Anonymous
07/19/2017 12:35
Subject: If you are an only child
I'm an only and the issues I had with my childhood had nothing to do with not having siblings. My father was emotionally abusive, but my mom did what she could to make up for it. She and I have a great relationship now, and my dad and I continue to have a tenuous relationship.
Anonymous
07/18/2017 11:33
Subject: Re:If you are an only child
Anonymous wrote:OP here. I am not close to my parents now. They moved very far away for their retirement (to a location that had no meaning to them, no family there either) and they made the choice to move there knowing we (and their only Grandchild) are here. It's disappointing. They're content with twice a year visits. I feel like my father could have been more involved but he was largely disinterested and spent most of his free time watching TV. Even when I visit now he still does that, and ignores us. It's sad. How do I move past this resentment about how I was raised? Unfortunately I don't have any extended family and feel very alone in the world being an only child and not having loving extended family.
You're a grown up. If family being close to you is important, go move to where your parents are. Oh you can't because of your job? Well those are your priorities.
Bottom line it's time to stop blaming your parents for your unhappiness and for things not being as you want them to be. Grow the hell up!
Anonymous
07/18/2017 11:22
Subject: Re:If you are an only child
OP here. I am not close to my parents now. They moved very far away for their retirement (to a location that had no meaning to them, no family there either) and they made the choice to move there knowing we (and their only Grandchild) are here. It's disappointing. They're content with twice a year visits. I feel like my father could have been more involved but he was largely disinterested and spent most of his free time watching TV. Even when I visit now he still does that, and ignores us. It's sad. How do I move past this resentment about how I was raised? Unfortunately I don't have any extended family and feel very alone in the world being an only child and not having loving extended family.
Anonymous
07/18/2017 09:13
Subject: If you are an only child
My dad worked and traveled a ton, my mom was around a lot but I was also raised by a nanny. I had a happy childhood and still have a good relationship with my parents. I think everyone's life is different.
Anonymous
07/17/2017 21:33
Subject: If you are an only child
I'm an only ( older sibling died in childhood ) my parents were both very involved. My mom is however extremely controlling. It I had to pick the more involved parent in both childhood and now it would be my dad. He took me and my friends trick or treating every year. He took me to the dentist he stayed home with me when I was sick. He stayed home on snow days. He also had a more flexible job to do those things however. He also picked me up early from school once a month to go get ice cream and go to a movie .
Anonymous
07/17/2017 21:30
Subject: Re:If you are an only child
I'm an only and am very close with both parents. They divorced when I was in middle school but had joint custody so I saw them equal amounts of time. They are both happily remarried and I am still close with them, their spouses, and my stepsibs. OP, I think your issue stems from your parents and not the fact that you're an only.
Anonymous
07/17/2017 21:19
Subject: If you are an only child
As an only child too, I hear your question but my own inner searching wonders if this really has anything particular to do with being an only? I would describe mine as similar to your description but I think I had a pretty happy childhood. Do I fault my parents? Yup, but they also did a lot of good for me. Now, of course that might not be the same for you. But it's true, I felt lonely on all vacations, and like a third wheel frequently. But as soon as I was old enough, I threw myself into other relationships, for better and worse. In high school I was in more clubs than not, and kept busy till all hours, had lots of friends etc...in hindsight I can see I was avoiding them and their tediousness...