I was going to answer the AA mom similarly...

AA boys are subject to over disciplining. You are going to want the protections for your child that come along with having an IEP. Please research the legal rights your child has in school when they are a child with a disability vs a "bad" child.

I am an AA mother of an ASD child (bi-racial) and let me tell you, you have to know your rights. As with everything!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The school is well aware that parents do not report known development issues with new students. If the child barely talks, they are going to notice it very quickly. The school will begin their own evaluation process and develop and IEP for the student. Why waste all that time when an evaluation has already taken place?

A school can't do evaluations without the parents' consent. I wonder what will happen when the teachers approach the parents with their concerns?

OP, how old is the child?

There is a family like this at our school. The parents refuse to allow their child to be evaluated. The school has provided extensive 1:1 tutoring for almost two yrs/grades and the child still is not learning anything and getting further and further behind academically. It's very sad.

How do you know all of this? School evaluations are not some kind of magic. It's possible the parents are getting their own private assistance, or the 1:1 tutoring is the same that the child would get otherwise.

It's a small community and people know. The parents are not getting any assistance for their kid: They like the neighborhood feel and convenience of the school and don't seem too concerned about academics.

You sure seem like you must be a great mind reader. Have you thought of monetizing that?

I've heard both sides so I don't need to read minds.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think it's a very personal decision and people should not be jumping to conclusions. Some children's needs are so mild that they will not cause any disruption to the class or teacher and parents would prefer to work with the child with private providers. I think there's absolutely nothing wrong with this especially since it's possible these children's issues are so mild they will be the ones to lose their diagnosis in a few years.

As a parent of a AA male child who was just diagnosed as autistic, I do not plan on disclosing this information to his school unless it is absolutely necessary. AA children, especially boys get labeled early on and it sticks with them for their entire academic life. Unless my child has obvious issues when he starts school (currently 2 years old), I do not plan on sharing this information. We are currently engaging private providers and hopefully by the time he starts school we will have things in a manageable situation. If not, we will cross that path when we get there.

As another parent of an AA boy (teen) with a disability, I hear your concerns. I think that you are making a good decision to pursue private therapies and delay the decision until you know more about how your parent will function once he gets to school.

Unfortunately, however, the reality is the AA boys in particular are exposed to both over identification AND under identification, sometimes both at the same time with the same child. In my experience, and looking at the data, AA boys are more likely to be identified as having developmental delays, intellectual disabilities, and emotional disturbance in particular. However, academic delays are often overlooked because of low expectations, and behaviors due to things like ASD and ADHD, are often attributed to poor parenting, or a child being "bad" and treated punitively, rather than appropriately.

I have been a teacher and am now a parent to a child with mild SN. Always disclose. You want to set your child up for success. The teachers will figure out the needs and when a parent was open and honest from the start there is a lot more trust and it makes for a warmer school-parent relationship. You may think they won't figure it out, but honestly teachers are well trained and it becomes clear-even mild issues.

Anonymous wrote:You can't possibly know this. I'm sure our neighbors thought something similar about us, but the truth was we were begging the school to evaluate and give us some help and it was the school that was refusing to help. Eventually we had to get a lawyer involved.

We also had our DC in a ton of private services but never talked about this with neighbors. If they had asked we would have told them but people just made assumptions.

This was our experience.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The school is well aware that parents do not report known development issues with new students. If the child barely talks, they are going to notice it very quickly. The school will begin their own evaluation process and develop and IEP for the student. Why waste all that time when an evaluation has already taken place?

A school can't do evaluations without the parents' consent. I wonder what will happen when the teachers approach the parents with their concerns?

OP, how old is the child?

The child is 5.

This doesn't make a lot of sense. How could a school have the resources to provide 1:1 tutoring for two years without an IEP?

You are confusing children. The 5-year-old is the child of OP's friend. The child receiving 1:1 tutoring is someone a PP knows. Keep up.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The school is well aware that parents do not report known development issues with new students. If the child barely talks, they are going to notice it very quickly. The school will begin their own evaluation process and develop and IEP for the student. Why waste all that time when an evaluation has already taken place?

A school can't do evaluations without the parents' consent. I wonder what will happen when the teachers approach the parents with their concerns?

OP, how old is the child?

The child is 5.

This doesn't make a lot of sense. How could a school have the resources to provide 1:1 tutoring for two years without an IEP?

You can't possibly know this. I'm sure our neighbors thought something similar about us, but the truth was we were begging the school to evaluate and give us some help and it was the school that was refusing to help. Eventually we had to get a lawyer involved.

We also had our DC in a ton of private services but never talked about this with neighbors. If they had asked we would have told them but people just made assumptions.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The school is well aware that parents do not report known development issues with new students. If the child barely talks, they are going to notice it very quickly. The school will begin their own evaluation process and develop and IEP for the student. Why waste all that time when an evaluation has already taken place?

