Have you considered saving a little less for college (like, the $30 it costs for ice cream) so that your kids can live a little now and enjoy their summers? If that's what you're doing with your money so their education can be paid for, I don't think not putting in $30 so they can have ice cream now will hurt them when it comes time for them to go to college.

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Before everyone else piles on, let me add that I am a single parent who scrapes together the money for summer camp. I drive an old car, wear old clothes and bring a lunch I pack every day to a job where I am underpaid. My budget simply does not allow for $30 a week for ice cream at camp.

Some of you assume that I am denying my children something I was given (we ate ice cream at home, not from the ice cream truck). My parents, who were not wealthy, saved to pay for four years of college and most of my professional education as well. That is my priority for my children as well.

And no, I am not the same mom whose kid spent $18 on a lunch at the museum.

But flame away. I wish you could walk a mile in my worn down shoes.

Ok. That's a different story and you didn't include that. Can you tell them they can have icecream with you at home on Friday? Make it special even if it's cheaper. Like make your own Sundays with cherries and sprinkles etc. talk it up and make it something they can look forward to to take the sting off not eating icecream at camp with everyone.
With them and the money I'd focus on them taking $ from a friend without knowing they could pay the friend back. Don't admonish, just talk.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How sad your kids can't have ice cream in the summer with their friends. Makes me sad for them.

OMG I agree.
OP you sound nasty. Why are you so cheap? They want ice cream, it's summer. You probably have them so controlled, they wanted some fun.

Seriously, some people here are either trolls of out of touch.

OP, my mom was a single mom who scraped and couldn't afford these perks either. The little things add up. Just let it go but explain how hard it is to have to pay for these extras. It's not that you don't want them to have ice cream but that you can't afford it.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think you're wrong here. I think you need to unclench. It's summer. They're 7 and 9. They are watching all the kids around them eating ice cream, and they're supposed to ... just stand there and say "I'm abstaining."?

If what they want to spend money on is ice cream, why can't they do that? It's SUMMER. Summer should be fun.

+1. OP has completely forgotten what it is like to be a kid. You are raising children, not Suzi Orman. Give them an allowance and let them manage their own money.

Lol

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Before everyone else piles on, let me add that I am a single parent who scrapes together the money for summer camp. I drive an old car, wear old clothes and bring a lunch I pack every day to a job where I am underpaid. My budget simply does not allow for $30 a week for ice cream at camp.

Some of you assume that I am denying my children something I was given (we ate ice cream at home, not from the ice cream truck). My parents, who were not wealthy, saved to pay for four years of college and most of my professional education as well. That is my priority for my children as well.

And no, I am not the same mom whose kid spent $18 on a lunch at the museum.

But flame away. I wish you could walk a mile in my worn down shoes.

I suggested this is fake. If you are poor then you need to tell your kids, "we are poor and cannot afford it." Being broke is different than teaching want vs. need, OP. But if you sit down and say, if I give you money everyday for ice cream we cannot afford to have dinner.

As a side note, I grew up poor and had to pay for my college myself. I got scholarships. You should worry about retirement NOT college because their are no scholarships or loans for you to retire. As a single parent, your kids will get financial aid too.

Anonymous wrote:How sad your kids can't have ice cream in the summer with their friends. Makes me sad for them.

OMG I agree.
OP you sound nasty. Why are you so cheap? They want ice cream, it's summer. You probably have them so controlled, they wanted some fun.

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Before everyone else piles on, let me add that I am a single parent who scrapes together the money for summer camp. I drive an old car, wear old clothes and bring a lunch I pack every day to a job where I am underpaid. My budget simply does not allow for $30 a week for ice cream at camp.

Some of you assume that I am denying my children something I was given (we ate ice cream at home, not from the ice cream truck). My parents, who were not wealthy, saved to pay for four years of college and most of my professional education as well. That is my priority for my children as well.

And no, I am not the same mom whose kid spent $18 on a lunch at the museum.

But flame away. I wish you could walk a mile in my worn down shoes.

Your original post did not include this information. That would be tough. I'm sorry to hear that.

OP here. Before everyone else piles on, let me add that I am a single parent who scrapes together the money for summer camp. I drive an old car, wear old clothes and bring a lunch I pack every day to a job where I am underpaid. My budget simply does not allow for $30 a week for ice cream at camp.

Some of you assume that I am denying my children something I was given (we ate ice cream at home, not from the ice cream truck). My parents, who were not wealthy, saved to pay for four years of college and most of my professional education as well. That is my priority for my children as well.

And no, I am not the same mom whose kid spent $18 on a lunch at the museum.

But flame away. I wish you could walk a mile in my worn down shoes.

This has to be fake. No one is this stupid.

You sound miserable. You can teach your kids about needs vs wants without making them feel left out and embarrassed.

This anecdote is more about YOU needing to assert control vs understanding your children.

I think you need to find another way to teach your kids about money besides being the odd ones out at camp without a treat. It's a hard age to say no.
Do they get an allowance? Can you do the different banks for allowance: save, donate, spend? They need more than just the abstract "don't spend money on icecream and save for something bigger". I get that you don't want them spoiled and want them to be conscious of the idea that everything costs money and if you spend it on something now you won't have some for later but that's too complicated. Can you give them a weeks of ice cream money and say: you can either spend it on ice cream at camp or well combine yours and your siblings and some of mine and get "fill in the blank" at the end of the week/two weeks for everyone.

Take a deep breath OP. It's summer and all children love ice cream. There are big lessons in life to learn and there are also little things in life that bring us joy.

Last summer, I went to pick up DC from camp early for a doctor's appointment. The snow cone truck was there. It was $2 for a small snow cone. DC was feeling guilty that she got a snow cone and there were a couple of children at the camp who did buy one b/c their parents didn't have to the money. This was DC's words. I quietly gave the lead camp counselor $20 and asked her to buy a some extra snow cones for some of the kids who didn't get one. She is very, very appreciative. I didn't expect to be paid back. Sometimes it feels good to see a child happy about something small like snow cones or ice cream.

OP, your kids are suffering enough by having you as a mother. The only thing you're teaching them is to hide things from you, like they did in this instance. Unclench and live a little, otherwise, in a few years, you'll have teens who hate you and resent you, and rightfully so. If it's a money issue, give up something you love so your kids can have something they love when everyone around them is also having it. If it's not a money issue, well, then, you're a bitch. Camp isn't the time to be teaching them these abstract concepts w/ regards to money.

Geesh your kids want ice cream with all the other kids at camp, can you blame them? Let it go. If you are trying to teach them a lesson, have them earn the money for the ice cream 2 x week or promise them they can have grocery store ice cream at home. Its summer!

My kids don't go to camp, but if they did, they too would not have any ice cream money.

So I understand where you're coming from, OP, but at the same time your kids might remember this moment very negatively indeed, so I would tread lightly there.

Perhaps you can teach them not to have another kid pay for them, and tell them they will have ice cream money every Friday. Compromise, see?