Anonymous
05/21/2016 20:57
Subject: Lamest reason
Oh come on, people, I think OP knows it's a lame reason (thus the thread title) but she's showing how she used this "lame reason" as a mental trick to keep her working on her marriage.
Anonymous
05/21/2016 20:34
Subject: Lamest reason
You can keep the ring if you divorce. It could be a bargaining chip in the settlement.
Anonymous
05/21/2016 19:11
Subject: Re:Lamest reason
Why would you want the ring if it was from his family? I don't like my ring for precisely that reason. We're both too lazy or stubborn to divorce right now.
Anonymous
05/21/2016 18:42
Subject: Lamest reason
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Op here.
I like my ring. What can I say. Of course it is mine, legally. But it is a family piece. I wouldn't feel right keeping that if we divorced. It would belong back in his family.
The ring isn't the only thing keeping me here, folks, or even close to the main thing keeping me here. I'm not a one-dimensional bitch. It is one thing that when I look at it I think I want to keep and is another reason to continue working on my marriage.
Yes, the ring symbolizes more ... family, friends, commitment. In fact, I couldn't wear it regularly for a while because it was hurting my finger. It was real pain in my ring finger brought on by emotional pain. It still does, sometimes.
So. I don't actually want advice. I don't need that. I wanted to know if anybody else had similar experiences. But I see I'm one of only a few multi-dimensional people here.
Spare me the dramatics!
You should have posted that in you OP.
Instead you wanted to be cute.
People call you out, and in classic DCUM fashion you add more detail so people pity you.
Poor misunderstood OP.
However, I do sincerely hope it works out for you and your husband.
+1
You suck, OP. You're garbage inside, and your DH knows it, and that's why your marriage is failing.
Normal people don't value a ring over the happiness of their spouse or themselves.
Anonymous
05/21/2016 18:38
Subject: Re:Lamest reason
Many people stay married so they don't have to endure a big disruption in their lives and go back into the horrible dating scene. None of these are lame, divorce can be a domino effect.
If you want to give the ring back fine, but I would bet if it's amicable dh probably wouldn't care. If you have kids, promise to give it to your daughter since it's a "family" ring.
My friend was with a horrible cheater, and made sure to get all the "family" jewelry so their daughter would get it. She knew otherwise one of the bimbo's would end up with it.
If you want to give the ring back fine, but I would bet if it's amicable dh probably wouldn't care. If you have kids, promise to give it to your daughter since it's a "family" ring.
My friend was with a horrible cheater, and made sure to get all the "family" jewelry so their daughter would get it. She knew otherwise one of the bimbo's would end up with it.
Anonymous
05/21/2016 18:20
Subject: Lamest reason
Anonymous wrote:Op here.
I like my ring. What can I say. Of course it is mine, legally. But it is a family piece. I wouldn't feel right keeping that if we divorced. It would belong back in his family.
The ring isn't the only thing keeping me here, folks, or even close to the main thing keeping me here. I'm not a one-dimensional bitch. It is one thing that when I look at it I think I want to keep and is another reason to continue working on my marriage.
Yes, the ring symbolizes more ... family, friends, commitment. In fact, I couldn't wear it regularly for a while because it was hurting my finger. It was real pain in my ring finger brought on by emotional pain. It still does, sometimes.
So. I don't actually want advice. I don't need that. I wanted to know if anybody else had similar experiences. But I see I'm one of only a few multi-dimensional people here.
Spare me the dramatics!
You should have posted that in you OP.
Instead you wanted to be cute.
People call you out, and in classic DCUM fashion you add more detail so people pity you.
Poor misunderstood OP.
However, I do sincerely hope it works out for you and your husband.
Anonymous
05/21/2016 18:09
Subject: Re:Lamest reason
Anonymous wrote:I have been spurred on to work through stuff in my marriage because I am afraid that my kids would like my husbands hypothetical new wife better than they like me. If that's not neurotic, I don't know what is.
I have been spurred on to work through stuff in my marriage because I am afraid my wife will go out and bang a different guy every night while I sit alone in a beaten up apartment.
Anonymous
05/21/2016 18:02
Subject: Lamest reason
At least you know it's a lame reason. That's something
Anonymous
05/21/2016 17:23
Subject: Re:Lamest reason
Anonymous wrote:I have been spurred on to work through stuff in my marriage because I am afraid that my kids would like my husbands hypothetical new wife better than they like me. If that's not neurotic, I don't know what is.
Sounds reasonable to me!
Anonymous
05/21/2016 17:22
Subject: Lamest reason
Op here.
I like my ring. What can I say. Of course it is mine, legally. But it is a family piece. I wouldn't feel right keeping that if we divorced. It would belong back in his family.
The ring isn't the only thing keeping me here, folks, or even close to the main thing keeping me here. I'm not a one-dimensional bitch. It is one thing that when I look at it I think I want to keep and is another reason to continue working on my marriage.
Yes, the ring symbolizes more ... family, friends, commitment. In fact, I couldn't wear it regularly for a while because it was hurting my finger. It was real pain in my ring finger brought on by emotional pain. It still does, sometimes.
So. I don't actually want advice. I don't need that. I wanted to know if anybody else had similar experiences. But I see I'm one of only a few multi-dimensional people here.
I like my ring. What can I say. Of course it is mine, legally. But it is a family piece. I wouldn't feel right keeping that if we divorced. It would belong back in his family.
The ring isn't the only thing keeping me here, folks, or even close to the main thing keeping me here. I'm not a one-dimensional bitch. It is one thing that when I look at it I think I want to keep and is another reason to continue working on my marriage.
Yes, the ring symbolizes more ... family, friends, commitment. In fact, I couldn't wear it regularly for a while because it was hurting my finger. It was real pain in my ring finger brought on by emotional pain. It still does, sometimes.
So. I don't actually want advice. I don't need that. I wanted to know if anybody else had similar experiences. But I see I'm one of only a few multi-dimensional people here.
Anonymous
05/21/2016 17:10
Subject: Re:Lamest reason
I have been spurred on to work through stuff in my marriage because I am afraid that my kids would like my husbands hypothetical new wife better than they like me. If that's not neurotic, I don't know what is.
Anonymous
05/21/2016 17:01
Subject: Lamest reason
Sounds like one of those stories where an engaged guy doesn't break up because it would be easier to go ahead with the marriage.
Anonymous
05/21/2016 16:57
Subject: Re:Lamest reason
Anonymous wrote:I stayed with my STBX for 9 years because I didn't want to face all the people who'd said marrying him was a bad idea.
Pride and fear of other people's judgments are both pretty lame reasons, IMO.
And I don't even have a ring!
I stayed 9 years with a ex because I didn't want to lose our beautiful house. I ended up with it in the divorce, whoohoo!
Anonymous
05/21/2016 16:56
Subject: Lamest reason
Anonymous wrote:
Don't listen to the haters, OP, and do whatever you need to do.
There are plenty of spouses out there staying for the money, the social group, the spousal job prestige, the whatever.
If a ring can spur you to efforts of good listening, civility and constructive criticism, then more power to you!!!
Exactly, few admit it and the BIG ring. Actually she doesn't have to give the ring back legally.
Anonymous
05/21/2016 16:54
Subject: Re:Lamest reason
I'm confused, you're not engaged and broke off the engagement where you would be expected to give the ring back. That is your ring to keep!! If you get divorced I wouldn't give it back, problem solved!!!!