I make a mental note to call my mother every other Monday. It's a good 5-10 minutes of local stuff and my kids. I am an only child and my children call her once a month from school.

As an experiment, I stopped calling her to see if she would call me. We went 8 months without talking until we attended my son's graduation from law school.

Now I am back to setting calendar to call her every other Monday. That is the extent of my family.

We talk to my parents at least 4x a week. (I've always been close to them, and my mom was DS's caregiver 2-3 times a week when we lived close by, so they have a close relationship.)

We talk to DH's family maybe once a month, more if there's a birthday. It's a very different--though not negative--family dynamic.

Not so often on the phone - maybe once per month with my Dad and much less often with my siblings. However, we email frequently and put updates on Facebook so it's not like there's a huge lack of contact.

*now

Stupid phone.

I talk to my mom on the phone 3x/year. Her birthday, Mother's Day, and Christmas. And I have the kids do most of the talking. I text her a few times a month, mostly with kid updates.

I talk to my dad usually just on Christmas. Text a few times a month, again usually with kid updates, although he and I have gotten a bit closer in the last few years since I know work in the same field he came from and he has good career advice.

As rarely as I can get away with without this being noticed or causing a rift. My parents are fairly emotionally toxic and I find limited contact easier to handle, but I'm not willing to hurt them by cutting off contact or letting them know how much I dislike the direction most of our conversations usually take.

Daily to my mom. My dad is dead. I call her often while I'm driving to work (hands free). It's my one work-free, kid-free time of day.

I try to talk to my mom on the phone 3x a week or so since my dad passed. Mostly it's to let her share whatever is going on in her life, so I do it in the car on my way home from work. I find that makes me less resentful of frequent calls, plus there is a ready out of the conversation when I get home.

Every day to my mom. Maybe every other week to my dad. Mostly he will get on the phone when I am talking to my mom to ask me some random question or tell me a random fact ?

My parents live 30 minutes away. I talk to my mom 2-3 times a week by phone and my dad once a week, usually to discuss weekend plans as we visit them almost every weekend.

I talk to my dad about the same as you do yours. He's not a phone person. My mom died a decade ago, but I imagine I'd talk to her more.

I talk to my siblings more often, but that's most often over text or gchat. My sisters and I might talk on the phone once a week max (sometimes for hours, sometimes just to ask some inane question) but we're in touch several times a week. My brothers I speak to maybe monthly, and email a couple times a month.

Have you tried getting your parents to text/email? I've found that to be a great way to stay in touch on a daily basis without having to find a time both parties are free to talk. Even my 75 year old dad has kind of gotten into it.

Anonymous wrote:I have always been really close to my family, but I live across the country so I certainly don't see them more than twice a year, and don't get to talk to them as much as I would like. Life is just busy and the time difference is hard.

I probably talk to my dad 2 times per month for 5-10 mins, my mom 2 times per month for 10-15 mins, and my sister maybe once a month max for like 5 mins. I would especially love to talk to my mom more... But I can't seem to find the time. I have young kids and work full time (as do my parents and sister).

If your family doesn't live close by, how often do you talk to them?

Hi OP. I realize this may not be the kind of advice you're looking for, and I'm coming out of left field, but if you want to talk to your mom more, please make it a priority. Call every other day for 5-10 minutes or so, and you will feel more connected. Life happens, people get older, and you don't want this to be a permanent regret. Do the best you can, even if it seems like an inconvenience/ keeps you up 5-10 minutes later, and you will thank yourself later, I promise you.

When my dad lived in DC, we had dinner together once a week. Now that he's retired and moved, not very often. He's not much for phone calls or e-mail.

My mom, pretty irregularly. We went 7 (glorious!) months without seeing each other with only a handful of texts and e-mails. I think we only spoke on the phone twice. Now that she is also moving, the contact has been more frequent since we're trying to clean out her house.

One brother I call on holidays. The other, not at all.

Probably not more than 2 days goes by without talking to my family. But that means mom/dad/ sister (we whats app everyday actually) so its 3 different homes/ calls that can spread out.

We are all busy but since we don't live near each other, its just our priority, YMMV.

It changed as circumstances changed. In college, it was every other week for 6 minutes (mid 80's). In my early adult years to 6-7 years ago, it was once or twice a week with my parents and once or twice a week with my sister. As my parents aged and things changed it was more frequent and as frequently as once a day. As of last Sept, dad has moved in with us and we talk to my sister every day at least once if not twice. I assume once he passes, my sister and I will slowly go back to a few times a week.