Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I can certainly see why you, as his girlfriend, would be intimidated by this. However, he's been friends with her for years and you've only been in his life for a few months. I would be pretty pissed if a new boyfriend started telling me that I shouldn't be friends with my close male friends because he was concerned that our texting about work BS and Game of Thrones was a threat to our relationship.

If I wanted to text my husband about these things, I would (and do!). Doesn't change that I'm also going to talk to other people in my life that I'm close to.

I think you need to figure out what exactly bothers you so much. That he chooses to talk to her instead of you? Do you want to talk to him for 3 hours while he's driving to see you? Do you want to text him incessantly?

I know this is my own insecurities. She is educated, I am not, she is single living extremely well(saw pictures of her home), I am back living with parents with son from previous relationship, she is well traveled, I haven't been off the east coast. I ask myself why has he picked me over her and if she isn't interested now but changes her mind and snaps her fingers does he just disappear out of my life. I feel like a second fiddle, like he settled for me cause he couldn't have her.

Well, think about it this way. She's a lot older than him and also is his superior at work. My husband has a pretty strong relationship with a woman who used to be his boss, but she's 15 years older than him and he definitely sees her on the same level as his aunt. He likes her, they talk regularly about mutual interests, and she has definitely played a really important role in his life, but he doesn't see her romantically.

Do you have anything other than a lot of communications to indicate that your boyfriend sees this woman romantically?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I can certainly see why you, as his girlfriend, would be intimidated by this. However, he's been friends with her for years and you've only been in his life for a few months. I would be pretty pissed if a new boyfriend started telling me that I shouldn't be friends with my close male friends because he was concerned that our texting about work BS and Game of Thrones was a threat to our relationship.

If I wanted to text my husband about these things, I would (and do!). Doesn't change that I'm also going to talk to other people in my life that I'm close to.

I think you need to figure out what exactly bothers you so much. That he chooses to talk to her instead of you? Do you want to talk to him for 3 hours while he's driving to see you? Do you want to text him incessantly?

I know this is my own insecurities. She is educated, I am not, she is single living extremely well(saw pictures of her home), I am back living with parents with son from previous relationship, she is well traveled, I haven't been off the east coast. I ask myself why has he picked me over her and if she isn't interested now but changes her mind and snaps her fingers does he just disappear out of my life. I feel like a second fiddle, like he settled for me cause he couldn't have her.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a relationship like this with my best guy friend. He is married and his wife doesn't know I exist. We just have a connection like no other. But relationship wise we just don't work. We talk and text constantly.

So you did have a relationship at one time? Why doesn't his wife know about you?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If they were friendly like this before you came into the picture, it's not so bad. But if the volume of calls and texts increased during your relationship, I'd be upset. I'd also be upset about them saying good night.

Yeah seriously, there is something really intimate about that and I don't know why. As far as pp saying you violated his privacy by reading his text, how did you get to them in the first place?

Anonymous wrote:I have a relationship like this with my best guy friend. He is married and his wife doesn't know I exist. We just have a connection like no other. But relationship wise we just don't work. We talk and text constantly.

Anonymous wrote:If they were friendly like this before you came into the picture, it's not so bad. But if the volume of calls and texts increased during your relationship, I'd be upset. I'd also be upset about them saying good night.

Anonymous wrote:The level of intimacy is alarming, yes I agree.

Flip the roles here and ask yourself why you, as a successful, attractive single female would be texting a guy at work immediately after work through the evening and ending with "good night."

Anonymous wrote:I can certainly see why you, as his girlfriend, would be intimidated by this. However, he's been friends with her for years and you've only been in his life for a few months. I would be pretty pissed if a new boyfriend started telling me that I shouldn't be friends with my close male friends because he was concerned that our texting about work BS and Game of Thrones was a threat to our relationship.

If I wanted to text my husband about these things, I would (and do!). Doesn't change that I'm also going to talk to other people in my life that I'm close to.

I think you need to figure out what exactly bothers you so much. That he chooses to talk to her instead of you? Do you want to talk to him for 3 hours while he's driving to see you? Do you want to text him incessantly?

Anonymous wrote:From a female: This seems very odd and I get the fact that it bugs you. Can't put your finger on it but it seems wrong. Sort of like "I can't define porn but I know it when I see it". Is he infatuated with this woman, is she leading him on in some way and doesn't realize it? That volume of text could be leading him on alone. How long have you been dating, how long has he known her?