A school can't do evaluations without the parents' consent. I wonder what will happen when the teachers approach the parents with their concerns?

OP, how old is the child?

There is a family like this at our school. The parents refuse to allow their child to be evaluated. The school has provided extensive 1:1 tutoring for almost two yrs/grades and the child still is not learning anything and getting further and further behind academically. It's very sad.

How do you know all of this? School evaluations are not some kind of magic. It's possible the parents are getting their own private assistance, or the 1:1 tutoring is the same that the child would get otherwise.

It's a small community and people know. The parents are not getting any assistance for their kid: They like the neighborhood feel and convenience of the school and don't seem too concerned about academics.

You sure seem like you must be a great mind reader. Have you thought of monetizing that?

Anonymous wrote:I think it's a very personal decision and people should not be jumping to conclusions. Some children's needs are so mild that they will not cause any disruption to the class or teacher and parents would prefer to work with the child with private providers. I think there's absolutely nothing wrong with this especially since it's possible these children's issues are so mild they will be the ones to lose their diagnosis in a few years.

As a parent of a AA male child who was just diagnosed as autistic, I do not plan on disclosing this information to his school unless it is absolutely necessary. AA children, especially boys get labeled early on and it sticks with them for their entire academic life. Unless my child has obvious issues when he starts school (currently 2 years old), I do not plan on sharing this information. We are currently engaging private providers and hopefully by the time he starts school we will have things in a manageable situation. If not, we will cross that path when we get there.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The school is well aware that parents do not report known development issues with new students. If the child barely talks, they are going to notice it very quickly. The school will begin their own evaluation process and develop and IEP for the student. Why waste all that time when an evaluation has already taken place?

A school can't do evaluations without the parents' consent. I wonder what will happen when the teachers approach the parents with their concerns?

OP, how old is the child?

There is a family like this at our school. The parents refuse to allow their child to be evaluated. The school has provided extensive 1:1 tutoring for almost two yrs/grades and the child still is not learning anything and getting further and further behind academically. It's very sad.

How do you know all of this? School evaluations are not some kind of magic. It's possible the parents are getting their own private assistance, or the 1:1 tutoring is the same that the child would get otherwise.

It's a small community and people know. The parents are not getting any assistance for their kid: They like the neighborhood feel and convenience of the school and don't seem too concerned about academics.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The school is well aware that parents do not report known development issues with new students. If the child barely talks, they are going to notice it very quickly. The school will begin their own evaluation process and develop and IEP for the student. Why waste all that time when an evaluation has already taken place?

A school can't do evaluations without the parents' consent. I wonder what will happen when the teachers approach the parents with their concerns?

OP, how old is the child?

There is a family like this at our school. The parents refuse to allow their child to be evaluated. The school has provided extensive 1:1 tutoring for almost two yrs/grades and the child still is not learning anything and getting further and further behind academically. It's very sad.

How do you know all of this? School evaluations are not some kind of magic. It's possible the parents are getting their own private assistance, or the 1:1 tutoring is the same that the child would get otherwise.

NP. This could be true. But without an official IEP the school won't be getting additional state or federal funding it is entitled to to help cover the cost of those services.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The school is well aware that parents do not report known development issues with new students. If the child barely talks, they are going to notice it very quickly. The school will begin their own evaluation process and develop and IEP for the student. Why waste all that time when an evaluation has already taken place?

A school can't do evaluations without the parents' consent. I wonder what will happen when the teachers approach the parents with their concerns?

OP, how old is the child?

There is a family like this at our school. The parents refuse to allow their child to be evaluated. The school has provided extensive 1:1 tutoring for almost two yrs/grades and the child still is not learning anything and getting further and further behind academically. It's very sad.

How do you know all of this? School evaluations are not some kind of magic. It's possible the parents are getting their own private assistance, or the 1:1 tutoring is the same that the child would get otherwise.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The school is well aware that parents do not report known development issues with new students. If the child barely talks, they are going to notice it very quickly. The school will begin their own evaluation process and develop and IEP for the student. Why waste all that time when an evaluation has already taken place?

A school can't do evaluations without the parents' consent. I wonder what will happen when the teachers approach the parents with their concerns?

OP, how old is the child?

The child is 5.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The school is well aware that parents do not report known development issues with new students. If the child barely talks, they are going to notice it very quickly. The school will begin their own evaluation process and develop and IEP for the student. Why waste all that time when an evaluation has already taken place?

A school can't do evaluations without the parents' consent. I wonder what will happen when the teachers approach the parents with their concerns?

OP, how old is the child?

There is a family like this at our school. The parents refuse to allow their child to be evaluated. The school has provided extensive 1:1 tutoring for almost two yrs/grades and the child still is not learning anything and getting further and further behind academically. It's very sad.