Anonymous
Post 10/05/2016 17:10     Subject: Uncomfortable religious situations you were forced into
Anonymous wrote:Room mother in Catholic school started speaking in tongues during a prayer circle.


Speaking in tongues is not generally a Catholic thing.

Was she a charismatic Catholic? That seemd to be a thing during the late 70s-early 80s.
Anonymous
Post 10/05/2016 17:03     Subject: Uncomfortable religious situations you were forced into
Anonymous wrote:My parents weren't regular church goers when I was growing up, so a lot of my friend's parents would invite me over on Saturday night, and remind me to bring a nice outfit because "maybe we'll go out for pancakes in the morning!" or some garbage like that. Never got the pancakes, always got taken to various churches where I didn't know the traditions and had no idea what to do. But over time I got better at faking it, so I do think it helped me to be very aware of social cues. In high school, even kids who didn't like me would invite me to their "youth festivals" or whatever their new member recruitment event was. Baptists were the most aggressive; Jewish kids mercifully didn't pull these stunts.

I'm an atheist now, but I still like pancakes.


Yeah, we were NEVER talked to about recruiting fresh meat. Honestly, if anyone ever invited you to temple, it was because they had to go and wanted someone who was a friend there, to make it more fun. I spent many a Friday night huddled in the coat closet petting fur coats rich ladies had had their husbands hang for them, and giggling with other kids who'd also escaped the service.
Anonymous
Post 10/05/2016 16:52     Subject: Uncomfortable religious situations you were forced into
my best friend growing up had a very religious family, There were several odd occurrences that I just didn't understand until I got a little older. There were certain rules that only applied to me (I was a tom boy, and my best friends were boys) and at the age of 7, I was treated like I was going to do something sexual behind closed doors and was forbidden from playing upstairs in a bedroom (though at the time I had no idea why I wasn't allowed and my other friends were...)

The worst was they had attended a pro-life event and brought home signs, and I wasn't old enough to know what abortion was so they explained it to me in a way that was very manipulative and then had us marching around the neighborhood with their signs. My parents were horrified and weren't happy they had to discuss it with me at that age.

The mom also told me that Santa wasn't real and she had seen a demon in their house. They left public schools for home schooling and moved away.
Anonymous
Post 10/05/2016 16:35     Subject: Uncomfortable religious situations you were forced into
Anonymous wrote:I am a nurse. Every morning at 0700 during a mandatory morning huddle, I have to listen to a prayer (or pray, that's the other option). The prayer varies by the day and is never a generic "lord, let us do good, amen" sort of affair. Always very long, detailed, and packed with extremely reverent and humble offerings to a specific deity.

I cannot opt out of morning huddle and I cannot just pop in and out for the prayer part because it's sandwiched in between concrete medical information I must have for the day.

This is at a hospital that is VERY loosely affiliated with a particular religion and so my recourse is to quit. If it was a state hospital — say, the Univ. of Maryland Medical Center in Baltimore — I'd take a different approach to this uncomfortable situation. But because a particular religion founded this hospital 140 years ago, that's their basis for forcing prayer in 2016 although nothing in their mission statement, etc, has anything to do w. religion at this time.


Wow. I am so sorry. Surely there is some rule against even a private hospital enforcing this prayer on everyone?
Anonymous
Post 10/05/2016 16:32     Subject: Uncomfortable religious situations you were forced into
I am a nurse. Every morning at 0700 during a mandatory morning huddle, I have to listen to a prayer (or pray, that's the other option). The prayer varies by the day and is never a generic "lord, let us do good, amen" sort of affair. Always very long, detailed, and packed with extremely reverent and humble offerings to a specific deity.

I cannot opt out of morning huddle and I cannot just pop in and out for the prayer part because it's sandwiched in between concrete medical information I must have for the day.

