Anonymous wrote:Read the book Passionate Marriage. It's by far the best and most useful relationship book I've ever read.

+1 Great Book! Best part about the book is that it empowers any unhappy spouse to take matters into their own hands instead of feeling helpless.

Read the book Passionate Marriage. It's by far the best and most useful relationship book I've ever read.

OP, are you around? Has anything improved between you and your husband?

OP, at least you don't fight. Your arrangement is not as bad as you think. Could be much worse and more annoying.

Don’t give up! You can kick start it! This happens in lots of marriages. It sounds like you have a beautiful family with well-adjusted children. Don’t give that up for a different set of problems that arise come when parent split.

There are many, many factors that can cause people to feel like the spark is gone and there are many ways to overcome this problem. I suggest this series of articles http://bit.ly/29u0X14 because I think it sounds like you and your husband just need to spend some time on yourselves and there are great techniques for maximizing that time. This website might be helpful as well,http://www.5lovelanguages.com/Take the quiz to discover your “love language.” I know it sounds goofy but it will help you learn about yourself. I’m also a big fan of the book Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus. Helped me understand my husband better.

Don’t surrender, fight the good fight and win!

Anonymous wrote:It's not just sex that helps marriages, it's trying new things. Take up a hobby together, go out dancing, try a new ethnic restaurant every other week. Just something out of your comfort zone.

This. talk to him. Don't wait another day.

I'm not reading this to say OP is unattracted to her husband but rather things are stale and flat and therefore she doesn't feel the spark of attraction. I think the latter is common at times in most marriage and can be worked out of, but it requires a commitment, initiation, and a fake-it-until-you-make-it mindset. Failure on the part of one or both partners to step up and act in ways that, at this point, may not feel easy or natural will inevitably result in further deterioration of intimacy and connection and place the marriage in more peril. Marriage requires action even when it's the last thing you want to do.