Anonymous
Post 07/22/2016 22:24     Subject: Did I Screw Up? Said Some Things To Her While Drunk
Anonymous wrote:To PP - the looking away and laughing could be that she didn't want to be vulnerable and admit she wasn't seeing anyone else before he did...it can be hard to be open when you're not sure what the other person is thinking or feeling.
I wouldn't assume the worst. Just relax and see how things go.


Well OP said she was his "number one and only one" first so why would she have a hard time admitting that it was the same for her if that's how she really felt?
Anonymous
Post 07/22/2016 22:10     Subject: Re:Did I Screw Up? Said Some Things To Her While Drunk
OP, I would let it go. If you want to take a 'next step' as a couple like being exclusive or changing your relationship status on fb, have that conversation with her.

Three months into my relationship with my now-husband, I got white girl wasted and gave him a whole speech about how great he was as a person, and how well we work as a couple, and that I kinda was falling in love with him right before I fell asleep. I woke up the next morning and didn't remember it until he mentioned it.

Talking about feelings is hard---when we were dating and saying "I love you" was embarrassing I would say "Ewww gross I'm having feelings please be less cute" or something and he would laugh and make a silly face. Being able to laugh about things that make you uncomfortable is important.
Anonymous
Post 07/22/2016 21:59     Subject: Did I Screw Up? Said Some Things To Her While Drunk
To PP - the looking away and laughing could be that she didn't want to be vulnerable and admit she wasn't seeing anyone else before he did...it can be hard to be open when you're not sure what the other person is thinking or feeling.
I wouldn't assume the worst. Just relax and see how things go.
Anonymous
Post 07/22/2016 21:28     Subject: Re:Did I Screw Up? Said Some Things To Her While Drunk
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP, you are young and got too drunk and said a few weird things. I actually don't even think what you said was that off the wall. To me you came across a bit jealous, which can actually be endearing. I think she probably assumed your comments were made because you really like her. It's natural to want to be number one! My boyfriend is 48 and still gets a little jealous and says similar things. I assume you just wanted some reassurance that you are a priority to her. I think she did not want to talk about it because there really is not much to talk about.


Thanks. Her laughing to just threw me off. I just took that as a bad sign.
Should I just tell her that I was "just kidding" or does that come off like I'm only taking it back out of fear for what she might say?


Me again...I really think her laughing was probably her thinking you were being cute. I laugh at some of the stuff my BF says in the heat of the moment or when drunk because I happen to be the type that laughs instead of blushes...I get the feeling you both like one another a lot and at the beginning it can be hard to talk about your feelings. I would just let it blow over and just give it some more time and then you two can have a real conversation about being exclusive. I would do it when you are sober I really dont think you screwed up...and ignore all the "grow up" "I dont get drunk" haters, lol....they are probably wet blankets. good luck!
Anonymous
Post 07/22/2016 20:13     Subject: Did I Screw Up? Said Some Things To Her While Drunk
Anonymous wrote:I wouldn't worry about it or bring it up again - clearly it hasn't done any damage because it seems that nothing has changed between you.

You were drunk and don't usually behave that way so she's not going to hold you accountable. She probably laughed because it was funny and not something you'd typically say when sober.

It might embarrass her to bring it up, too - because she doesn't know if you really meant it or it was the booze talking.

If everything seems fine between you, I'd just let it go. But don't let these jealous/insecure episodes become a pattern.
It's cute when it's out of character but if you behave this way every time you're drunk or feel vulnerable, things may go south.


I don't know. OP asked her if she was seeing other people, she looked away, then when he asked her to be serious she laughed. Even OP said he thought she was lying even when he was drunk. Then OP later on said lets stop playing games and for it just be the two of them. You bringing it up again makes me think that your gut was still telling you that you weren't quite sold on her answers.

I personally wouldn't be convinced either that she was telling the truth/not on the same page as you.
Anonymous
Post 07/22/2016 19:55     Subject: Did I Screw Up? Said Some Things To Her While Drunk
^^ between you two.
Anonymous
Post 07/22/2016 19:54     Subject: Did I Screw Up? Said Some Things To Her While Drunk
I wouldn't worry about it or bring it up again - clearly it hasn't done any damage because it seems that nothing has changed between you.

You were drunk and don't usually behave that way so she's not going to hold you accountable. She probably laughed because it was funny and not something you'd typically say when sober.

It might embarrass her to bring it up, too - because she doesn't know if you really meant it or it was the booze talking.