This is at a hospital that is VERY loosely affiliated with a particular religion and so my recourse is to quit. If it was a state hospital — say, the Univ. of Maryland Medical Center in Baltimore — I'd take a different approach to this uncomfortable situation. But because a particular religion founded this hospital 140 years ago, that's their basis for forcing prayer in 2016 although nothing in their mission statement, etc, has anything to do w. religion at this time.
Anonymous
Post 10/05/2016 16:30     Subject: Uncomfortable religious situations you were forced into
My parents weren't regular church goers when I was growing up, so a lot of my friend's parents would invite me over on Saturday night, and remind me to bring a nice outfit because "maybe we'll go out for pancakes in the morning!" or some garbage like that. Never got the pancakes, always got taken to various churches where I didn't know the traditions and had no idea what to do. But over time I got better at faking it, so I do think it helped me to be very aware of social cues. In high school, even kids who didn't like me would invite me to their "youth festivals" or whatever their new member recruitment event was. Baptists were the most aggressive; Jewish kids mercifully didn't pull these stunts.

I'm an atheist now, but I still like pancakes.
Anonymous
Post 10/05/2016 16:28     Subject: Uncomfortable religious situations you were forced into
Anonymous wrote:I mean, were they all child molesters at this church, op? Did they force you to handle snakes?

I would have been uncomfortable, too. But unless you feared for your safety, so what? You were uncomfortable for a few days. I dont understand why you think this was such an unacceptable thing for them to do. Bringing a friend to church while they were under my parents care is exactly what my own parents did and what most other parents I knew did. Uncomfortable, sure. Egregious, not really.


People do not need to be dripping blood in order to feel like they have been mistreated.

People do not need to have been molested (WTF?!) in order to feel invaded, made uncomfortable, or otherwise violated.

Bringing someone to your place of worship when they do not follow your faith is absolutely rude and invasive, unless you make it clear to them that, "We're just making sure you're safe and not alone, feel free to read a book in another area of the church while we are at service."

It's really not hard to respect other people's boundaries. Really. If you are a halfway decent and respectful human being, you will know how to do this.
Anonymous
Post 10/05/2016 16:27     Subject: Uncomfortable religious situations you were forced into
Anonymous wrote:I mean, were they all child molesters at this church, op? Did they force you to handle snakes?

I would have been uncomfortable, too. But unless you feared for your safety, so what? You were uncomfortable for a few days. I dont understand why you think this was such an unacceptable thing for them to do. Bringing a friend to church while they were under my parents care is exactly what my own parents did and what most other parents I knew did. Uncomfortable, sure. Egregious, not really.


Would they ask the friend first? I think there is a difference when a child is a certain age. Like if the child is 6-10 I don't even think you would ask-but I think after that its at least polite to ask if they are ok with it. I also think church is one thing, making a teenager go to the "teen bible study" is going too far and then making the teenager go again on a different day after they said they were uncomfortable is taking it WAY too far.
Anonymous
Post 10/05/2016 16:26     Subject: Re:Uncomfortable religious situations you were forced into
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:And to this day in your grown up skin you still feel uncomfortable about the situation ?

You need a hobby. It's not like you were tortured.


+1

This family was doing you, and/or your mom, a FAVOR, OP. Are you so ungracious for their hospitality that this is what you remember?


Seriously what the fuck - someone hosting your kid does NOT give them the right to haul your kid to their church multiple times, force the kid to attend a bible study on top of that, and then ask him/her what he/she thought. Are you fucking serious? This is not some version of hotel payment - "We give you a bed, you give your soul to Jesus." PP was NOT obliged to observe their religion and in fact, doing that to the PP was genuinely invasive. I would remember it with discomfort too.


Really? Then perhaps mama should have made other arrangements, or thought about this first. The family has a right to practice whatever religion they want. If kids are there, they go to church with us, too. That's certainly the rule in our house.


Ew. I am disgusted by people like you. Just ew. I need to take a shower after that display of religious intolerance. I hope to God nobody of another religion ever lets you near their kids.
Anonymous
Post 10/05/2016 16:25     Subject: Uncomfortable religious situations you were forced into
Anonymous wrote:I mean, were they all child molesters at this church, op? Did they force you to handle snakes?

I would have been uncomfortable, too. But unless you feared for your safety, so what? You were uncomfortable for a few days. I dont understand why you think this was such an unacceptable thing for them to do. Bringing a friend to church while they were under my parents care is exactly what my own parents did and what most other parents I knew did. Uncomfortable, sure. Egregious, not really.


