I adopted 2 kittens from a shelter. It took them about a year to want to come sit on my lap or sleep in bed with me. One of them sits with me much more than the other. So give it more time. Your cat may not change, but you never know. Neither of my cats likes to be picked up.

Anonymous wrote:Cats do not provide cuddles for food.

Cats get to know you and when they are relaxed, they come to you. THEY COME TO YOU. You do not initiate -- they do. They are the initators of cuddles. Always.

Start by creating an environment in which your cat wants to come to you. Lie down on the couch. Make yourself cosy. Make yourself cuddle-able. Stop aggressing toward your cat. The more you pick your cat up and aggressively try to cuddle it, the more it will avoid you.

I lay myself down and this cat only try to attack my feet. He is not a nice cat and if he is not going to cuddle we will have problems.

Anonymous wrote:Ultimately the cat will show "love" to the one who feeds it.

Do the cuddles come if I am feeding him then? I feed him all the time. Maybe I am feeding him but he no likes the food I am giving? Last night he did sit next to me but he only wanted to eat my hand.

Ultimately the cat will show "love" to the one who feeds it.

Experienced cat mom here. Give him time. It took my lap cat months to settle down.

Try feliway plugins and catnip too. It will help him relax.

He may never be a lap cat, but you can have a relationship. See what works for your cat.

Best cat toy is a fishing rod with a soft mouse toy to cast and reel in. Play with the cat regularly. Also cat treats at intervals . Kitty will bond with you better .

Cats don't like to be picked up, generally. Especially when they are just getting used to a new place. And they really don't like to be force held.

You are getting good advice here - give the cat some space and let him come to you. My cat took several months to really even tolerate petting, and then a couple more to become a lap cat. Even now, he only wants pets/cuddles on his terms, and doesn't like to be picked up. He's biting you because you're ignoring his signals that he does not want to be held.

If he's attacking you at random, it also sounds like you need to get him some toys and work out some energy. The laser is always a favorite. I would also recommend getting some other things - like a bed or little cat house so he has a place to hide.

Cats do not provide cuddles for food.

Cats get to know you and when they are relaxed, they come to you. THEY COME TO YOU. You do not initiate -- they do. They are the initators of cuddles. Always.

Start by creating an environment in which your cat wants to come to you. Lie down on the couch. Make yourself cosy. Make yourself cuddle-able. Stop aggressing toward your cat. The more you pick your cat up and aggressively try to cuddle it, the more it will avoid you.

Cat just meows then makes angry attack at my toes or ankles even though he has plenty of food. I tried to hold him for evening cuddles and he was only wanting to bite on my hand. My fear is he will kill a 2nd cat with this attacking and biting.

MyDD's cat loves me, tolerates her, hates my partner, and is terrified of the younger sib. They are a crapshoot, but so are humans. I do all the feeds, never yell, and if awoken at odd hours will rub ears for 20 minutes.

Anonymous wrote:OP have you tried a good neck and head scratch?

I have never been to a massage. Will this help?

OP have you tried a good neck and head scratch?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I've been there. My advice is get him a kitten, a little girl. He will love her, and she will love you. I had 12 great years this way!

Adopt second cat to lure out cuddles?

Yep - except this male cat won't be the human cuddler, but a female kitten coming into the family might be.

Cats are individuals. Sorry. Not all have a cuddly personality. It's not you. It's not even about the relationship between this cat and you. Sounds like he/she is not the cuddling type. However you will know if the cat likes you - if it's allowed to go out and it comes back, it like you well enough. See when given the choice, the opportunity, cats choose their owners. There is absolutely no such thing as a "lost cat" - they just ditched their owner and found someone else who takes care of them and they like better!

Anonymous wrote:I've been there. My advice is get him a kitten, a little girl. He will love her, and she will love you. I had 12 great years this way!

Adopt second cat to lure out cuddles?