If everything seems fine between you, I'd just let it go. But don't let these jealous/insecure episodes become a pattern.
It's cute when it's out of character but if you behave this way every time you're drunk or feel vulnerable, things may go south.
Anonymous
Post 07/22/2016 19:53     Subject: Did I Screw Up? Said Some Things To Her While Drunk
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Stop getting drunk. Problem solved.


That's all people have to say?
I'm all grown up & middle aged and I would have liked this interaction fine. These are not bad things to say while drunk, it's kind of endearing stuff - as long as you meant it.
I'd want to get you drunk more often, really.


Yeah, that's all I have to say. I never get drunk. I never drink more than two drinks, because it interferes with heart medication I take daily and have since college. If he hadn't been drunk he'd be clear on what happened and what he thought about what happened.


You sound like a blast to hang out with.
Anonymous
Post 07/22/2016 19:40     Subject: Did I Screw Up? Said Some Things To Her While Drunk
Anonymous wrote:Do you always treat women as property op?


Omg, he did not do that at all. He talked about his feelings. Geez Louise what is wrong with you?
Anonymous
Post 07/22/2016 19:39     Subject: Did I Screw Up? Said Some Things To Her While Drunk
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:DH did something similar when we started dating. He had planned to do the whole "I love you let's be exclusive" convo when we went away on a romantic weekend. Instead we got completely drunk while celebrating a friends bday and he ended up babbling about loving me and me being his gf. I pretty much teased him saying he wouldn't remember it. Next morning after he was functioning again I teased him some more saying "ok I'm going to change my relationship status now". He remembered the whole conversation but was embarrassed that wbat he had planned on being a romantic talk ended up being a drunken slur of words.

I found hysterical . Nothing you did was all that bad. She might not have wanted to bring it up because she's either nervous you aren't going to remember/didn't mean it or she doesn't feel the same way and is hoping not to bring it up. You need to talk to her


Well this makes me feel a little better. It is pretty embarrassing to spill your feelings like that. Would you believe what I said if you were her?

Either way I guess I just need to talk to her.


Yes, I'd totally believe it.
Anonymous
Post 07/22/2016 19:37     Subject: Did I Screw Up? Said Some Things To Her While Drunk
Do you always treat women as property op?
Anonymous
Post 07/22/2016 19:19     Subject: Did I Screw Up? Said Some Things To Her While Drunk
Anonymous wrote:Grow up, simple.

+1. Grow up and come back in 15 years.
Anonymous
Post 07/22/2016 19:18     Subject: Did I Screw Up? Said Some Things To Her While Drunk
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Grow up, simple.


+1.
How do so many young, clueless people find aboard that is supposedly about parenting/relationships?


This is a question about relationships. Not all relationships involve parenting. Non-parents are allowed to post here.

If that's the case, high schoolers can post here too... but I prefer they do not.
Anonymous
Post 07/22/2016 19:12     Subject: Did I Screw Up? Said Some Things To Her While Drunk
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:DH did something similar when we started dating. He had planned to do the whole "I love you let's be exclusive" convo when we went away on a romantic weekend. Instead we got completely drunk while celebrating a friends bday and he ended up babbling about loving me and me being his gf. I pretty much teased him saying he wouldn't remember it. Next morning after he was functioning again I teased him some more saying "ok I'm going to change my relationship status now". He remembered the whole conversation but was embarrassed that wbat he had planned on being a romantic talk ended up being a drunken slur of words.

I found hysterical . Nothing you did was all that bad. She might not have wanted to bring it up because she's either nervous you aren't going to remember/didn't mean it or she doesn't feel the same way and is hoping not to bring it up. You need to talk to her


Well this makes me feel a little better. It is pretty embarrassing to spill your feelings like that. Would you believe what I said if you were her?

Either way I guess I just need to talk to her.


Completely depends (sorry!). When DH said all of this, I pretty much already knew how he felt by his actions and words. So even though he was incredibly drunk, I believed him. Yes, just talk to her.


Don't be sorry what you're saying makes sense. We had just spent 3 days together, were talking about a trip that we were going to take together, and asked for her and her girlfriends to come swing by my job just so I could see her. So taking into account my previous actions I'm pretty sure she believes what I said.
Anonymous
Post 07/22/2016 19:05     Subject: Did I Screw Up? Said Some Things To Her While Drunk
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Stop getting drunk. Problem solved.


That's all people have to say?
I'm all grown up & middle aged and I would have liked this interaction fine. These are not bad things to say while drunk, it's kind of endearing stuff - as long as you meant it.
I'd want to get you drunk more often, really.


Yeah, that's all I have to say. I never get drunk. I never drink more than two drinks, because it interferes with heart medication I take daily and have since college. If he hadn't been drunk he'd be clear on what happened and what he thought about what happened.