Inviting one twin and not the other same sex twin to a first grade birthday party is like as adults inviting the wife to a wedding and not the husband. At a young age, same sex twins do everything together.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow. I'm pregnant with twins right now and I would NEVER assume that both kids were invited to the party. In fact it's probably better for each kid to have their individual friends rather than be constantly lumped together. I guess as hostess you have to graciously accept both but on future invites specify 'no siblings' to hopefully avoid the problem.

What? As a mother of twin boys myself, get ready for a big learning curve. They are twins, the mom of twins didn't know who was actually invited based on the evite. Twins same sex attending the same school is totally different then bringing along a sibling 3 years older.

Twins are siblings. Unless they are conjoined, there's no logical reason why any student not in OP's child's class should attend the party.

X1000 twins are only special to their parents. To the rest of us they are simply siblings. Are we supposed to write on invites 'no siblings or twins'?

The twin mom was wrong and rude.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Pregnant twin Mom 8:28, come back to us other twin moms after your kids are a bit older, and we will see if you say the same thing!

I will say the exact same thing. I wonder what makes you think I wouldn't? It's good manners, plain and simple. That doesn't change after birth.

You don't know until you have them and you will probably need to walk this one back once your kids are here.

Very likely, the kids do know one another. There is a lot of mixing classes in elementary school during specials and recess. Plus, as someone else said, the boys will end up being inclass with the other twin at least several times over the next few years, along with scouts, baseball, soccer, minecraft club, etc.

Anonymous wrote:OP here, my instinct was to just let it go. but I wanted to double check it. twin was in quotes b/c I haven't had coffee yet! we live in a small town house so 1 extra person does make a difference. we won't have enough seats for everyone etc and I thought it might be weird to have a kid at the party who doesn't know the other kids....but I am reminded now that at 6/7 you pretty much just play with whoever anyway. so hopefully it will all work out.
this is our first twin friend so we don't have experience with it--are twins just treated as a package deal until an older age? if you invite one, you invite both etc?

Psst.

1st grade boys don't sit at parties. Even during cake time.

Neither do 2nd grade boys. Or 3rd grade boys.

They bounce around, run, jump, spin, wiggle...but sitting? Not very well and certainly not all at once. Okay, they might sit for about five minutes to eat some cake. But mostly, they don't. And, first grade boys are not picky or judgemental, so you can pull out a desk chair or a lawn chair and they will think it is quite grand. Actually, they will all see the lawn chair or the stepstool or tye spinning desk chair as the "special chair" and will be happy to sit there.

Boys don't sit at partied until they get to the age where birthday parties consist of a handful of close friends watching movies or playing video games.

So unless you are throwing a video game party, you do not need to worry about having enough chairs for a boy party.

Anonymous wrote:Why is twin in quotes? Is it an actual twin or not?

It's Valdemort

Anonymous wrote:OP here, my instinct was to just let it go. but I wanted to double check it. twin was in quotes b/c I haven't had coffee yet! we live in a small town house so 1 extra person does make a difference. we won't have enough seats for everyone etc and I thought it might be weird to have a kid at the party who doesn't know the other kids....but I am reminded now that at 6/7 you pretty much just play with whoever anyway. so hopefully it will all work out.
this is our first twin friend so we don't have experience with it--are twins just treated as a package deal until an older age? if you invite one, you invite both etc?

Mom of elementary school age kids here- I've always considered twins to be a package deal especially when they are around 6/7 years of age.
My son has 3 sets of twin friends and 1 mom is very specific on which twin we want to invite over, with it's a birthday party or just play date. We always reiterate both are welcomed. Mom of said twins is very much appreciative and mentioned that other parents have gotten upset when she assumed both boys were invited. That makes me sad for how inconsiderate some parents can be to children!
Not saying you are OP! I think it's good for you to ask but some people have weird to get angry.
And to the poster who said twins have the best birthday parties! They absolutely do!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow. I'm pregnant with twins right now and I would NEVER assume that both kids were invited to the party. In fact it's probably better for each kid to have their individual friends rather than be constantly lumped together. I guess as hostess you have to graciously accept both but on future invites specify 'no siblings' to hopefully avoid the problem.

