectful drama queen. He is welcome to her. Poor thing.

Give it time. The only thing that heals a broken heart is time. And remember if you look hard enough there's someone out there for you too. May be hard to see now, but there is.

Read "Biology" book by Robert Sapolsky. Your feelings stems from human biological instinct to survive and replicate. If you found a new boyfriend who was better looking, more successful, with better personality and who treated you better than your ex, you would not have thought or felt that way at all. But since you are still single, you feel rejected by seeing his new gf and feeling bad that he's moved on like you didn't even matter.

This bad feeling will go away. It's ok to feel how you feel. I found that going to the gym and eating healthy has always helped after breakup. Once I get in better shape, I start feeling like a new and improved version of myself. Inevitably other men start chasing me, and the ex becomes a distant memory.

You can't ask for help with the tough parts and not reward us with the good parts....I agree with pp, what lunacy?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Thanks for the encouragement. It's just particularly difficult because I'm here nursing a broken heart and he's in the throes of new love. I know I don't know the full story but I do know that he is seeing someone new which, as a PP mentioned, really makes it feel final.

We live in a very very small town and I'm dreading going out and seeing them over and over and over again. I need to distract myself but dammit. This is hard.

Do you really think having a girlfriend means it's "new love"? Plenty of people date to date, and give each other the bf/gf titles and it really doesn't mean much. That said, this is a feeling I think everyone goes through. Part of the modern human experience, I guess. Eventually, you really will stop caring. Promise.

Thanks. I just feel played. We got each other Christmas presents (after the break up) and were in communication, but he totally fell off the face of the planet a couple of weeks ago. Now I know why. I suppose I was holding on to hope that we would reconcile. Clearly, no. Especially not after my lunacy yesterday!

What lunacy? Btw, he didn't lie. Seems like he figured out how to be single. When you are single, you date.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not trying to give you hope, but just because he has a girlfriend doesn’t mean he’s moved on. People get in rebound relationships all the time.

This. I am dating someone but still miss the guy who dumped me a couple months ago.

+1000 My ex's new girlfriend looks a lot like me except not as attractive, educated, not a professional, single mother, etc. I wish him luck.

And yet, he has chosen to be with her.