OP - It really seems the key will be to find a psychiatrist for a complete evaluation. Be sure you schedule a visit with the doctor or put down in writing a history of how DS got to where he is. Positive reenforcement is needed and though frustration is high understand he really may need medication as the first step to moving forward. Let him know you all want to figure out hat is up and to help him. I echo the posters who say the psychiatrist and therapist must be able to work together by having regular contact. A medical doctor can be the one to best evaluate he need for a day therapeutic program. Hang in there.

We offer rewards to get our son to go to therapy and we also tell him it's required so no hanging out with friends or allowance if he doesn't. We also bribe him with money or going out to dinner. I'm totally fine with it - therapy is hard and we want him to go. Both works for us. Also, for some reason, he is more willing to go with my DH instead of DW so we try that.

Anonymous wrote:Question for those who have dealt with this type of thing. How do you get your child to agree to see the therapist or psychiatrist? Our DS routinely refuses to go. He won't even get in the car. We take things away (tv, computer, phone) but nothing seems to phase him. I hate to say but should we offer him rewards for going. We want him to get the help he needs but are at a loss.

Having been through this, I would strongly recommend some reading up on positive parenting strategies and techniques. The taking away things approach actually made our situation worse. Trying to understand the world as he sees it will help (even if that world doesn't make sense to you). Maybe look at family counseling rather than counseling for just him, it will help you even if he is not wanting to go.

OP you might post on the Special Needs forum. A lot of experience over there with behavior and anger mgmt problems and treatment options. Seems early for inpatient.

Yes reward him! Kids who are depressed have low motivation. Rewards are highly recommended by our cognitive behavioral therapist (CBT). And that's the kind of therapist he should have (or DBT) in addition to psychiatrist.

Absolutely bribe. We did a combination of taking away - no internet or TV in the house, cell phone cut off, and then paid him for making it to each appointment. The hope is that eventually he will start to feel better and will be more willing to go.

Question for those who have dealt with this type of thing. How do you get your child to agree to see the therapist or psychiatrist? Our DS routinely refuses to go. He won't even get in the car. We take things away (tv, computer, phone) but nothing seems to phase him. I hate to say but should we offer him rewards for going. We want him to get the help he needs but are at a loss.

Anonymous wrote:The Roundhouse Center in Alexandria. Our son receives CBT directly from his psychiatrist (rather than a separate therapist), in addition to medication.
Just FYI, after we had to do an ER visit, we learned that many practice groups around here won't see a patient who has been hospitalized. (Was not an issue for Roundhouse.) Technically, our son wasn't hospitalized, so it wasn't disqualifying, but we didn't think we should be working with a practice group that couldn't handle more significant mental illness.

Why won't they take a kid on if he has previously been hospitalized?

Dr. Novitsky:

http://www.potomacpsychiatry.com/psychiatric-staff

http://www.bethesdapediatrics.com/referrals/psychiatry

Here are some good recommendations.

Anonymous wrote:OP--

Is he biological or adopted? Our adopted son had similar issues. Turned out to be undiagnosed and previously unknown FASD.
He too was able to keep it together at school but not at home.

Biological.

OP--

Is he biological or adopted? Our adopted son had similar issues. Turned out to be undiagnosed and previously unknown FASD.
He too was able to keep it together at school but not at home.

The Roundhouse Center in Alexandria. Our son receives CBT directly from his psychiatrist (rather than a separate therapist), in addition to medication.
Just FYI, after we had to do an ER visit, we learned that many practice groups around here won't see a patient who has been hospitalized. (Was not an issue for Roundhouse.) Technically, our son wasn't hospitalized, so it wasn't disqualifying, but we didn't think we should be working with a practice group that couldn't handle more significant mental illness.

Psychiatrists-Family and child counseling in fairfax

Child and Family Counseling group in VA (Vienna).