Anonymous wrote:I think you have set up a false dichotomy of either trust or suspect of cheating. What you instead need to realize is that everyone is human, everyone makes mistakes, and things happen in life that you cannot prevent.

Do you trust yourself that you won't cheat?

I have no plans or desire to cheat, but who knows.
Hasn't crossed my mind to cheat on him in 20 years so,..
But you never know. I would never put myself in a risky situation. Like getting drunk and going out etc

Anonymous wrote:OP, you are damaged. Your DH is correct.

I'm a man married for 18years and never have and never will cheat. Not all men are out of control dogs. I'm sorry you have suffered some deep trauma.

I have suffered no trauma. Thanks for playing.

Because men are trash. In other news, sky is blue, bear shits in the woods.

OP, you are damaged. Your DH is correct.

I'm a man married for 18years and never have and never will cheat. Not all men are out of control dogs. I'm sorry you have suffered some deep trauma.

I think you are absolutely right op. Of course the handmaidens are up in arms, "how can you say that?! Men are just as trustworthy as women!!! How sexist!!" But statistics reveal that to not be the case.

Good for you for protecting yourself

I don't completely trust anyone. I thought that was normal.

I think you have set up a false dichotomy of either trust or suspect of cheating. What you instead need to realize is that everyone is human, everyone makes mistakes, and things happen in life that you cannot prevent.

Do you trust yourself that you won't cheat?

Anonymous wrote:New poster here. I am almost 31 and in a somewhat new relationship. In my last relationship, my ex ended up being a serial cheater, liar, and manipulator.
I truly don't think I'll ever fully trust again. The man I am dating now has given me zero reason to suspect anything but I'm already thinking about taking a glance at his phone.

Completely wrong, I know. I don't want to be like this.

I just accept that everyone has the potential to cheat. Every man, most women, want to cheat. It's just human nature. You can do things in a relationship to make it more or less likely your partner will cheat, but they still might cheat. Just enjoy the relationship.

Female here. Can only speak for myself. For most of my adult life I thought I was a cheater, unable to control my impulses. I hated myself for this. But now 12 years into an extremely sexually fulfilling relationship I have not any impulse to cheat and don't think this will change. So perhaps I was programmed all along for monogamy and just needed the right partner.
My DH on the otherhand is just as happy as I am with our sex life, seems to be completely in love with me and crazy attracted to me. But unfortunately this does not stop him from cheating. He is most definitely preprogrammed to cheat. It completely sucks. And yeah I am fully aware that this is my karma. Still breaks my heart though.

Anonymous wrote:Lifetime monogamy isn't a realistic expectation. So, no, I don't trust my spouse or any person I would date or marry to never cheat. I get what OP is saying.

For me, it's more about being realistic. If my spouse cheats, then what? Do I throw away my marriage over it?

It isn't a realistic expectation for you. I am quite happy without a partner.

I'm with you. Every woman says "I never saw it coming." But it obviously happens to someone. Why shouldn't that person be you?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I think you have serious issues. I have been married for almost 30 years. It has never one time occurred to me that my DH might cheat. I have literally never considered that possibility. Could it happen? I guess it could. A meteor could also fall on my house but I don't look up every time I walk out the door.

Get therapy.

Wake up. You sound so naive.

And you sound like a bitter, ugly person.

Anonymous wrote:OP, I think you have serious issues. I have been married for almost 30 years. It has never one time occurred to me that my DH might cheat. I have literally never considered that possibility. Could it happen? I guess it could. A meteor could also fall on my house but I don't look up every time I walk out the door.

Get therapy.

Wake up. You sound so naive.

OP, I think you have serious issues. I have been married for almost 30 years. It has never one time occurred to me that my DH might cheat. I have literally never considered that possibility. Could it happen? I guess it could. A meteor could also fall on my house but I don't look up every time I walk out the door.

Get therapy.

Anonymous wrote:you have a daddy issue, op.

I DONt at all. My parents were married happily for 45 years. My dad never so much looked at another woman. He was a very Christian man, he read the bible at night. He has died.