I remember when I was in middle school in California, my folks gave me an option of an all-girl private school that might have had 100 people total (it seemed like that to me at the time) and they were known for graduating in white ball gowns with a bouquet of roses. I was like, "please, let me go to the big, co-ed, local public school." It was nice to find my group and have different groups if there was a fall-out over something.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"Mean girls" don't exist in elementary school. That's just kids learning social skills. "Mean girls" is a middle school and high school thing.

I've seen mean girl behavior in preschool!

Me too! The girls in my school started some really cliquey behavior in PK4 last year, and it hasn't improved. Thankfully, I have boys who DGAF.

Anonymous wrote:OK, here's a very dumb/naïve question: What are you defining as "mean girl" behavior?

Excluding? Teasing? Bullying? I hear the term a lot and I thought I knew what it meant, but now I'm not sure (in terms of girls specifically, not just kids)...

Thanks in advance.

google it -- lots of good articles.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OK, here's a very dumb/naïve question: What are you defining as "mean girl" behavior?

Excluding? Teasing? Bullying? I hear the term a lot and I thought I knew what it meant, but now I'm not sure (in terms of girls specifically, not just kids)...

Thanks in advance.

Yes excluding, teasing, bullying, mocking looks or wardrobe/intelligence.

Mocking interests too. Anything unusual because fodder for taunting.

Anonymous wrote:OK, here's a very dumb/naïve question: What are you defining as "mean girl" behavior?

Excluding? Teasing? Bullying? I hear the term a lot and I thought I knew what it meant, but now I'm not sure (in terms of girls specifically, not just kids)...

Thanks in advance.

Yes excluding, teasing, bullying, mocking looks or wardrobe/intelligence.

OK, here's a very dumb/naïve question: What are you defining as "mean girl" behavior?

Excluding? Teasing? Bullying? I hear the term a lot and I thought I knew what it meant, but now I'm not sure (in terms of girls specifically, not just kids)...

Thanks in advance.

We were at a smaller school and the mean girl dynamics were very prevalent. Moved or a larger DCPS elementary and a much better situation.

My only regret - not moving schools sooner.

There are definitely girl "friend" dynamics at the new larger school - but I think the school does a good job to address. (from what I have heard)

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"Mean girls" don't exist in elementary school. That's just kids learning social skills. "Mean girls" is a middle school and high school thing.

Wrong. There are definitely some girls that are just hard wired to be more aggressive and know how to use words to really hurt other girls. Starts in preschool. We need to call it our for what it is.

I don't think it is "wiring" but rather a parenting problem. Some apples don't fall far from the tree. It's a learned behavior.

Anonymous wrote:"Mean girls" don't exist in elementary school. That's just kids learning social skills. "Mean girls" is a middle school and high school thing.

Wrong. There are definitely some girls that are just hard wired to be more aggressive and know how to use words to really hurt other girls. Starts in preschool. We need to call it our for what it is.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So much has to do with your child's teacher. My child had some difficulty fitting in, but the teacher recognized this and created opportunities for more mixing in the classroom, which really helped. They also started a "girls book club" that met before school once a week. It created another opportunity for bonding and positive interactions.

This makes me feel better. Thank you so much! I feel like her current school is doing nothing and she is miserable. She may be miserable at a new school next year but at least I won't be paying tuition. My hope is DCPS has more variety. I know Deal is large so she will really have a large number of girls and should be able to "find her tribe."

She will absolutely have the opportunity to find her tribe at Deal. The after school clubs are fantastic for this, and the teachers (in our experience) really get middle school, and if she is struggling, they have a knack for encouraging kids to join the clubs where they will find friends. There is such a huge range of interests there.

Anonymous wrote:"Mean girls" don't exist in elementary school. That's just kids learning social skills. "Mean girls" is a middle school and high school thing.

I've seen mean girl behavior in preschool!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"Mean girls" don't exist in elementary school. That's just kids learning social skills. "Mean girls" is a middle school and high school thing.

uh, I beg to differ.

-signed mom of 4th grader at a EOTP DCPS whose daughter just yesterday experienced definite Mean Girl behaviour that had nothing to do with social skills

Hoo boy I even recall the mean girls of elementary school from when I was a kid. They were VICIOUS!

Some girls learn being mean at a very early age. Probably from their DCUM addicted moms.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"Mean girls" don't exist in elementary school. That's just kids learning social skills. "Mean girls" is a middle school and high school thing.

uh, I beg to differ.

-signed mom of 4th grader at a EOTP DCPS whose daughter just yesterday experienced definite Mean Girl behaviour that had nothing to do with social skills

Hoo boy I even recall the mean girls of elementary school from when I was a kid. They were VICIOUS!

Anonymous wrote:"Mean girls" don't exist in elementary school. That's just kids learning social skills. "Mean girls" is a middle school and high school thing.

What a stupid thing to say.

There are absolutely some precocious 3rd to 5th graders in many schools who meet the definition of mean girls.