Anonymous
Post 05/14/2017 23:57     Subject: Sleepovers with lesbian identified DD
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I don't think most people would have a problem with teen sex if the possibility of pregnancy wasn't in the equation.

In your scenario it pregnancy isn't a possible outcome.

So do you have a problem with a teen in a mutually agreed upon and safe sexual relationship?


(Not OP) A lot of parents don't feel that kids are ready for sex at 14...and there is no such thing as 100% safe sex. Especially with a young teen's judgement.


No shit. I wouldn't want my 14 year old daughter engaging in oral sex with a male OR female. Even if there's no chance of pregnancy.
Anonymous
Post 05/14/2017 23:55     Subject: Sleepovers with lesbian identified DD
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:DD is 14 and came out to us as gay a few months ago. Totally expected and we're fine. However, how do we handle same-sex friendships and sleepovers. She has friends of both genders and often wants to spend the night at her male friends house because of shared interests. On the same token, she often wants to spend the night with female friends and we don't know how to approach it. I don't like the idea of her staying the night at her male friends house, because although she may not be interested they may be and I'd hate if she was in a position where she had little to no power. Her two best friends are male, and sweet boys (ahem and nerdy) so I trust them more than most boys that age. Thoughts? How will I know if her same sex friends coming over are just friends?


Ask her?


Oh sure. And if she plans on having a night full of hot sex, do you think she would be stupid enough to tell mom she's attracted to her?
Anonymous
Post 05/14/2017 23:53     Subject: Sleepovers with lesbian identified DD
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Err on the side of caution. No to any sleepovers with anyone. There's no need. Friends can come over. She can go over friends' houses. But no sleepovers.

--lesbian mom of 2 teenagers


Seems like the child would be robbed of some quintessential teenage social events because of her sexual orientation.



What other alternative is there?
Anonymous
Post 05/14/2017 19:36     Subject: Sleepovers with lesbian identified DD
I simply asked my daughter if there was anything more than a friendship between them. I was satisfied with the answer and moved on. Her other dear friend is straight.

Most people start having some type of sex in high school. Let's not kid ourselves.
Anonymous
Post 05/13/2017 07:36     Subject: Sleepovers with lesbian identified DD
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Err on the side of caution. No to any sleepovers with anyone. There's no need. Friends can come over. She can go over friends' houses. But no sleepovers.

--lesbian mom of 2 teenagers


Seems like the child would be robbed of some quintessential teenage social events because of her sexual orientation.


Plenty of teens don't do sleepovers.


Really? When I was a teen we did sleepovers all the time. Sometimes at someone's house, and sometimes in the woods since many families owned cabins in the woods where I grew up.
Anonymous
Post 05/12/2017 21:00     Subject: Sleepovers with lesbian identified DD
Anonymous wrote:I don't think most people would have a problem with teen sex if the possibility of pregnancy wasn't in the equation.

In your scenario it pregnancy isn't a possible outcome.

So do you have a problem with a teen in a mutually agreed upon and safe sexual relationship?


Are you kidding? "Most" responsible parents would have a big problem with it, at 14.
Anonymous
Post 05/10/2017 15:11     Subject: Sleepovers with lesbian identified DD
I think a good rule is "no sleepovers with a potential sexual partner." Which can get confusing if a teen is experimenting. Or you could just say " please no sexual activity..." and leave the definitions to them....or "no boom boom in the sleeping bags."
Or, sleep in the same room as them...
Or chastity belts
Or maybe just make sure everyone has a laxative before bedtime, that will kill a sex drive.

Goodness me,
Anonymous
Post 05/10/2017 14:58     Subject: Sleepovers with lesbian identified DD
No to all sleepovers.

As a teen, we used sleepovers to drink heavily. FYI. So there mayb e other benefits to no sleepovers.
Anonymous
Post 05/10/2017 14:53     Subject: Sleepovers with lesbian identified DD
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Err on the side of caution. No to any sleepovers with anyone. There's no need. Friends can come over. She can go over friends' houses. But no sleepovers.

--lesbian mom of 2 teenagers


Seems like the child would be robbed of some quintessential teenage social events because of her sexual orientation.


"Sexual orientation" at 14? Please.


i knew I was straight at 14. no different


True but barring molestation you don't know if you got for the other team until probably 16 and lots of therapy


Please STFU with your ignorance and obvious trolling.
Anonymous
Post 05/10/2017 13:09     Subject: Sleepovers with lesbian identified DD
Anonymous wrote:This has come up before. The way I dealt with it (DD identifies as Bi) is to be blind. Seriously. I am not really concerned with sex with a BFF -- I do not think it will happened. But, the down-side repercussions are not a big deal: STD's are really not much of an issue, and pregnancy is a non-started.

I am concerned about the emotional issues, but there is no way to stop them anyway (if they want to), and I do not think DD's BFF is into girls.
You sound uninformed and I think your way of dealing with your situation sounds reckless and dangerous. My SIL is living with an STD and I can tell you that it is a very big deal and has not only had a major impact on her sexual life but her emotional state as well. BTW, the new terminology is STIs.

And to the other poster that said most people wouldnt have a problem with teen sex if pregnancy weren't an issue. WRONG. IMO, contracting a STI has the potential to more damaging and crippling then a teenage pregnancy.
Anonymous
Post 05/08/2017 20:41     Subject: Re:Sleepovers with lesbian identified DD
No experience or advice, other than, have you asked your DD what she is comfortable with? Let her know you believe she is too young for sex and are concerned about same sex sleepovers. Start the conversation. I also believe 14 is too young for sex, but I am sure 14-year olds are experimenting. Maybe there is a counselor specializing in LBGTQ issues who may have some advice?
Anonymous
Post 05/08/2017 20:35     Subject: Sleepovers with lesbian identified DD
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Err on the side of caution. No to any sleepovers with anyone. There's no need. Friends can come over. She can go over friends' houses. But no sleepovers.

--lesbian mom of 2 teenagers


Seems like the child would be robbed of some quintessential teenage social events because of her sexual orientation.


"Sexual orientation" at 14? Please.


i knew I was straight at 14. no different


True but barring molestation you don't know if you got for the other team until probably 16 and lots of therapy
Anonymous
Post 05/08/2017 20:32     Subject: Sleepovers with lesbian identified DD
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Err on the side of caution. No to any sleepovers with anyone. There's no need. Friends can come over. She can go over friends' houses. But no sleepovers.

--lesbian mom of 2 teenagers


Seems like the child would be robbed of some quintessential teenage social events because of her sexual orientation.


"Sexual orientation" at 14? Please.


i knew I was straight at 14. no different
Anonymous
Post 05/08/2017 20:19     Subject: Sleepovers with lesbian identified DD
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Err on the side of caution. No to any sleepovers with anyone. There's no need. Friends can come over. She can go over friends' houses. But no sleepovers.

--lesbian mom of 2 teenagers


Seems like the child would be robbed of some quintessential teenage social events because of her sexual orientation.


"Sexual orientation" at 14? Please.
Anonymous
Post 05/08/2017 07:58     Subject: Sleepovers with lesbian identified DD
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Err on the side of caution. No to any sleepovers with anyone. There's no need. Friends can come over. She can go over friends' houses. But no sleepovers.

--lesbian mom of 2 teenagers


Seems like the child would be robbed of some quintessential teenage social events because of her sexual orientation.


Plenty of teens don't do sleepovers.