What? As a mother of twin boys myself, get ready for a big learning curve. They are twins, the mom of twins didn't know who was actually invited based on the evite. Twins same sex attending the same school is totally different then bringing along a sibling 3 years older.

Twins are siblings. Unless they are conjoined, there's no logical reason why any student not in OP's child's class should attend the party.

Anonymous wrote:Pregnant twin Mom 8:28, come back to us other twin moms after your kids are a bit older, and we will see if you say the same thing!

I will say the exact same thing. I wonder what makes you think I wouldn't? It's good manners, plain and simple. That doesn't change after birth.

Anonymous wrote:You people are cray cray... it's 1st grade... you can't fit another 1st grader? GMAFB... who invites 1 twin.

Word!!! Like.... Really.

Anonymous wrote:Wow. I'm pregnant with twins right now and I would NEVER assume that both kids were invited to the party. In fact it's probably better for each kid to have their individual friends rather than be constantly lumped together. I guess as hostess you have to graciously accept both but on future invites specify 'no siblings' to hopefully avoid the problem.

What? As a mother of twin boys myself, get ready for a big learning curve. They are twins, the mom of twins didn't know who was actually invited based on the evite. Twins same sex attending the same school is totally different then bringing along a sibling 3 years older.

Pregnant twin Mom 8:28, come back to us other twin moms after your kids are a bit older, and we will see if you say the same thing!

Wow. I'm pregnant with twins right now and I would NEVER assume that both kids were invited to the party. In fact it's probably better for each kid to have their individual friends rather than be constantly lumped together. I guess as hostess you have to graciously accept both but on future invites specify 'no siblings' to hopefully avoid the problem.

Anonymous wrote:OP here, my instinct was to just let it go. but I wanted to double check it. twin was in quotes b/c I haven't had coffee yet! we live in a small town house so 1 extra person does make a difference. we won't have enough seats for everyone etc and I thought it might be weird to have a kid at the party who doesn't know the other kids....but I am reminded now that at 6/7 you pretty much just play with whoever anyway. so hopefully it will all work out.
this is our first twin friend so we don't have experience with it--are twins just treated as a package deal until an older age? if you invite one, you invite both etc?

OP twin mom here: As the twins get older, they go their separate ways, and you are not required to ask both of them. But at a young age, they are used to doing things together. You obviously do not know them well since you did not know that DS friend had a twin. The flip side is that twin birthday parties are usually fun and a big event, so your DS has an opportunity to meet others in his grade. When we first moved here, many years ago, and did not know many people -- getting to know people -- some moms were pretty mean in telling me that "that OTHER twin is NOT invited!" (we don't have chairs...!) First impressions are lasting ones, and sometimes very accurate as well.

I have twin boys and I can't tell you how many times I've received an invitation and I have no idea which kid it's for. (Evite only makes the name specification optional and it's impossible to invite two kids with the same email address.) In first grade, I assumed both were invited to a party and I was wrong. It was awkward. After that, if my kid's name wasn't on the invitation I would sheepishly contact the parent to ask which kid was invited.

To answer your question: No, twins are not automatically a package deal but I can understand how a parent might assume both could come. If you can fit the extra kid, let him come. It's extremely unlikely that every invited kid can make it so you'll likely have enough space.

Anonymous wrote:You people are cray cray... it's 1st grade... you can't fit another 1st grader? GMAFB... who invites 1 twin.

This! OP's drama is laughable...and what's with saying none of the invited kids are friends with the twin--they are 6, their group of friends will change many times, stop trying to make a clique for first graders. And presumably the invited twin is friends with he own twin, so OP's statement is ridiculous.