OP, the same question has been hanging in my mind lately. We're in Bethesda and it seems like everyone here is on a rotation of pricey vacations during Xmas break and spring break. One is usually a beach destination and the other skiing. Summer vacations too, although at least some of these are beach trips so presumably not quite as expensive. And mostly these are not families w/2 FT working parents. Yet somehow they have $20-30k for vacations per year.

We make very good money, not as much as the OP but in a similar ballpark, and we've taken precisely one vacation that didn't involve staying with family (or in a family beach house) since our kids were born 12 years ago. My kids spend school vacations in various camps, and even that feels like a luxury (I just spent $700 for 2 kids to be out of the house 9-3 during spring break.) Our mortgage is well below our means. I think much of the difference is family money - we have to save aggressively for college and retirement, whereas many of my neighbors and friends are counting on grandparents to fund college at least (and in many cases, private school as well.)

My best friend is a single mom. She makes roughly 32k but gets back about 10k every year from her taxes. She uses her tax money for all her vacations. Disney, Vegas, and Mexico. Same 3 vacations every year. She also does a lot of weekend get aways. At least once per month a long weekend to great wolf lodge or the beach. No clue how she can afford all of it but I know she is not in debt. She has no savings, no retirement and no college savings for her kids either.

No student loans, no private schools? I can afford decent vacations 2x per year at 180K. But, my house is paid for, and we use FCPS;

We are at 400k a year with a 4700 mortgage, nanny, etc and we can afford to vacation and save plenty for retirement and college. If you don't have enough at 400k you may want to look at your budget because something is not right.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I look at my friends on Facebook and some of them seem to be constantly on vacation. Every year they might take three trips away. My cousin sends pictures of her family in California, the Caribbean, Florida, always with a beautiful scene in the background.
We might do that every other year or so.

Our HHI is over 400k, but between saving for college and paying the mortgage of about 4k a month, we feel that we just aren't secure enough to take fancy trips. Sadly, the last trip, the most expensive we've done, was a weather flop! Also, I have flight anxiety, so there is some reluctance on my part. But logistically and financially, we don't feel set enough to do that.
We out earn these people that I am comparing myself to, maybe they are good at getting deals?

They'll never post the statement from the kids student loans on Facebook. It all evens out in the end. Keep saving and doing right by your kids. There are others like you out there - myself included. I can't post my fully funded 529 account on Facebook, but it's better than these 'look at me' social media postings. I know SO MANY people that have all the right things like houses, cars, vacations and when college comes up you get this gruff 'they'll need to take loans so they have skin in the game'.

Why wouldn't parents make use of this? http://www.virginia529.com/

My oldest niece that is not in HS yet has her college paid for as long as she stayed in the state she resides in (it isn't in the DC area). That is how her parents saved for college well in advance.

Anonymous wrote:Your mortgage is high.

That is what I was going to say....and the comment further down about being in debt would be the other reason UNLESS these people have a lot of points saved on credit cards. Just recently, I went to Nashville and stayed at a hotel for 4 nights using a mix of points and cash and saved at least $200 that way.

Everyone chooses how to spend money differently. Count your own pennies. If you want to travel more, make it happen.

Anonymous wrote:I look at my friends on Facebook and some of them seem to be constantly on vacation. Every year they might take three trips away. My cousin sends pictures of her family in California, the Caribbean, Florida, always with a beautiful scene in the background.
We might do that every other year or so.
Our HHI is over 400k, but between saving for college and paying the mortgage of about 4k a month, we feel that we just aren't secure enough to take fancy trips. Sadly, the last trip, the most expensive we've done, was a weather flop! Also, I have flight anxiety, so there is some reluctance on my part. But logistically and financially, we don't feel set enough to do that.
We out earn these people that I am comparing myself to, maybe they are good at getting deals?

