There would be nothing wrong with "educating" these girls...
One of the "bullies" has a mom that is a bully,maybe she could be educated as well!

Nobody said anything about suing. How about just being held accountable? How about some consequences if the school doesn't do anything like they haven't done anything in the past 5 years with everything else that has happened? What about justice for the victim? Send a message so it finally sinks into these girls and parents' heads that this kind of behavior #1) won't be tolerated and #2) is wrong

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If we leave the school name out of it maybe the thread won't be deleted this time

Seems like the OP got some good information. Not sure why a school would need to be named.

This thread/topic has been posted multiple times this week but keeps getting deleted. (Maybe not the same OP) folks need to take cyber bullying seriously and I hate to see this info disappear because the school involved gets named

Let's not name the name because it does keep getting deleted and I fear the discussion will end as a result. This particular issue was of a girl who was about to go to this new school in the fall. There were over 10 girls involved in making horrible comments about her, etc. The parents have lawyer-ed up and have told the school that they will sue if the school says anything to anyone. Some of the problem girls are going to other schools in the fall and so they have already "graduated" and are beyond the "arm of the law" so to speak. But the parents of the girls who are staying are already threatening to withhold donations, etc. and seem to have a stronghold on the leadership of the school. The board has signaled they expect severe consequences, but ultimately this is a matter for the administration to deal with and, unfortunately, they have not dealt with all the prior instances of similar acts for years....it has been building and building and there is zero leadership. Plus the parents of these girls who were part of this are more concerned with who "leaked" and having to be called in for questioning. It's completely out of control!

I don't understand what the parents could sue the school for? It seems from your description the kids are at fault, not the school.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If we leave the school name out of it maybe the thread won't be deleted this time

Seems like the OP got some good information. Not sure why a school would need to be named.

This thread/topic has been posted multiple times this week but keeps getting deleted. (Maybe not the same OP) folks need to take cyber bullying seriously and I hate to see this info disappear because the school involved gets named

Let's not name the name because it does keep getting deleted and I fear the discussion will end as a result. This particular issue was of a girl who was about to go to this new school in the fall. There were over 10 girls involved in making horrible comments about her, etc. The parents have lawyer-ed up and have told the school that they will sue if the school says anything to anyone. Some of the problem girls are going to other schools in the fall and so they have already "graduated" and are beyond the "arm of the law" so to speak. But the parents of the girls who are staying are already threatening to withhold donations, etc. and seem to have a stronghold on the leadership of the school. The board has signaled they expect severe consequences, but ultimately this is a matter for the administration to deal with and, unfortunately, they have not dealt with all the prior instances of similar acts for years....it has been building and building and there is zero leadership. Plus the parents of these girls who were part of this are more concerned with who "leaked" and having to be called in for questioning. It's completely out of control!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No, the police are not going to help unless there are violent threats. If it's that bad, please just change schools.

Would you say this to a young woman who was raped in college and the school did nothing because he was the QB of the immensely popular (and lucrative) football team and a "hero"? Because then you are making her the victim TWICE. That makes zero sense that the victim of a crime is the one who should leave. I don't understand this reasoning at all.

If I'm sexually harassed at my work place by my boss, should I just find a new job? Again...it's the same thing. When will the person who is at fault be held accountable?

If I'm the parent of a child who has had a disastrous social life at school, then YES, absolutely, it's my job to find my child a better school environment as soon as possible, if other measures (talking with school admin, talking with parents) don't show quick results. And in fact, women who are sexually harassed almost invariably (although not always) find new jobs. That's why their payouts can be so big -- because they pretty much have to quit due to the emotional stress, and they get compensated for lost wages. If there is an ACTUAL crime (unclear if there was here) then of course the perpetrator should face consequences. But that has nothing to do, as a parent, with thinking about whether a different school environment would be better for your kid.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you feel that it constitutes either stalking or harassment, sure, you can consult with an attorney and then possibly go to the police depending on legal advice. In that case, I would send a letter officially notifying the school that you are pursuing legal options to address the stalking/harassment and bullying of your child that the school failed to handle. That might get some attention and get the administration working on solutions.

However, and I know this isn't going to be a popular opinion, in practice I think that in almost all circumstances I would instead advise that your child find a way to toughen up and rise above the unpleasantness. I can't know for sure how I would respond in a truly severe or frightening case but for the fairly mild online unpleasantness my oldest daughter encountered that was what I advised and it worked out alright. I think developing that sort of unflappable and unfailingly graceful attitude is likely a useful life skill for all teens and young adults but especially for young women.

