Anonymous wrote:God. Pathetic.

Most people grow out of these worries by the time they are out of HS.

Quit giving a crap what others think.

+1

I drive a 10-year old dented Honda. I like being able to park it anywhere and not care about dings, etc.

My boys just want the Target lunchbox. They wear sports gear to school---as do most of the boys.

I figure the original post was a troll because it's so ridiculous.

The people that responded are even scarier. Keep up with Jones, teach materialistic values. Well done!

God. Pathetic.

Most people grow out of these worries by the time they are out of HS.

Quit giving a crap what others think.

Anonymous wrote:My soon to be 3rd grader still doesn't care what other people are wearing or what type of backpack and lunch box they have. And the only thing she's specifically asked for is a rolling backpack.

BTW, not to derail, but are rolling backpacks necessary? At what age?

They're dangerous in school corridors because they are trip hazard. As a school volunteer, I hate them.
Buy her something cute to clip to her backpack instead, or a new lunchbox or something.

Anonymous wrote:We're poor. My kid is in private. Uniform policy is the best thing that could have happened to us. It even covers jewelry (plain gold studs only and just a single hole per ear)

I wish public schools would implement uniforms!

My soon to be 3rd grader still doesn't care what other people are wearing or what type of backpack and lunch box they have. And the only thing she's specifically asked for is a rolling backpack.

BTW, not to derail, but are rolling backpacks necessary? At what age?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP is cheap not poor . YUCK

I'm "cheap," not poor, too. Why, "yuck?" I imagine my investment accounts, retirement accounts, rental properties, jewelry, etc. exceed yours but my kids are almost always in hand me downs and thrift store finds. You'd never know it: Justice, Under Armour, Nike, Land's End, etc. I'll "yuk" it up all the way to the bank and teach my kids a lesson, too.

My parents were frugal, I am the opposite.
It was shutty seeing other people have more and better stuff.
Hope your bank account makes you happy.
We go to Cayman and Europe annually.

Being frugal is considered a virtue everywhere apart from here, the country of massive consumerism, credit card debt and personal bankruptcies.

It is BECAUSE we are frugal that we can afford occasional fancy vacations to Asia and Europe. We choose to tighten our belts for that, or to save for college, or buy less house to afford the great public school neighborhood.

The person saying yuck is either lucky enough to be able to afford the life she wants, or too blind to see financial catastrophe coming her way. She should have more respect for others' choices.

We live in downtown Bethesda, and I have to say that some parents do notice and care about whether kids live in an apartment or a house, because they imagine it means:
1. An income differential.
2. A transience issue (many families working for World Bank and Foreign Service who leave after 2 years, or international families who return home).
As for cars, same thing - some parents care about that sort of thing.

Most parents are kind enough not to let it affect party guest lists and such. However, I've noticed that powerful parent cliques forming at school depend on shared high income / high status values.

Anonymous wrote:I am poor (so, by default, so is my daughter) and one thing I always felt that would make her stand out was if her pants were too short. I may have bought them from super cheap places, but she's never worn high water pants.

She's 13 and still never owned anything by Under Armor or gotten a passport. Somehow happy with lots of nice friends despite that.

OP, I think you should judge yourself, and harshly, if you'd seriously consider getting rid of a 20 yr old car because of what kindergartners and their parents might think of you for having it. Shame on you. Why would you even WANT to be friends with anyone who'd judge you for living in a condo?

This. I am not poor but grew up as if I was (too short pants, hand-me-downs that are 10-15 years out of style, etc.). The most important thing you can do is buy clothes that fit, keep them clean, free of holes and relatively in style. At this age, no one cares. But because of my own experience, I make sure my kids a dressed pretty well. That said, 90% of their clothes come from Value Village. I do splurge on shoes though. But always buy on sale.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP is cheap not poor . YUCK

I'm "cheap," not poor, too. Why, "yuck?" I imagine my investment accounts, retirement accounts, rental properties, jewelry, etc. exceed yours but my kids are almost always in hand me downs and thrift store finds. You'd never know it: Justice, Under Armour, Nike, Land's End, etc. I'll "yuk" it up all the way to the bank and teach my kids a lesson, too.

My parents were frugal, I am the opposite.
It was shutty seeing other people have more and better stuff.
Hope your bank account makes you happy.
We go to Cayman and Europe annually.

I won't tell you not to worry about this: Kids do notice and worry about such things.

But don't worry yet. Kindergartners don't.

In a few years, your child might start whining for specific items. At that point you can decide where to give in (a shirt, a backpack) and where not to. In any case, it would be insane to base your housing choices on what an 8-year old thinks.

FWIW, I'm pretty frugal but just love the look of the PBK backpacks and lunch boxes and decided to splurge when my daughter started Kindergarten on a matching backpack and lunchbox. She just finished 2nd grade and both are still in great shape, save a few dirt smudges. They'll easily make it through 3rd grade, so when you divide the cost out by 4 years and how much we've enjoyed their cuteness, it has been worth it for me.

Anonymous wrote:OP is cheap not poor . YUCK

I'm "cheap," not poor, too. Why, "yuck?" I imagine my investment accounts, retirement accounts, rental properties, jewelry, etc. exceed yours but my kids are almost always in hand me downs and thrift store finds. You'd never know it: Justice, Under Armour, Nike, Land's End, etc. I'll "yuk" it up all the way to the bank and teach my kids a lesson, too.

Anonymous wrote:I am poor (so, by default, so is my daughter) and one thing I always felt that would make her stand out was if her pants were too short. I may have bought them from super cheap places, but she's never worn high water pants.

She's 13 and still never owned anything by Under Armor or gotten a passport. Somehow happy with lots of nice friends despite that.

OP, I think you should judge yourself, and harshly, if you'd seriously consider getting rid of a 20 yr old car because of what kindergartners and their parents might think of you for having it. Shame on you. Why would you even WANT to be friends with anyone who'd judge you for living in a condo?

+1 to PP's comment about pants being too short. My parents did not have alot of money growing up and my pants were consistently too short -- to the point other kids made fun of me. I hated it.

My kids are in FCPS and in ES (especially K) nobody cares what you're wearing. My kids primarily wear clothes from Target or Old Navy. Name brands might be an issue as the kids get older but definitely not at the younger ages. And if it is an issue, go to thrift stores or yard sales. The boys seem to only wear gym shorts and t-shirts.

FWIW, my car is 12 years old. HHI of $350K. My neighbors, who presumably have a similar HHI, drive a late-90s Honda Accord. They may take a dozen vacations a year, but their car is 20 years old.

We get great stuff from thrift stores. UnderArmour, licensed team jerseys, North Face, Vineyard Vines, etc. My kids didn't seem to care about brands until middle-high school (and another thank God for uniforms here). Buy things that fit and aren't too faded or stained. There even was a period for my high schoolers where thrift shopping with friends was a big thing.

I agree with buying quality when you can - we have an LLBean backpack that made it through middle and high school and is now in college.

Anonymous wrote:The things kids judge about in kindergarten:
Who has the "best" lunch (ie, anything with sugar)
Who's family has a pet
Who knows the most about Frozen/baseball/Tree frogs/whatever
Who took the ball at recess

And who was line leader - this is the big kahuna job that they all covet.