Anonymous wrote:Do you force it?

No. Not everyone is a "sports" person. Our DS is into video games and music, and couldn't care less about playing a sport. As long as your kids are reasonably physically active, there's absolutely no reason to make an issue out of sports participation.

I wouldn't require my son to play an organized sport but I would expect him to do something involving other people. My neighbor's son is 15 and is very anti social. I've seen him twice in the last year. I barely recognized him because he grew so tall. He plays video games in the basement. I don't think that's healthy or normal so my son will do something outside of school. My son plays tennis and fences but even if he didn't like sports, he would be involved in something- youth group, art classes, a language class, etc.

I agree with an earlier poster that there is this pressure that boys need to play organized sports. My tween son does not play soccer or basketball. He hated it, it was painful for us as parents to watch. When we stopped 'requiring' it, he was so much happier. He, too, plays tennis, walks about a mile to school and bike and likes to ride his bike.

Repeat to yourself that it is OK that your son does not like to play an organized sport. Rinse. Repeat.

The media is all sports all the time. As are parents in this area.

My DS teen plays tennis, which is not an organized sport, I guess? He loves it a lot, but he does have friends from tennis. We don't force it, he wants to do it.

I do remember trying to get my son on a soccer team when he was in early elementary school. The practices were on weekdays at 4:00 and not really feasible for people who get home from work at 6:30.

I expect parents of young kids may use the "requirement" word thinking they are hit sh-t that their kids comply. Requiring anything beyond school attendance and homework completion goes out the window somewhat in middle school and certainly in high school, which makes sense given their need for more independence. I encourage my middle school son to engage in physical activities, be it walking, biking, etc., but if he's not into it then it's a weekly struggle that will turn him off and drive the rest of the family crazy.

Our kids are required to play a team sport in spring and fall. That's been easy as they are pretty young and like soccer and, to a lesser extent, baseball. One DC is at a private school that, now in middle school, is really strict about playing on a school team. As they've gotten better at a sport, they have more fun doing it. As long as they continue in private school, I think there'll be pressure to play a team sport that the schools offer, so I don't think it'll be us doing the pressuring as they get into middle and upper school.

My brother was the only one in our family of girls that never played any sport of any kind. My mom would encourage him but he was fairly hopeless athletic wise. He also never took music or any of the arts etc. He would sit in his room for hours on end transforming bits of electronics, that my Mom would pick up at yard sales, into various things. He then got interested in computers and never looked back. He recently sold *his* tech company and as part of the deal he is spending two years living in a gorgeous condo in Northern Italy with his lovely wife before he moves on to his next venture. Damn that nerd as I used to call him!!!

Anonymous wrote:I think all this reassurance is totally right for OP, but I don't think it's an unreasonable question to ask. There are schools and neighborhoods that are very sports-heavy for boys, so it's not just the same as not playing an instrument or whatever. Many private schools require you to be on a team. I also have non-sporty boys and have felt this pressure. Plenty of parents do force their kids. I would not, though.

Yeah and we all know how it works out for those idiots.

Anonymous wrote:Obamas do as reported 4 years ago. I wonder if they still do:
"Malia and Sasha have to play two sports: one they choose and one selected by their mother."

http://globalgrind.com/2012/09/08/obama-family-rules-sasha-malia-strict-parents-details/

From this article:
They must play a team sport. “Sports is an expectation, and we say it’s an expectation because it’s about good health,” the first lady said. “It’s about learning how to play on a team, learning how to lose, learning how to win gracefully, learning how to trash talk and not get your feelings hurt.”

Obamas do as reported 4 years ago. I wonder if they still do:
"Malia and Sasha have to play two sports: one they choose and one selected by their mother."

http://globalgrind.com/2012/09/08/obama-family-rules-sasha-malia-strict-parents-details/

I think all this reassurance is totally right for OP, but I don't think it's an unreasonable question to ask. There are schools and neighborhoods that are very sports-heavy for boys, so it's not just the same as not playing an instrument or whatever. Many private schools require you to be on a team. I also have non-sporty boys and have felt this pressure. Plenty of parents do force their kids. I would not, though.

My 13 yr old does no sports. we pushed for awhile but he just hated it so much. He does science clubs, etc. and walks or runs to school every day. He's fit so we let it go. We are outfitting a home gym so I wonder if he will work out in time. He's still young.

Anyone have a teen boy who doesn't participate in theater, painting or dance? If so, do you force this?

I don't "force it," but I do keep trying to encourage my teen son to get involved in theater. I think he'd like it, he's really a ham, but for some reason he's resistant.

Yes. He did martial arts through black belt (by age 13) and then never went back again. He likes snowboarding, trampolining, long boarding, riding his bike, but was never interested in team sports or really any kind of competition.