Don't cruises have those kids' clubs where you drop off your kid and you don't see them for the whole day?

Not with my parents or mother-in-law because they are all older (80's). We are both significantly younger than our sibs and we had to wait to have children later, so there's a big age gap.

That said, we have a number of friends who I could see might answer differently. We see these friends fairly often because our kids are close in age and some are in their 20's and have cooperative grandparents in the 50's to early 60's. A couple of these grandparents have a very good relationship with the grandkids because the grandmother was daycare for the grandkids when the mother went back to work. One kid, was dropped off at grandma and grandpa's house every day because their house was on the way to work and grandpa was not very able and couldn't leave the house easily. She had always been a SAHM and was very comfortable caring for the grandson in the house where her kids grew up. The other family, the grandmother came to the family's house daily because that was easier for them. In these two cases, if the grandmother asked to take the kid on a cruise, I could see them agreeing. First, the relationship is already there. The grandparent can control the child (has to do it every day while the parents are at work) and the child heeds the grandparent. All important factors. In OP's case, none of those are there; the grandfather doesn't have a relationship, there's no guarantee the grandson will heed the grandfather and no evidence that the grandfather can control the child.

But onto the other portion, the cruise. Having been on a cruise with my then 3 yo twins, I think a cruise is actually a better form of vacation for grandparents to take a grandchild on that most. If they go on a cruise with a decent kids program (RCI has such a program), then actually the grandparents can build in breaks by taking the child to the kids program periodically for that break. Also the buffet is a good way to handle even a picky eater as they can get whatever is needed for meals easily. If the child doesn't like what's served first, no problem, just go get something else. Also, there are quite a number of good options to keep the kid entertained on a cruise. The pool deck including the kids pools are pretty good options. There are usually shipboard entertainment that they can see and do together from bands, to games to classes. I've seen kids watch entranced at the towel folding class or the ice sculpting class. There are excursions that are designed for kids and seniors (we took a couple of bus tours with interesting stops with my parents and the kids, also took the kids to beaches or zoos/animal habitats that had lunch included, etc). Cruises are designed to be all-inclusive and so many details are just handled and included. The grandparents don't have to worry about details that they forgot or didn't think of, they often aren't added expenses and are easy to handle. Regarding the safety issue, nowadays so many cruise ships are so large, it's not hard to keep the kids away from the outer decks except when embarking and debarking. In many cases, a cruise is easier like being spoonfed entertainment and events.

Anonymous wrote:
A vacation on land, no.
A cruise, even less so.
Visions of kid toppling overboard.

If your child has wonderfully attentive and alert grandparents, YMMV.

Visions of kids toppling over is what I thought, too, and my parents are fairly attentive (mom much more than dad.) But when you aren't used to watching a toddler, and in a new environment, things can happen quickly.

I would be ok with my parents taking them on a land trip, though.

Anonymous wrote:I'm sort of surprised by the answers here. I would totally let my in laws or my parents take my 3 year old on a Disney cruise. Have you been on one? They're totally programmed and lots of planned activities. Are most people's parents infirm? We left our 3 yo and 18 month old with them for 11 days when we went over seas. Kids loved, they loved spending so much time with the kids (then happily gave them back).

I don't think adults have to be infirm to not be up to handling an active toddler for many days on a cruise or anywhere else. I think the point is they may THINK they are up to it, only to discover it is exhausting. I know very few grandparents that would be up to the 11-day situation you described.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A trip somewhere? Sure, I would let my parents take my 3 year old. They're barely 60 and very active. A cruise? No, but I can't imagine they would want to take a toddler on a cruise. My in laws ... Nowhere. They are way too flighty.

OP. My FIL is 77! Very good physical condition. Mental condition is lacking, though. The woman he went on the cruise with is in her 60s, and babysits her grandchildren often. But they are older kids, not in need of constant supervision, plus there can be a big difference between age 65 and 77 among the healthiest of people. (So I get that you would be OK with your young parents taking your child on a vacation ).

But I don't think I'd let anyone take my son on a cruise because like pp said, once there, you're stuck.

Yeah, I think 60-65 with a toddler is way different than 75+, even if they are active and young at heart adults.

But honestly, I don't even want to be trapped on a cruise with a toddler. I definitely wouldn't want my parents or in laws stuck with no way out. Not that I think they'd die or something, but it sounds like it could potentially be excrutiatingly miserable.

A vacation on land, no.
A cruise, even less so.
Visions of kid toppling overboard.

If your child has wonderfully attentive and alert grandparents, YMMV.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No. My parents and ILs like to sit around and read their iPad or phones. I could see my kids getting lost or going overboard or drowning.

+1. Hell No.

My ILs lose my kids all the time when "watching" them at our house (like while I'm cooking).

How do they lose your kids? You're all in the same house.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No. My parents and ILs like to sit around and read their iPad or phones. I could see my kids getting lost or going overboard or drowning.

+1. Hell No.

My ILs lose my kids all the time when "watching" them at our house (like while I'm cooking).

I'm sort of surprised by the answers here. I would totally let my in laws or my parents take my 3 year old on a Disney cruise. Have you been on one? They're totally programmed and lots of planned activities. Are most people's parents infirm? We left our 3 yo and 18 month old with them for 11 days when we went over seas. Kids loved, they loved spending so much time with the kids (then happily gave them back).

My parents took my kids on a Disney cruise when my youngest was six. My mom WANTED to take them all to New York City--- but I said no way to that. My parents do not have enough energy and I could see it bein a disaster. I suggested either a cruise or a resort like beaches with "kids clubs" because I j we my parents would get worn out and would need a break from the kids.

But yeah, my youngest was six. I would not have been ok with it at 3.

Way too much for a 3 year old to get into on a cruise. And I want to vacation with my kids. I have elderly (very) inlaws, but I really can't even fathom letting anyone who was more than a few years removed from full time toddler/preschooler care do it.

Not on your life. My MIL is in her 80s and can't remember our child's name. Nope. Not happening.

Anonymous wrote:A trip somewhere? Sure, I would let my parents take my 3 year old. They're barely 60 and very active. A cruise? No, but I can't imagine they would want to take a toddler on a cruise. My in laws ... Nowhere. They are way too flighty.

OP. My FIL is 77! Very good physical condition. Mental condition is lacking, though. The woman he went on the cruise with is in her 60s, and babysits her grandchildren often. But they are older kids, not in need of constant supervision, plus there can be a big difference between age 65 and 77 among the healthiest of people. (So I get that you would be OK with your young parents taking your child on a vacation ).

But I don't think I'd let anyone take my son on a cruise because like pp said, once there, you're stuck.

Anonymous wrote:He only wants to spend time with your kid if they're alone together? That would weird me out.

Yeah, it's a problem. It weirds me out too.

A trip somewhere? Sure, I would let my parents take my 3 year old. They're barely 60 and very active. A cruise? No, but I can't imagine they would want to take a toddler on a cruise. My in laws ... Nowhere. They are way too flighty.