Yes, they will come back, but there’s a lot of dysfunction in that. Be smart and keep moving forward. Once it’s over, it’s over.

Anonymous wrote:All twenty-two of mine are in jail ... so no.

But once they get parole, you are set, girl!

I would say about 75% of the men I've dated have tried to come back around at some point.

2 of my 3 exes from very serious, long term relationships came back. I got back with one of them, ended in disaster a second time.

I've had several guys from 2-4 month relationships come fishing back around anywhere from 3 months to a year later. I've never entertained those...I've usually been long over them by that point and had no interest. One has been reaching out for over two years now with no response from me.

4 of my 5 serious exes have tried, yes.

I met my DH at 21, so only had a couple major relationships before that: a high school boyfriend of several months who pursued me hard, we had a fairly intense several months, and then he broke up with me out of the blue (I suspect to get back with his ex who he'd been with for 2.5 years before dating me). I didn't really care when we broke up, and I stopped thinking about him quickly. When I went to college 6 months later, he tracked me down through a mutual friend and sent me an email (this was 1997 - email was new) along the lines of: "you were the most important thing that's ever happened to me, our brief relationship was one of the most powerful things in my life. you have such a special place in my heart." I wrote him back along the lines of "hey, great to hear from you! Email is so crazy! How's life?!" I don't know if he was looking for a new relationship (long distance) but I really just didn't care. Our relationship was fun, he probably didn't treat me the best at the end, but I harbor no ill-will to him. We have sent a couple pleasant notes on facebook over the years.

And my college boyfriend of 3 years, who I had a totally f-d up, abusive nasty relationship with, where he broke up with me like 22 times (and he always came back - and I was a dumb depressed 20 year old, and stupidly felt like I needed to show people that I could make the relationship work lest I was a failure) and he finally went overseas for a semester and it was the greatest thing ever because I really despised him for most of our relationship and it wasn't till he was physically gone and I knew he wouldn't be coming back that I could get on with things. I met my DH 6 months later and it was the BEST since day one (17 years ago). I haven't seen the ex since the day he left town. A week later he sent me a possessive "I sure hope you're not going to hook up with our mutual friend Larlo" email. That was the last straw and I wrote him back to never contact me again. Every time there is a new communication platform (Hotmail! Gmail! Myspace! Facebook! LinkedIn!) he tracks me down and sends a "what's up dude!" note. I have literally never responded since I sent him the "never contact me again" email in 2001. It's his way of still trying to be a control freak.

So yes, my experience is that the men are more likely to be the jerks in the relationship, and regardless of how hard they dropped you, are more likely to crawl back when you move on. That said, I'd never want one of those jerks creeping back into my life.

Anonymous wrote:Yes, I have had a few that came back, but I did not open the door to a relationship. You have to move on, just move on. It just wasn't healthy for me to pine about these few guys, although I truly do care about them still. I move on and in time found the right relationship without settling. Move on.

You still care about them? What on earth do you mean by that ?

All twenty-two of mine are in jail ... so no.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I also suspect this may be the same poster who was dancing, doing yoga and crying last week when her boyfriend was late coming over.

And she is also known as “Eminem Nanny.”

I missed this one. Details?

I don't think she is Eminem Nanny. I do think Eminem Nanny is the one who has a "boyfriend" with a baby due. There was a thread last week.

Mine took a "break" then chased me like hell and we got married. Buyer beware though, sometimes I get suspicious and have trust issues. After all I couldn't say he'd never leave me!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I also suspect this may be the same poster who was dancing, doing yoga and crying last week when her boyfriend was late coming over.

And she is also known as “Eminem Nanny.”

I missed this one. Details?

Yes- always. But then the relationships would eventually end. Just a slow death to them.

No. mine haven't. Not even the ex I was engaged to, dated for 7 years and then I just walked away one day. He never came after me

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I also suspect this may be the same poster who was dancing, doing yoga and crying last week when her boyfriend was late coming over.

And she is also known as “Eminem Nanny.”

I don't know who she is, or who you are, but will you please go away with your negative Nancy crap if you don't want to give some productive advise to the Op. She/he clearly needs to talk, not be scolded or mocked. Go away.

Yes, I have had a few that came back, but I did not open the door to a relationship. You have to move on, just move on. It just wasn't healthy for me to pine about these few guys, although I truly do care about them still. I move on and in time found the right relationship without settling. Move on.

Anonymous wrote:I also suspect this may be the same poster who was dancing, doing yoga and crying last week when her boyfriend was late coming over.

And she is also known as “Eminem Nanny.”