Anonymous wrote:I'm a newish mom and don't see what's so important about going to kid friendly restaurants? My 2 year old eats whatever we eat. I'm not taking her to Michelin star restaurants, but likewise, refuse to go to McDonalds, Chilis, Ihop, Chuck E Cheese. I'm a really fun mom and love to cook.

The ones you mentioned are not the only kid friendly restaurants. Typically I consider anything with a kids menu, and no table cloths to be kid friendly particularly for lunch or an early dinner.

My mom was my girl scout troop leader. We had lots of sleep overs with friends. We went to the zoo regularly as well as the movies (even though my mom hated the movies). She took us to the park every day when the weather was warm. We went to the roller/ice skating rink often as well as bowling with her. She was a SAHM and we didn't go to camp in the summer so she kept us entertained. We lived in NYC so there was a lot to do.

She also came on every field trip and would typically stop by the school yard at recess. We lived a block away so she was usually going to or coming from some errand.

She even took me to aerobics class with her (she was best friends with my best friend's mom so all 4 of us went)

My dad worked a lot. There was a time (maybe in junior high) when we played pool every Saturday.

That said he was the "sillier" parent at home and always helped us with our school projects. He is a great artist and knew how to make things look good without spending too much.

This was in the 70s and 80s. I guess I had fun parents.
They did also have their own activities without us. Not sure how, but they made it work.

I am definitely the fun parent now, DS is an only so we do play dates and lots of other activities. I took him to see Dan TDM. We went to Awesome Con and the Monster Truck Show. We do a big group trick or treat. I am active at his school so I try to make all the events but as I WOH I can't always make it work.

He and I travel for 5 weeks ever summer and do some pretty fun stuff. I also try to play video games with him sometimes. He loves them so it makes him happy.

The main differences between me and my mom are she stayed home while I work, and I have more disposable income than she had, but we both made it work. With less money she certainly was creative.

I don't think parents have to engage with their kids every hour of the day but I am certainly from the "play with your kids" school of parenting. I guess that is how I was raised.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm a newish mom and don't see what's so important about going to kid friendly restaurants? My 2 year old eats whatever we eat. I'm not taking her to Michelin star restaurants, but likewise, refuse to go to McDonalds, Chilis, Ihop, Chuck E Cheese. I'm a really fun mom and love to cook.

+1 My husband and I get countless comments about our 10 yr old's "advanced" palate from other parents, friends, waiters, etc. From an early age (2ish), our child ate what we ate, from raw mussels to roasted Brussel sprouts!

Yes, but you are probably engaging with your 10 year old at the table, teaching them about the foods, looking at the restaurant menu with them, treating them like they're part of the experience, etc. So you're making it fun. Versus I bet OP's parents just plunked the kid down in a chair, told the child to be quiet, and gave them whatever to eat quietly, hoping the child didn't interrupt the adult conversation.

+1

A lot of grandparents seem to take issue with the inclusion that today's parents give their own children. As they should.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm a newish mom and don't see what's so important about going to kid friendly restaurants? My 2 year old eats whatever we eat. I'm not taking her to Michelin star restaurants, but likewise, refuse to go to McDonalds, Chilis, Ihop, Chuck E Cheese. I'm a really fun mom and love to cook.

+1 My husband and I get countless comments about our 10 yr old's "advanced" palate from other parents, friends, waiters, etc. From an early age (2ish), our child ate what we ate, from raw mussels to roasted Brussel sprouts!

Yes, but you are probably engaging with your 10 year old at the table, teaching them about the foods, looking at the restaurant menu with them, treating them like they're part of the experience, etc. So you're making it fun. Versus I bet OP's parents just plunked the kid down in a chair, told the child to be quiet, and gave them whatever to eat quietly, hoping the child didn't interrupt the adult conversation.

Anonymous wrote:I'm a newish mom and don't see what's so important about going to kid friendly restaurants? My 2 year old eats whatever we eat. I'm not taking her to Michelin star restaurants, but likewise, refuse to go to McDonalds, Chilis, Ihop, Chuck E Cheese. I'm a really fun mom and love to cook.

This was just an example the OP used as part of the whole--I'm sure if you love to cook and do other kid-friendly things, you're focusing on your kids.

And if you're making the eating out at whatever restaurant interesting and teaching them about different foods and engaging them at the table versus expecting the kid to just sit through it and viewing the kid as a burden while you enjoy your meal, you are making that restaurant "kid-friendly" so to speak.

Anonymous wrote:I'm a newish mom and don't see what's so important about going to kid friendly restaurants? My 2 year old eats whatever we eat. I'm not taking her to Michelin star restaurants, but likewise, refuse to go to McDonalds, Chilis, Ihop, Chuck E Cheese. I'm a really fun mom and love to cook.