Would they ask the friend first? I think there is a difference when a child is a certain age. Like if the child is 6-10 I don't even think you would ask-but I think after that its at least polite to ask if they are ok with it. I also think church is one thing, making a teenager go to the "teen bible study" is going too far and then making the teenager go again on a different day after they said they were uncomfortable is taking it WAY too far.
Anonymous
Post 10/05/2016 16:22     Subject: Uncomfortable religious situations you were forced into
I mean, were they all child molesters at this church, op? Did they force you to handle snakes?

I would have been uncomfortable, too. But unless you feared for your safety, so what? You were uncomfortable for a few days. I dont understand why you think this was such an unacceptable thing for them to do. Bringing a friend to church while they were under my parents care is exactly what my own parents did and what most other parents I knew did. Uncomfortable, sure. Egregious, not really.
Anonymous
Post 10/05/2016 16:17     Subject: Uncomfortable religious situations you were forced into
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:When I was in college, I went for a weekend visit to my close friend's home (same floor as me in our dorm) because her hometown was a one-hour drive from campus. I knew she was Christian, but I didn't know how fucking Christian. She wanted to take me to church and decided to pick out a progressive Church with a rock band (?) in order to give me a better inroad to Jesus or something, instead of her parents' very staid, we-are-wealthy-Protestants-who-burn-for-Jesus congregation.

Never asked me if I wanted to go. I was too timid to say I didn't want to go, plus I thought that somehow I would come off as the religiously intolerant one if I said no to attending her church. Worst part was, she knew how much I wasn't interested in Christianity and that I enjoyed my own private spirituality.


Oh jeez, those rock and roll churches always made me the MOST uncomfortable. I felt so silly, dorky, and embarrassed for them. I grew up Catholic, and definitely have always preferred a more traditional service (even as a teen). Those churches always an obnoxious youth pastor. Nothing worse than an over enthusiastic young adult trying to prove how much they click with the kids.


+1000. These churches are the worst. Remind of the younglife organization (which deserves its own thread to be talked about). I feel like those churches try to portray this whole "young and popular" Christianity vibe that just goes in a very different direction.
Anonymous
Post 10/05/2016 16:10     Subject: Re:Uncomfortable religious situations you were forced into
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:And to this day in your grown up skin you still feel uncomfortable about the situation ?

You need a hobby. It's not like you were tortured.


+1

This family was doing you, and/or your mom, a FAVOR, OP. Are you so ungracious for their hospitality that this is what you remember?


Wow. Just Wow. I was a teenager. There were no diapers to change and we went to the same school and soccer practice (so its not like they had to go out of their way). So because they were doing me a "favor" its ok that they forced me to go to their church and bible study even after I said I was uncomfortable?
Anonymous
Post 10/05/2016 16:08     Subject: Re:Uncomfortable religious situations you were forced into
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:And to this day in your grown up skin you still feel uncomfortable about the situation ?

You need a hobby. It's not like you were tortured.


+1

This family was doing you, and/or your mom, a FAVOR, OP. Are you so ungracious for their hospitality that this is what you remember?


Seriously what the fuck - someone hosting your kid does NOT give them the right to haul your kid to their church multiple times, force the kid to attend a bible study on top of that, and then ask him/her what he/she thought. Are you fucking serious? This is not some version of hotel payment - "We give you a bed, you give your soul to Jesus." PP was NOT obliged to observe their religion and in fact, doing that to the PP was genuinely invasive. I would remember it with discomfort too.


Really? Then perhaps mama should have made other arrangements, or thought about this first. The family has a right to practice whatever religion they want. If kids are there, they go to church with us, too. That's certainly the rule in our house.
Anonymous
Post 10/05/2016 16:06     Subject: Re:Uncomfortable religious situations you were forced into
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:And to this day in your grown up skin you still feel uncomfortable about the situation ?

You need a hobby. It's not like you were tortured.


+1

This family was doing you, and/or your mom, a FAVOR, OP. Are you so ungracious for their hospitality that this is what you remember?


Seriously what the fuck - someone hosting your kid does NOT give them the right to haul your kid to their church multiple times, force the kid to attend a bible study on top of that, and then ask him/her what he/she thought. Are you fucking serious? This is not some version of hotel payment - "We give you a bed, you give your soul to Jesus." PP was NOT obliged to observe their religion and in fact, doing that to the PP was genuinely invasive. I would remember it with discomfort too.