They'll never post the statement from the kids student loans on Facebook. It all evens out in the end. Keep saving and doing right by your kids. There are others like you out there - myself included. I can't post my fully funded 529 account on Facebook, but it's better than these 'look at me' social media postings. I know SO MANY people that have all the right things like houses, cars, vacations and when college comes up you get this gruff 'they'll need to take loans so they have skin in the game'.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They are probably not saving for the future the way you are. When it comes time to send the kids to college, they'll be looking for financial aid or upset that they can't afford the schools their kids worked so hard to get in to. And then there's retirement. You can't take out loans for retirement, so if you haven't saved enough, it could be a rocky road.

OP, don't worry about other people. You are the smart one because you are being responsible in preparing for your future. The bonus is that you will be able to sleep at night because you will not have the financial worries that others who have spent freely will have.

Not true. Some people are still saving, maxing retirement and such. Don't think we're all just in debt funding vacations. We do two international and two domestic a year plus maybe weekend trips to relatives. We cut back on clothes, food , eating out and unnecessary items.

I don't know. I have talked to quite a few people in the last few years who appear to be making a lot of money, but are shocked at how much college costs when the time comes. The cost of tuition is only going to go up in the future. A lot of people lost a lot of their investments in 2008 and have yet to completely recover. What if that happens again just before kids are starting college? A lot of people think they are saving for the future, but the truth is they really are not saving enough and instead they are spending in the present.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Not true. Some people are still saving, maxing retirement and such. Don't think we're all just in debt funding vacations. We do two international and two domestic a year plus maybe weekend trips to relatives. We cut back on clothes, food , eating out and unnecessary items.

If we gave up on clothes and food completely, we still wouldn't come up with anywhere near enough for two international and two domestic vacations a year, let alone that plus weekend trips.

Then I highly doubt you make 400k a year with a 4k mortgage like OP. We make 300k a year, max out retirement, have decent college savings, and probably take 3 trips a year, 1-2 of which are international. We live in what some would say is a small house with one cheap car and send one kid to public school. It's very hard for me to understand how OP is making 400k a year and can't find 10k or more for travel.

We have a HHI of about $350K, but no mortgage now (paid off in 5 years). We bought a much smaller/less expensive house than we could afford so we could aggressively pay down the mortgage and do other things with our money, like save for retirement, college, and travel. We haven't traveled much the past few months due to work conflicts, but usually we plan for multiple domestic and international trips each year.

We take 3+ int'l trips a year and many, many domestic trips, usually to visit friends and family. For one, we don't have kids. I have a lot of miles and points. I'm also really frugal Re: shopping, menu planning etc. I haven't bought a new winter coat in over 4 years. I buy maybe 2 pairs of shoes a year. I'm not into purses or accessories. What I am obsessed with is travel. I research and plan to get the best value out of my money and miles.

Anonymous wrote:

Not true. Some people are still saving, maxing retirement and such. Don't think we're all just in debt funding vacations. We do two international and two domestic a year plus maybe weekend trips to relatives. We cut back on clothes, food , eating out and unnecessary items.

If we gave up on clothes and food completely, we still wouldn't come up with anywhere near enough for two international and two domestic vacations a year, let alone that plus weekend trips.

Anonymous wrote:They are probably not saving for the future the way you are. When it comes time to send the kids to college, they'll be looking for financial aid or upset that they can't afford the schools their kids worked so hard to get in to. And then there's retirement. You can't take out loans for retirement, so if you haven't saved enough, it could be a rocky road.

OP, don't worry about other people. You are the smart one because you are being responsible in preparing for your future. The bonus is that you will be able to sleep at night because you will not have the financial worries that others who have spent freely will have.

Not true. Some people are still saving, maxing retirement and such. Don't think we're all just in debt funding vacations. We do two international and two domestic a year plus maybe weekend trips to relatives. We cut back on clothes, food , eating out and unnecessary items.

They are probably not saving for the future the way you are. When it comes time to send the kids to college, they'll be looking for financial aid or upset that they can't afford the schools their kids worked so hard to get in to. And then there's retirement. You can't take out loans for retirement, so if you haven't saved enough, it could be a rocky road.

OP, don't worry about other people. You are the smart one because you are being responsible in preparing for your future. The bonus is that you will be able to sleep at night because you will not have the financial worries that others who have spent freely will have.