+1 My husband and I get countless comments about our 10 yr old's "advanced" palate from other parents, friends, waiters, etc. From an early age (2ish), our child ate what we ate, from raw mussels to roasted Brussel sprouts!

I was very relieved that my parents were hands-off. My friend, an only, had to call her mom before we left my house for the skating rink (my mom was driving), then again from a pay phone when we arrived at the skating rink, then again when we were leaving, etc. However now that I have dcs, I have become resentful of my parents, mostly because I thought they would be more enthusiastic grandparents.

My parents were fun in that they went all out with decorations and parties for the holidays and family events. However, I was expected to act appropriately in adult venues and we did not eat "kid-friendly" food or go to kid friendly places. My mom loves recreational shopping and most of the time, I'd go to a bookstore and read while my mom shopped for fun (when I was school age or older). I had a lot of fun with my family, but even though my dad was a partner in a law firm and my mom was in school administration/leadership, we never traveled or went on vacations, didn't do a lot of kid centered stuff. We did have a swimming pool and we had activities that we did (soccer, swimming, ballet). My parents think my kids have too structured of lives. Mind you, I was in a preprofessional ballet program at age 6 and by the time I was in middle school, did ballet from after school until almost 10 pm every night of the week and Saturday mornings.

Anonymous wrote:I'm a newish mom and don't see what's so important about going to kid friendly restaurants? My 2 year old eats whatever we eat. I'm not taking her to Michelin star restaurants, but likewise, refuse to go to McDonalds, Chilis, Ihop, Chuck E Cheese. I'm a really fun mom and love to cook.

My kids are early elementary school and we don't take them to many kid-friendly restaurants like the ones you describe because we don't eat from fast food restaurants, and don't like many chain restaurants.

I agree with the other posters that parenting has changed. I was not an only child and spent a lot of time playing with my brother or friends, hanging outside, riding bikes, etc. However, my parents and grandparents did take us to family-friendly places such as Disney World, the beach, camping, kid-friendly restaurants growing up. They also did just grown up stuff and expected us to entertain ourselves. I thought my childhood was very balanced.

No, but they were good parents.

My mom would do kid-friendly activities with me and occasionally play with me as well. My dad not so much. My parents were older and very overprotective. I think I had a wonderful childhood though.

I'm a newish mom and don't see what's so important about going to kid friendly restaurants? My 2 year old eats whatever we eat. I'm not taking her to Michelin star restaurants, but likewise, refuse to go to McDonalds, Chilis, Ihop, Chuck E Cheese. I'm a really fun mom and love to cook.

I’m surprised at the number of only children saying that their parents were not fun. Back in the 70’s and 80’s only kids were a lot less common than they are now. I’m thinking these people’s parents were just not kid people and/or didn’t want a ‘fun’ kid centered life in the first place and that’s the reason they chose to have only 1 child and live an adult focused lifestyle.

I'm not sure. I love my parents and like many parents they did some very good things and some really bad things. As far as being fun, sure - as long as it fit within their definition of fun. My mom loves shopping, so she took me shopping a lot. I had sleepovers and she brought us very nice snacks and planned birthday parties with me.

They did not take me to kid friendly stuff.
They did not encourage or push or enforce any activities; I wasn't very outgoing and moved to a new school mid-elementary, so I didn't want to do anything. They say to the day that it's my fault I didn't do any sports or skills. I don't think they understand the role of parents in this realm.
I was also an only, and though they provided me LOTS of things and loved me, they generally left me to do my own stuff so I spend much of childhood watching tv, eating, hanging out in my awesome room, and doing a lot less typical "kid" stuff. I was happy and we have a good relationship, but I was an overweight teen and ran into some social difficulties (regarding lack of supervision) so I am an opposite type of parent to my child now.

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Here's another example. When I was little, I would occasionally have a friend over to play, but my mother viewed this as a chance to keep me busy and out of her hair so she could have time to herself.

My kids are 2 and 4 and when I told her we don't do drop off playdates yet she was shocked. She was stunned that I have to "entertain the mother too" instead of "having time to myself" when we do playdates. She viewed entertaining the mother has a burden.

I view playdates as a chance to have fun, and most importantly build community for my kids by making family friends with the other family--both parents usually come to the playdate. But it's a chance for me to make friends, build community, and make friends for my kids. In contrast, my father never ever would have taken me to a playdate or birthday party when I was growing up, let alone stayed for the duration, and my parents never had families over for anything. They had lots of adults only dinner parties, but I was expected to stay in my room and not come out during the party.

Times have changed. What your mother did was very commonplace when I was growing up too.

The pendulum has swung, hard in the other direction. I think a balance is needed. Kids don't benefit from things being all fun all the time, and the center of attention either.