Anonymous
04/28/2016 18:20
Subject: Ugh, salary negotiations!
I am a woman. I have a long history of successful salary negotiation. I think what you are doing is completely expected and important as long as you are respectful and reasonable.
But I offer you a caution (and hate that I even have to say this): sometimes negotiating can come back to bite you. You may think your requests are reasonable, but your new employer may hold you to unfair (and unreasonable) standards if you negotiate too much. Unfortunately I am currently in a situation where I negotiated well and now have that thrown in my face every time something goes less than perfectly - I am now constantly told that they really went out on a limb to get me and now I am not meeting expectations. Which is untrue on paper, but the negotiation experience created unspoken expectations in my supervisor's mind.
But I offer you a caution (and hate that I even have to say this): sometimes negotiating can come back to bite you. You may think your requests are reasonable, but your new employer may hold you to unfair (and unreasonable) standards if you negotiate too much. Unfortunately I am currently in a situation where I negotiated well and now have that thrown in my face every time something goes less than perfectly - I am now constantly told that they really went out on a limb to get me and now I am not meeting expectations. Which is untrue on paper, but the negotiation experience created unspoken expectations in my supervisor's mind.
Anonymous
04/28/2016 18:08
Subject: Ugh, salary negotiations!
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:So, as a woman, for the first time in my life I tried to stand up for myself and negotiate more money after receiving an offer for a new job. I thought I handled things with tact and care, and sought careful professional advice on how best to approach the negotiation (for the first time!). But all I got was attitude and a "put you in your place" approach from the employer. I feel like crying and like I was being slapped for trying to have a voice. I am a highly trained and educated professional with years of experience, and the employer is respectable organization. Anyway, I feel like there is a lot of lip-service to the whole "stand-up-for-yourself approach", but at the end of the day people really don't want women to speak up for themselves. The worst part? The people who put me in my place were also women.
Yup. Yes, women need to speak up more and try to negotiate for themselves, but that's not the only reason why we are paid less. Employers respond differently to is than men when we try to negotiate.
Sure what a load of crap. Women 24-35 make 93% of what men make and in urban areas like DC women make more vs men in that age range. I know lots of men who are bad at negotiating...in general the employer has the advantages unless it's a higher level job. But if you feel you failed to get more money because they are not willing to work with you because you are a women, DO NOT TAKE THE JOB. During the interview process, it's the best it will be...everyone is on their best behavior. It will only go down hill once you are employed. If you do not take the job, tell them you believe they screwed you out of pay because you are a women. That will give them a scare.
Anonymous
04/28/2016 17:58
Subject: Re:Ugh, salary negotiations!
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:OP here: Would they rescind my offer for having negotiated back and forth probably more than they are used to? I really was super polite and careful but did ask about many things.
My employer would evaluate and may rescind. We have a package (quite a good one) but it is non-negotiable. If you tried too much we would worry that you wouldn't be happy with us and we'd rather find someone else.
Let's pretend for a minute you're not lying. Because maybe you're not.
I would never work somewhere with a "non-negotiable" package. That sounds like a very backwards organization that doesn't value getting the best talent and retaining/growing people.
And rescinding offers for those who attempt to negotiate? No wonder you ended up with such backward policies -- the best talent ALWAYS negotiates because they know they will get offers from many employers, so you've obviously been stuck with the low-talent folks who don't feel they can negotiate. You're literally finding a way not to hire the best people. What an incredibly stupid policy.
But then again, I know you're lying. Still, it's hilarious trolling.
Sadly, I have clients like this. So incredibly stupid. Cutting off their noses and all that.
That being said, I have rescinded when negotiations have gone beyond what is reasonable. I fully expect countering but I've had one or two who were ridiculous after we had come back more than once with reasonable bumps, more leave, etc. I totally cut bait on one complete pain in my ass (a man, btw).