Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:hi OP, I'm in the same position, with a middle schooler doing very well academically. I have been persuaded through a lot of reading that this diagnosis is usually welcome to the person receiving it. I imagine my son feels different from others, and it could be a relief to know why. I am also inclined to get the diagnosis because I think it will help get his "buy-in" when it comes to learning ways to fit in better socially. As it is, he just feels like there is no point in trying to make friends, because they don't want him. He doesn't understand why, or what he could do differently to be more accepted. I feel like learning these skills will help him for the rest of his life. But I've also been hesitant about getting the diagnosis when he is doing so well, especially with the current concern that people may be denied health insurance if they have a "pre-existing condition!"

I could have written this post. Have a middle school son who also does well academically, but struggles with the social element. His therapist doesn't think he meets the criteria for an official diagnosis (thinks it's mainly severe anxiety) and since we get all the services that we need in school, we haven't sought a formal diagnosis. Still, I wonder from time to time if it would be valuable to have it and it might even give me some peace of mind. DW says it wouldn't change our approach and I get that also. Plus, I think DS wouldn't strongly resist going through the testing process.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Asperger's hasn't existed as a diagnosis since DSM5 came out.

This is 13:41. I'm aware of this, however Aspergers is a more specific term that is useful when talking about the dilemma of whether to diagnose or not. HFA is used fairly broadly to mean a much larger chunk of the spectrum so does not convey the same meaning in this context.