Anonymous
Post 01/24/2016 08:42     Subject: Huge change in sex life
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I wish he was my husband. I hate sex.


No. I'm betting you hate sex with your DH. Sex itself is pretty fun. Sex with DH isn't all that. Doesn't matter who DH is. How awesome he is. What a great father he is. Women need a man for the home (house husband) and a man in between the sheets.

Really. You are just bored with DH.


You're right


This is a true feeling (as long as at some point you did like sex; if not, maybe you are with the wrong sex or are asexual). But if you did want sex before, then yes. The "Excitement" is gone. I'd say you want another man between the sheets, but being a responsible grown up in this society usually means that won't happen. I have been fantasizing about smart funny musicians and actors, and that keeps me out of trouble. It would help if my spouse wanted to have sex more than once every two months, though, too.
Anonymous
Post 01/24/2016 01:15     Subject: Huge change in sex life
Anonymous wrote:In the last year or so, my husband rarely initiates if ever and straight out denies my for sex when I bring up the idea. I have tried to talk to him about it multiple times (at least 20) and he makes excuses why he doesn't want to talk about the situation or somehow says it's my fault. I've asked him point blank of his is having and affair, which he denies. Our baseline used to be 3 times a week, now maybe twice a month. I'm upset, sad, lonely etc. Both of us still exercise multiple times a week and he has no other signs of depression or huge amounts of insurmountable stress. Thoughts? Advice? He literally just ignores me.


He's either having an affair or he's thinking about it. It's someone at the new job.

Both more and less sex can be signs of an affair. Generally, it's a change in the marital sex life that's significant.

Has he made changes in his appearance?

This is a great article about warning signs.

http://beyondaffairs.com/suspicion-confrontation/signs-of-infidelity/
Anonymous
Post 01/23/2016 15:12     Subject: Huge change in sex life
Anonymous wrote:rarely initiates


Poor you. Welcome to the fucking club.
Anonymous
Post 01/23/2016 14:14     Subject: Huge change in sex life
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I wish he was my husband. I hate sex.


No. I'm betting you hate sex with your DH. Sex itself is pretty fun. Sex with DH isn't all that. Doesn't matter who DH is. How awesome he is. What a great father he is. Women need a man for the home (house husband) and a man in between the sheets.

Really. You are just bored with DH.


You're right
Anonymous
Post 01/23/2016 13:53     Subject: Huge change in sex life
Anonymous wrote:I wish he was my husband. I hate sex.


No. I'm betting you hate sex with your DH. Sex itself is pretty fun. Sex with DH isn't all that. Doesn't matter who DH is. How awesome he is. What a great father he is. Women need a man for the home (house husband) and a man in between the sheets.

Really. You are just bored with DH.
Anonymous
Post 01/23/2016 13:51     Subject: Huge change in sex life
Can you spice it up a bit in the bedroom? Maybe he's bored.
Anonymous
Post 01/23/2016 13:37     Subject: Huge change in sex life
I wish he was my husband. I hate sex.
Anonymous
Post 01/23/2016 13:08     Subject: Huge change in sex life
Anonymous wrote:Sometimes you get tired of sex with the same person and it becomes a chore. That can be depressing and frightening because you want a stable life but you are sick that the feeling isn't the same excitement . It's a horrible sinking feeling and sex gets old with almost everybody to some extent.


As a man, I don't understand this. I love and crave having sex with my wife. To me, she is the sexiest woman on earth. It's been 18 years and both our bodies have changed, but I still love nothing more than to tear it up.
Anonymous
Post 01/23/2016 12:54     Subject: Huge change in sex life
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Sometimes you get tired of sex with the same person and it becomes a chore. That can be depressing and frightening because you want a stable life but you are sick that the feeling isn't the same excitement . It's a horrible sinking feeling and sex gets old with almost everybody to some extent.


Phil Robinson of duck dynasty said something that stuck with me. He has had a wild life and trouble in his marriage . His marriage now seems very healthy and sweet . He said when he fixed his marriage he had to come to grips with the fact that "my sex life as I knew it....was over."


That is depressing and weird to me -- DW married 18 years.


Life ain't a fairy tale.. That depresses some.
Anonymous
Post 01/23/2016 12:52     Subject: Huge change in sex life
Anonymous wrote:In the last year or so, my husband rarely initiates if ever and straight out denies my for sex when I bring up the idea. I have tried to talk to him about it multiple times (at least 20) and he makes excuses why he doesn't want to talk about the situation or somehow says it's my fault. I've asked him point blank of his is having and affair, which he denies. Our baseline used to be 3 times a week, now maybe twice a month. I'm upset, sad, lonely etc. Both of us still exercise multiple times a week and he has no other signs of depression or huge amounts of insurmountable stress. Thoughts? Advice? He literally just ignores me.


When he says it's your fault, does he give any specifics? With your new more stressful job, do you earn more than he does? Did you move for your new job? Does he resent having taken a step down work wise?
Anonymous
Post 01/23/2016 12:29     Subject: Huge change in sex life
Did you gain weight, cut your hair short, stop wearing makeup or anything that would make him see you as less visually attactive?
Anonymous
Post 01/23/2016 12:11     Subject: Huge change in sex life
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Sometimes you get tired of sex with the same person and it becomes a chore. That can be depressing and frightening because you want a stable life but you are sick that the feeling isn't the same excitement . It's a horrible sinking feeling and sex gets old with almost everybody to some extent.


Phil Robinson of duck dynasty said something that stuck with me. He has had a wild life and trouble in his marriage . His marriage now seems very healthy and sweet . He said when he fixed his marriage he had to come to grips with the fact that "my sex life as I knew it....was over."


That is depressing and weird to me -- DW married 18 years.
Anonymous
Post 01/23/2016 12:07     Subject: Huge change in sex life
Anonymous wrote:No medications and kids are 2/10 and we had tons more sex when baby was an infant.


Did he say specifically no meds?
Anonymous
Post 01/23/2016 12:07     Subject: Huge change in sex life
No medications and kids are 2/10 and we had tons more sex when baby was an infant.