Anonymous wrote:tnx for help... my biggest problem is that i cant merge two sides of relationship... one day im all angry and depressed because i let it go that far and treat me that way, then another day im all sentimental and thinking about good stuff/nice things she did for me, etc... you know what i mean.
its hard for me to see both at once and admit that this relationship was not good and would end eventually anyway. She was my first so i believe that is a big factor too. There was a period of time i was very happy with her, i mean really happy. but sometimes its like I wish i d never have this memories in the first place - because in the end these hurt more then the bad ones.
Haven't had a romantic relationship like this but in a friendship I realized many of the times I thought my "friend" was being so thoughtful, it was a way to manipulate people and put herself at the center of everything. There really wasn't anything that turned out to really be thoughtful, genuine, with no ulterior motive ..sad to say. But I also realize there was something going on mentally with her and "you can't change someone that doesn't want to change"