My 8th grader is 9pm "ish" during the school year and 10pm during the summer with exceptions for stuff like sleepovers or the Super Bowl, etc.

My middle schooler is usually in bed by 9, even in the summer (although we're more flexible then), and we don't eat dinner until 7ish either - doing both as especially easy in the summer when there is no HW or sports!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your 12 year old is ok going to bed at 8:30 in the summer? We don't even eat dinner until 7 or later.

Yes. Both kids have the same bedtime, except the 7 year old wakes up earlier. Once or twice a week there's a movie or something that pushed back bedtime, and during the school year, sometimes he's had to finish homework late.

To answer the other PP's question, DS has had this routine for many years, so in his case he hasn't needed to increase his sleep time.

DP... lights out at 9pm for my 12 yr old, too. We eat around 6pm. This is one advantage of me being a sahm, and DH either wfh or coming home by 5:30. My younger one goes to bed by 8pm. It's one of the reasons we eat at 6.

They stay up as late as they want in the summer. They have to get up at 6 for school, so I make them be in bed no later than 10.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:School starts for my middle schooler at 7:50 am. He starts getting ready for bed at 8:30 pm with complete lights out and silence by 9.

Complete silence? You sound like a dictator, lol.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:School starts for my middle schooler at 7:50 am. He starts getting ready for bed at 8:30 pm with complete lights out and silence by 9.

Complete silence? You sound like a dictator, lol.

Are you stupid? Silence and lights out by 9 is eminently reasonable. Would you let your kid warble all night long?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My DD had a TON of homework in 6th grade and was often not finishing until midnight.

What time did she start her HW? Just asking because it seems odd that a 6th grader would have 6-7+ hours of HW (assuming they got started around 5 or 6).

She either had track or ice skating or hanging out with friends and generally got home at 6 or 7pm. On ice skating day she'd come home right after school to get in a couple of hours of homework before going to ice skating from 8-9:30.

There was one teacher I had to push back against and say this is too much, I'm cutting DD off after she's spent 2 hours on math. And with another teacher she encouraged that we set a time limit and once DD had invested what we agreed on, she was to stop. Sixth grade was the Year of Perfection and DD took that year learning how much effort was appropriate.

Now she's in 9th, and the other day she told me what homework she has and when I asked how long she thought it would take she said "An hour and a half?" and then I timed her. 1 hr 35 min. for two subjects.

Anonymous wrote:My suggestion: this last week before school begins, adjust their bedtime earlier to the point where they wake up naturally at more or less the right time to get ready for school. That's the right amount of sleep for them. As you get into the schoolyear, if you have to drag them out of bed in the morning, they probably need an earlier bedtime.

This is what I'm doing. Kids went into their rooms at 8 and light out at 8:30. This morning one kid got up at 9 and one kid at 11. They need to be up by 6:45 when school starts. I don't think I can give them a 7pm bedtime.

Anonymous wrote:School starts for my middle schooler at 7:50 am. He starts getting ready for bed at 8:30 pm with complete lights out and silence by 9.

Complete silence? You sound like a dictator, lol.