Good God. It's 7:30, and they're all older kids. It isn't midnight. Let it go. And who said he is going to be mad with the kids while they're out?

OP, you should have daytime help, or camp. Just because you technically don't HAVE to because you're self employed, doesn't mean it isn't in your best interest (and that of your customers/clients.)

Can you afford a PT sitter, OP?

I find myself doing grocery shopping when the kids are on bed. So, I'm at Wegmans sometimes at 10pm.
I'd rather be unwinding, but it's just easier than lugging the kids and I can concentrate better.

Anonymous wrote:You have more kids then you can handle.

+ 1.

Have they come home yet?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He can get as mad as he wants....fuss + fume away, but it was wrong of him to involve the kids.

They are not pawns that he can use for his power trip. Temper tantrums are for little boys.

Let him cool down and yourself as well.

Then if he still doesn't "get" how important it is for you to have some down time every now & then, tell him you will hire a 1-2x week babysitter and he will pay for it.

She should pay for it. Wait- she can't. Ask your husband, OP, or get a job.

She does have a job-- She owns her own business. Can you read?

Anonymous wrote:He can get as mad as he wants....fuss + fume away, but it was wrong of him to involve the kids.

They are not pawns that he can use for his power trip. Temper tantrums are for little boys.

Let him cool down and yourself as well.

Then if he still doesn't "get" how important it is for you to have some down time every now & then, tell him you will hire a 1-2x week babysitter and he will pay for it.

She should pay for it. Wait- she can't. Ask your husband, OP, or get a job.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm with you, but if he had a long day and is suddenly saddled with solo bedtime, I can see why he would be annoyed.

So, he's taking his anger out on the kids by taking them out when it's their bed time, especially the 5 yr old, just to prove a point? And then, if the 5 yr old is cranky while out, will he get mad at the 5 yr old? Poor kid.

+1

+100

Using children like pawns in a tiff with your wife is really immature.

I'm the first PP. I agree with you both 100%. Total douche asshole move to punish her by doing something detrimental to the kids. (Plus he stupidly proves her point that he can't handle parenting like she does.)

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm with you, but if he had a long day and is suddenly saddled with solo bedtime, I can see why he would be annoyed.

So, he's taking his anger out on the kids by taking them out when it's their bed time, especially the 5 yr old, just to prove a point? And then, if the 5 yr old is cranky while out, will he get mad at the 5 yr old? Poor kid.

+1

+100

Using children like pawns in a tiff with your wife is really immature.

He can get as mad as he wants....fuss + fume away, but it was wrong of him to involve the kids.

They are not pawns that he can use for his power trip. Temper tantrums are for little boys.

Let him cool down and yourself as well.

Then if he still doesn't "get" how important it is for you to have some down time every now & then, tell him you will hire a 1-2x week babysitter and he will pay for it.

I don't know, OP. It sounds like he seriously overreacted in a way that was detrimental to the kids and you have a right to be annoyed about that. However, as someone who works long hours, I would not want to come home and immediately be left in charge of putting 5 kids to bed on my own, so perhaps he was just feeling burnt out and irritable.

I'm with the posters that say that it's ridiculous and bad parenting and bad spousing to let things get to this point. This is why some of us have nannies, pay for camps, and use kids nights out and babysitters. You're being a martyr here and then taking out all your bad feelings on your partner. Come up with a solution that does not involving piling more onto his or your plate, i.e. locate yourself a 3rd party solution.

You have more kids then you can handle.

Get a nanny.

Sounds like you and your husband rarely spend any time together. Do you still live the guy?