Anonymous
Post 08/30/2016 09:31     Subject: Mother refused to order take out unless I called in the order
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:She didn't want to for whatever reason. She was probably embarrassed or intimidated, or hates yelling an order at someone in a loud busy restaurant. You should have just done it


But (If I read the post correctly) she didn't even want OP's Husband to order it. She only wanted her daughter (OP) to order. That's odd.


And OP was at work, while DH was at home (I think).
Anonymous
Post 08/30/2016 09:22     Subject: Mother refused to order take out unless I called in the order
Anonymous wrote:She didn't want to for whatever reason. She was probably embarrassed or intimidated, or hates yelling an order at someone in a loud busy restaurant. You should have just done it


But (If I read the post correctly) she didn't even want OP's Husband to order it. She only wanted her daughter (OP) to order. That's odd.
Anonymous
Post 08/30/2016 08:33     Subject: Mother refused to order take out unless I called in the order
She didn't want to for whatever reason. She was probably embarrassed or intimidated, or hates yelling an order at someone in a loud busy restaurant. You should have just done it
Anonymous
Post 08/30/2016 08:31     Subject: Mother refused to order take out unless I called in the order
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Was she just trying to control you, or was she intimidated to call in the order and thought you'd get her order right while your husband might not?

I'm having a hard time understanding why you picked this hill to die on.


I'm having a hard time understanding why you'd let people walk all over you.


If my guest said they'd feel more comfortable if I did something, and it'd take me minimal time/effort/money, I'd do it.

Yes, if someone asked politely, but OP's mom didn't do that she demanded OP call it in, and said she'd only pay if OP called for some bizarre reason. Some weird control issue. Time for mom to go home.
Anonymous
Post 08/30/2016 08:21     Subject: Mother refused to order take out unless I called in the order
If grandma didn't want to do it, but let the dh do it then that is completely understandable. Some people freeze up on the phone. The fact that she dangled paying for it unless her daughter called is just bizarre.
Anonymous
Post 08/30/2016 08:15     Subject: Mother refused to order take out unless I called in the order
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OK, people. Not everything you don't like is abuse LOL

OP, I'm tempted to chuck this up to a misunderstanding of some sort. Is there something you're not telling us? Your side of the story is bizarre, but there are more sides to this story, I'm sure.


Chalk, not "chuck."
Doesn't seem like a misunderstanding to me. Seems like OPs mom wanted to exercise control just for the heck of it.


There is usually slightly more to the motives than "for the heck of it." "Accepting she's crazy" is one way to deal for sure.
Anonymous
Post 08/30/2016 08:11     Subject: Mother refused to order take out unless I called in the order
Wow, you guys are just alike.
Anonymous
Post 08/30/2016 08:09     Subject: Mother refused to order take out unless I called in the order
Anonymous wrote:OK, people. Not everything you don't like is abuse LOL

OP, I'm tempted to chuck this up to a misunderstanding of some sort. Is there something you're not telling us? Your side of the story is bizarre, but there are more sides to this story, I'm sure.


Chalk, not "chuck."
Doesn't seem like a misunderstanding to me. Seems like OPs mom wanted to exercise control just for the heck of it.
Anonymous
Post 08/30/2016 08:07     Subject: Mother refused to order take out unless I called in the order
She's slightly insane. Just accept that she is slightly insane and make your choices from there. Give up trying to make sense of it. It will never make sense.
Anonymous
Post 08/30/2016 08:00     Subject: Mother refused to order take out unless I called in the order
OK, people. Not everything you don't like is abuse LOL

OP, I'm tempted to chuck this up to a misunderstanding of some sort. Is there something you're not telling us? Your side of the story is bizarre, but there are more sides to this story, I'm sure.
Anonymous
Post 08/30/2016 07:51     Subject: Re:Mother refused to order take out unless I called in the order
Weird behavior. Definitely manipulative. Also OP wasn't claiming this behavior as abusive.
Anonymous
Post 08/29/2016 22:15     Subject: Re:Mother refused to order take out unless I called in the order
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP, good for you for standing up to her.

The people attacking you here have never had to deal with an abusive parent.


If she is abusive, you don't invite her into your home.

Period.


+1

OP's mom sounds quirky.

An abusive parent (I have one)? No. OP basically said that this is indicative of how her mother treated her when she was young. Compared to having garbage dumped on your bed, being slapped in the face, and being threatened with death (actually abusive behavior), this is just tame, normal family dysfunction. Ho-hum power games and manufactured drama.

And yeah, if your parent was actually abusive, you would never, EVER allow them to stay in your house for WEEKS.

OP should have handled this like an adult and asked her mother why it had to be her that ordered it, then explained why she found that silly or irritating. And if OP's mom really, really just needed her to order it (who knows -- anxiety, OCD, etc?), well, she was paying for it. OP could always just buy her own food. Or ask her mom to leave.
Anonymous
Post 08/29/2016 22:09     Subject: Re:Mother refused to order take out unless I called in the order
Time for your mother to go home! Not just because of the length of stay but because you let something like that eat at you. Both of you need a break.
Anonymous
Post 08/29/2016 21:48     Subject: Re:Mother refused to order take out unless I called in the order
Anonymous wrote:OP, good for you for standing up to her.

The people attacking you here have never had to deal with an abusive parent.


If she is abusive, you don't invite her into your home.

Period.
Anonymous
Post 08/29/2016 21:43     Subject: Re:Mother refused to order take out unless I called in the order
OP, good for you for standing up to her.

The people attacking you here have never had to deal with an abusive parent.