Anonymous wrote:Interfaith couple..we are not raising our children as "both" but we are raising them to know the traditions and thinking of both. When they are ready, they can decide what works for them..if anything. It is quite important to us for them to respect and understand religious differences and know there are many ways to lead a good life.

We are raising our kids as both. Two races, two languages, two favorite sports teams, and two religions.

What will they choose when they grow up? Only G-d knows...

Anonymous wrote:Interfaith couple..we are not raising our children as "both" but we are raising them to know the traditions and thinking of both. When they are ready, they can decide what works for them..if anything. It is quite important to us for them to respect and understand religious differences and know there are many ways to lead a good life.

+1

Interfaith couple..we are not raising our children as "both" but we are raising them to know the traditions and thinking of both. When they are ready, they can decide what works for them..if anything. It is quite important to us for them to respect and understand religious differences and know there are many ways to lead a good life.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Self hatred? Convenience?

Hardly. The Jewish women I know that have married gentile men did so for love and compatibility.

That would be convenience, then.

If you define loving people as doing what is convenient.

Compatibility you mentioned too. And probably pressure from the in-laws.

I'm Jewish and DH is Catholic (not practicing). I married my DH because I loved him. I initially worried about my parents accepting him but they fell in love with him too. He's an awesome guy and it would have been a huge loss to have walked away from him over religion. It was tough in the early years because neither of us wanted to ask the other to give up his/her religious traditions. We celebrated both sets of holidays but since I observe and DH doesn't, we eventually settled on raising the kids Jewish. They all started religious school in K or 1st. Out of respect for DH, we continue to celebrate the Christian holidays but in a secular way. About 1/4 of our friends are interfaith. In most cases the kids are Jewish. As a matter of fact, several mom friends converted to Judaism. We also have a number of interfaith siblings and cousins but only 1 is raising the kids Christian.

Any religion that is watered down loses followers. For example, if you are a Catholic mother who sends your kid to CCD but you fail to instruct your children in the home (don't make church attendance a priority, do not pray as a family, do not discuss/study your faith or the bible) your children will probably fall from the church in adulthood and potentially marry out of their faith. And, of course, religion in the home doesn't even guarantee that your children will keep a faith when the world we live is so secular. The majority of Jews in the U.S. are reform. They don't keep kosher, don't observe Shabbat, rarely attend services, etc. And then, the typical Jewish man or woman, is surrounded my nonjews all day. The pool of Jewish partners to choose from is quite small. So, if religion was not a priority growing up, it certainly won't be a priority when it comes to matters of the heart. I think it is sad that the Jewish population has not only suffered discrimination and attacks of genocide over the centuries, but also are dwindling through interfaith marriages. But no Jewish man or woman, who was raised with little faith or minimal awareness about his/her culture, is going to feel personally responsible for the future of kial Israel.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why are you seeing it as "giving up?" Maybe it's a sincere choice - or they weren't religious to begin with.

Why are you so bothered by the personal choices of others?

NP. Because it's a core belief of Judaism that klal Yisrael is one people, all connected and responsible for each other.There's no such thing as a "personal choice" that doesn't affect anybody else in Judaism, even if we don't see it or understand how. And it's part of the daily prayers to ask G-d to help us repent, come closer to Torah, and gather in the exiles so that Moshiach can come and bring about the final redemption. Every person who marries out and falls away from keeping Torah and mitzvos takes us one step farther away from that.

That's what bothers me, while fully recognizing that non-Orthodox people don't see it that way and don't care what we think.

Lady, you're nuts. Moshi-nuts.

Anonymous wrote:Because religion is fake?

+1

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why are you seeing it as "giving up?" Maybe it's a sincere choice - or they weren't religious to begin with.

Why are you so bothered by the personal choices of others?

NP. Because it's a core belief of Judaism that klal Yisrael is one people, all connected and responsible for each other.There's no such thing as a "personal choice" that doesn't affect anybody else in Judaism, even if we don't see it or understand how. And it's part of the daily prayers to ask G-d to help us repent, come closer to Torah, and gather in the exiles so that Moshiach can come and bring about the final redemption. Every person who marries out and falls away from keeping Torah and mitzvos takes us one step farther away from that.

That's what bothers me, while fully recognizing that non-Orthodox people don't see it that way and don't care what we think.

I never really knew that about Judiasm. Interesting. It makes me think much of religion is doomed to failure then, in this country, where we are free to choose our religion, or choose to have none.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Self hatred? Convenience?

Hardly. The Jewish women I know that have married gentile men did so for love and compatibility.

That would be convenience, then.

If you define loving people as doing what is convenient.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Self hatred? Convenience?

Hardly. The Jewish women I know that have married gentile men did so for love and compatibility.

That would be convenience, then.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why are you seeing it as "giving up?" Maybe it's a sincere choice - or they weren't religious to begin with.

Why are you so bothered by the personal choices of others?

NP. Because it's a core belief of Judaism that klal Yisrael is one people, all connected and responsible for each other.There's no such thing as a "personal choice" that doesn't affect anybody else in Judaism, even if we don't see it or understand how. And it's part of the daily prayers to ask G-d to help us repent, come closer to Torah, and gather in the exiles so that Moshiach can come and bring about the final redemption. Every person who marries out and falls away from keeping Torah and mitzvos takes us one step farther away from that.

That's what bothers me, while fully recognizing that non-Orthodox people don't see it that way and don't care what we think.

With this explanation, now I can fully see why some people would want to... branch out.

Religion is binding and constrictive. I am so happy I married out of mine and am not religious at all.

Anonymous wrote:Why are you seeing it as "giving up?" Maybe it's a sincere choice - or they weren't religious to begin with.

Why are you so bothered by the personal choices of others?

NP. Because it's a core belief of Judaism that klal Yisrael is one people, all connected and responsible for each other.There's no such thing as a "personal choice" that doesn't affect anybody else in Judaism, even if we don't see it or understand how. And it's part of the daily prayers to ask G-d to help us repent, come closer to Torah, and gather in the exiles so that Moshiach can come and bring about the final redemption. Every person who marries out and falls away from keeping Torah and mitzvos takes us one step farther away from that.

That's what bothers me, while fully recognizing that non-Orthodox people don't see it that way and don't care what we think.

Anonymous wrote:Catholic woman here

Interesting--I've actually seen it more with Jewish men.

But I don't understand it either--raising kids "both religions." My best friend growing up had a Protestant mother and a Jewish father, and they celebrated both. But really, it caused a lot of turmoil in their marriage, and now my friend does not follow either religion...and actually has a lot of contempt for religion as a whole.

Sounds to me like your best friend's parents weren't on the same page before they got married. That always leads to turmoil. Your friend had a poor marriage role model.