Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a follow on question: Thinking of having my 3rd. I am now 41 but would like to wait until 42 (due to current preschool expenses). My OB said every year I wait pregnancy can become more difficult. For those with experience does a year or two really matter?

Absolutely a year or two will matter. At 41, time is not on your side. Don't wait.
Put the new preschool bills on your card.

Yes they can matter. A year or two at your age is like 5-10 years on your thirties. I say this as someone who is pregnant with #3 at 43. Go for it now you will figure out the bills.

Anonymous wrote:I have a follow on question: Thinking of having my 3rd. I am now 41 but would like to wait until 42 (due to current preschool expenses). My OB said every year I wait pregnancy can become more difficult. For those with experience does a year or two really matter?

Holy crap, no don't wait. Every month matters, never mind years. I got lucky and had two kids in my forties, but that was with obsessing over ttc for years. Acupuncture, supplements, iui, IVF, timing, temps, cm checks, miscarriages in between. If you want a third, try now, and count your blessings if you're lucky enough to have daycare expenses overlap with preschool.

If you're in the DC area then having a child at 40 will be pretty unremarkable. I had mine at 44 and am astonished at how little I stand out.

For the person considering waiting at 41. Don't.

Consider going directly to an RE and getting help if you don't get pregnant within three months. You could be horribly upset at the rapid decline in fertility in your 40's. There are exceptions, but the norm is precipitous drop off in fertility. And I speak from experience - it wasn't by choice that I was 44 when I had my kids - it took me three years to get there.

My grandmother had her 3rd kid at 44. In 1946. This is hardly something new!