eh, it's incredibly rude to use "etiquette" as an excuse to be dismissive of the good news of others. If family wants to throw a baby shower for an expectant mom - that is fine! Babies are precious and wonderful news .

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:First off it isn't proper to have family members throw showers.

Just accept the fact you don't have friends to invite and focus on what you have going on in your life. Count your blessings. Don't make someone throw you a party and invite people you aren't close with. That's lame and you'll feel awkward. You'll live without a baby shower.

Incorrect this is old school. OP my family is throwing me a coed shower. Really looking forward to it since I had been dreading an all girls shower when I don't have many close girlfriends to invite.

I love how people try to justify their tacky behavior by saying the rules don't apply anymore.

PP, did you hand write all your holiday cards and personalize notes in each? Do you write thank you notes to the hostess of every social event that you are invited to? Do you follow every rule of formal etiquette? Or only the ones you deem important?

Yes, and no, I'm not a Southern lady. Just grew up in DC, and that was how it's was done here. My friends didn't have family members throw their showers. I will throw showers for my friends' kids when the time comes.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:First off it isn't proper to have family members throw showers.

Just accept the fact you don't have friends to invite and focus on what you have going on in your life. Count your blessings. Don't make someone throw you a party and invite people you aren't close with. That's lame and you'll feel awkward. You'll live without a baby shower.

Incorrect this is old school. OP my family is throwing me a coed shower. Really looking forward to it since I had been dreading an all girls shower when I don't have many close girlfriends to invite.

I love how people try to justify their tacky behavior by saying the rules don't apply anymore.

Sure it's a "rule" but who really cares? Most people aren't that wrapped up in standing on ceremony, so it's likely that anyone who would clutch their pearls over this wouldn't be a part of OP's shower. And that's no big loss.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:First off it isn't proper to have family members throw showers.

Just accept the fact you don't have friends to invite and focus on what you have going on in your life. Count your blessings. Don't make someone throw you a party and invite people you aren't close with. That's lame and you'll feel awkward. You'll live without a baby shower.

Why? I've never heard that before.

The reason is that having your family members throw you a shower is essentially asking for gifts for your family. A shower is supposed to be thrown by a friend. Not your sister or your mom.

This is NOT true for baby showers. This is the rule for wedding showers.

From Emily Post: (http://emilypost.com/advice/baby-showers-who-hosts/)

Traditionally, close friends, cousins, aunts, sisters-in-law, or co-workers of the mother-to-be hosted baby showers. Because gifts are central to showers, having a member of the honoree’s (or husband’s) immediate family host appeared self-serving. Today it is appropriate for anyone to host a baby shower, as long as there’s a legitimate reason. For example, some parents-to-be live far from their hometowns, and their mothers and siblings want to host a shower so that long-time friends can attend.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:First off it isn't proper to have family members throw showers.

Just accept the fact you don't have friends to invite and focus on what you have going on in your life. Count your blessings. Don't make someone throw you a party and invite people you aren't close with. That's lame and you'll feel awkward. You'll live without a baby shower.

Incorrect this is old school. OP my family is throwing me a coed shower. Really looking forward to it since I had been dreading an all girls shower when I don't have many close girlfriends to invite.

I love how people try to justify their tacky behavior by saying the rules don't apply anymore.

PP, did you hand write all your holiday cards and personalize notes in each? Do you write thank you notes to the hostess of every social event that you are invited to? Do you follow every rule of formal etiquette? Or only the ones you deem important?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe you should focus on making some friends.

We have tried....I hear it gets easier w kids. Play dates and groups and such. But we haven't had any luck.

I don't think it gets easier, but there are some exceptions. Where are you located?

It only gets easier if you are a SAHP. Otherwise it's very tough to connect with people through your kids because your interaction with the parents is very limited. And kids don't really start to play together until they are 2-3'ish.

Op, have a wonderful small shower with your family.

Congratulations on your baby.

Why do you want a baby shower? Do you feel like it's some life milestone? They are typically superficial, gift hoarding events. Most people only have a couple of good friends, everyone else is an acquaintance that is showing up for a party. If there was no shower a lot of these people would not show up to visit you and baby.

Why is your husband pushing for a shower? Who does he expect you to invite?

Skip the shower. Not everybody has one. Why did you fall out with your circle of friends?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:First off it isn't proper to have family members throw showers.

Just accept the fact you don't have friends to invite and focus on what you have going on in your life. Count your blessings. Don't make someone throw you a party and invite people you aren't close with. That's lame and you'll feel awkward. You'll live without a baby shower.

Incorrect this is old school. OP my family is throwing me a coed shower. Really looking forward to it since I had been dreading an all girls shower when I don't have many close girlfriends to invite.

I love how people try to justify their tacky behavior by saying the rules don't apply anymore.

You seem to be the only one who thinks thi applies. Let me guess, you're a proper southern lady?

Family throwing a shower is way different than yourself.

Why do you "need" a shower? I have 2 kids and never had a baby shower, except for a horrifyingly embarrassing event that my small office held because I was the first woman there to have a baby. Just skip the shower; no big deal.

It's true about the "no family" rule being outdated - there's a few old ladies on DCUM who determinedly insist otherwise, though.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:First off it isn't proper to have family members throw showers.

Just accept the fact you don't have friends to invite and focus on what you have going on in your life. Count your blessings. Don't make someone throw you a party and invite people you aren't close with. That's lame and you'll feel awkward. You'll live without a baby shower.

Incorrect this is old school. OP my family is throwing me a coed shower. Really looking forward to it since I had been dreading an all girls shower when I don't have many close girlfriends to invite.

I love how people try to justify their tacky behavior by saying the rules don't apply anymore.

Oh good grief. Not everyone has a bff that is busting at the seems to throw them a baby shower. But lots of people have neighbors, coworkers, relatives who would love to welcome a new baby and would enjoy attending a baby shower.

It isn't tacky when it is done from a good place. No one cares who throws it.

It is fine for your family to throw the shower. Invite relatives, neighbors, coworkers. A coed shower works too.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:First off it isn't proper to have family members throw showers.

Just accept the fact you don't have friends to invite and focus on what you have going on in your life. Count your blessings. Don't make someone throw you a party and invite people you aren't close with. That's lame and you'll feel awkward. You'll live without a baby shower.

Incorrect this is old school. OP my family is throwing me a coed shower. Really looking forward to it since I had been dreading an all girls shower when I don't have many close girlfriends to invite.

I love how people try to justify their tacky behavior by saying the rules don't apply anymore.

If you have no one to invite to a party, then don't have a shower. You don't throw your own either, someone throws it for you.