A man who cannot "let" his wife have the choice to stay at home or not is worthless. There is no point in being married to you if you cannot offer the most basic thing.

A woman who is discussing whether or not she can "let" her husband stay at home or not has a worthless husband.

Omg yes. If I made 300-400k I would love if dh stayed home. He could do his phd, write, work out, spend time with dd. He's the laundry We would keep our awesome nanny and not buy a more expensive house. We make $250 combined and are comfrable and have decent savings and a nanny. But id only take a new job if it didn't mean a major increase in hours or travel.

Anonymous wrote:I would support my spouse staying home at any salary -- it's not about letting them do it. If $400k isn't enough money for you to "let" your wife stay at home and take care of your children, I don't know what to tell you.

+1

Anonymous wrote:My DH is at 400+ take home per year but I dont have the risk tolerance to be a SAHM.

Mostly - I'd feel guilty putting all our eggs in one basket (DH's job) and I would feel guilty if my DH felt that stress.

Makes no psychological/econonmic sense as we can logically afford to.

But I'd rather hedge. That's just me though.

That means you are spending a huge amount. It is very easy to do. You live off $250 and save $150 in retirement, emergency fund, college fund and general savings.

Anonymous wrote:This week a colleague with circumstances similar to yours was fired. His wife quit work two years ago when his pay went up and they just bought an expensive house. Job and income stability would be my tipping point on your question.

But, that was their mistake. You don't go buying a fancy house and you save the difference for a few years and make sure you have money to live off of for at least a year just in case.

I would support my spouse staying home at any salary -- it's not about letting them do it. If $400k isn't enough money for you to "let" your wife stay at home and take care of your children, I don't know what to tell you.

My DH is at 400+ take home per year but I dont have the risk tolerance to be a SAHM.

Mostly - I'd feel guilty putting all our eggs in one basket (DH's job) and I would feel guilty if my DH felt that stress.

Makes no psychological/econonmic sense as we can logically afford to.

But I'd rather hedge. That's just me though.

This week a colleague with circumstances similar to yours was fired. His wife quit work two years ago when his pay went up and they just bought an expensive house. Job and income stability would be my tipping point on your question.

My DH and I both had business careers for about the first 10-12 years of our marriage. He too started making a lot of money and I decided I was tired of child care, nannies etc and all that goes with it so I became a SAHM. But, I joined the Board of a non-profit and eventually I became the executive director (small salary but work I loved) and I was able to do all of my work when they were in school. It kept me close to home and I was very engaged in the community. We had always been big savers so my becoming a SAHM did not change our lifestyle.

Unless your wife was making close to $200,000 at worst you will be even. If she was making $100,000 you will be well ahead when you eliminate chid care costs which you pay after tax. And as my DH would say, "happy wife, happy life". Figure out how to make it work and you will be happy you did.

How sure are you that you will keep making 400k?

LOL OP is so clueless.

Well, for starters, my DH doesn't "let" me do anything. I'm a grown ass adult in a marriage where we discuss things like this until we reach an agreements. My DH loves that I am at home, but would support my decision if I wanted to go back to working full time.

'let'

I stay home, and stayed home even when our HHI was 80K with two small children.
Today, If I had the same earning potential as my husband, and could get a job, he could stay home and I could go to work.

It's good for one parent to have more time to look after the house and kids, either with a part-time job or no paid job at all.

In your case, your spouse could stay home, mainly because you can afford it and he or she wants to. You need to respect that desire.

OP - it's not about money, it's more about your circumstances. For us, yes, I would ask DW to stay if she wants to.