That's great advice, except for the innumerable kids who have taken their lives because of bullying and no doubt many of them got this sort of "buck up!" type of advice. Maybe this is mild online unpleasantness, but please understand that it can be so much more for children who really need strong action on the part of adults to protect them.

I agree with you 100%, but the idea that "strong action" constitutes a police report or civil suit is ludicrous.

Anonymous wrote:No, the police are not going to help unless there are violent threats. If it's that bad, please just change schools.

Would you say this to a young woman who was raped in college and the school did nothing because he was the QB of the immensely popular (and lucrative) football team and a "hero"? Because then you are making her the victim TWICE. That makes zero sense that the victim of a crime is the one who should leave. I don't understand this reasoning at all.

If I'm sexually harassed at my work place by my boss, should I just find a new job? Again...it's the same thing. When will the person who is at fault be held accountable?

Anonymous wrote:If we leave the school name out of it maybe the thread won't be deleted this time

BINGO!!!!!!

Anonymous wrote:Could always try filing a lawsuit for intentional infliction of emotional distress...especially if the perpetrators have money...that seems to be the only thing to get some people's attention. Or even perhaps negligent infliction against the school for not doing anything to stop it. No idea how this would play out, but the lack of merit doesn't seem to be a deterrent to filing a lawsuit these days.

That is pretty terrible advice. Intentional infliction of emotional distress cases are, deliberately, rarely found actionable because of the fear of opening the floodgates. Moreover, a public lawsuit against the school would garner a great deal of publicity -- the parents' names would be public in the suit and the child's name could be figured out easily.

This is not minimizing the seriousness and great potential harm from cyberbullying, just telling you (as most litigators or former litigators will) that litigants are rarely happy with civil litigation as a means of resolving such a dispute -- slow, expensive, public, and burdensome in terms of the discovery you undertake and are subject to.

There are more lawyers working to stop cyberbullying now, however, so it might be worth trying to identify some practitioners in this area and consulting them. If the school is being dismissive to your concerns (not saying that's happening but if it is), a lawyer letter will get their attention plenty fast and is much less expensive and has less collateral damage for you (e.g. No article about your case on the front page of the Post Metro section).

Good luck to your family and very sorry there's a problem. Social media makes growing up in this era terribly complicated.

Anonymous wrote:If you feel that it constitutes either stalking or harassment, sure, you can consult with an attorney and then possibly go to the police depending on legal advice. In that case, I would send a letter officially notifying the school that you are pursuing legal options to address the stalking/harassment and bullying of your child that the school failed to handle. That might get some attention and get the administration working on solutions.

However, and I know this isn't going to be a popular opinion, in practice I think that in almost all circumstances I would instead advise that your child find a way to toughen up and rise above the unpleasantness. I can't know for sure how I would respond in a truly severe or frightening case but for the fairly mild online unpleasantness my oldest daughter encountered that was what I advised and it worked out alright. I think developing that sort of unflappable and unfailingly graceful attitude is likely a useful life skill for all teens and young adults but especially for young women.

That's great advice, except for the innumerable kids who have taken their lives because of bullying and no doubt many of them got this sort of "buck up!" type of advice. Maybe this is mild online unpleasantness, but please understand that it can be so much more for children who really need strong action on the part of adults to protect them.

Is your child being sent threats? Please elaborate on specifics of bullying. Need to know specifics of what it entails to help you.

If you feel that it constitutes either stalking or harassment, sure, you can consult with an attorney and then possibly go to the police depending on legal advice. In that case, I would send a letter officially notifying the school that you are pursuing legal options to address the stalking/harassment and bullying of your child that the school failed to handle. That might get some attention and get the administration working on solutions.

However, and I know this isn't going to be a popular opinion, in practice I think that in almost all circumstances I would instead advise that your child find a way to toughen up and rise above the unpleasantness. I can't know for sure how I would respond in a truly severe or frightening case but for the fairly mild online unpleasantness my oldest daughter encountered that was what I advised and it worked out alright. I think developing that sort of unflappable and unfailingly graceful attitude is likely a useful life skill for all teens and young adults but especially for young women.

Kids make poor decisions all the time...Educators do best if they support the victim and educate the bully. Not just punish...teach.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If we leave the school name out of it maybe the thread won't be deleted this time

Seems like the OP got some good information. Not sure why a school would need to be named.

This thread/topic has been posted multiple times this week but keeps getting deleted. (Maybe not the same OP) folks need to take cyber bullying seriously and I hate to see this info disappear because the school involved gets named

Forgive me for the typos please. This issue touches my heart and I typed quickly from my phone during a quick break.