Hire a personal trainer and spend about 3 months getting into the best shape of your life. Your confidence will soar, your health will improve and guys will fall all over themselves trying to date you. Then, you just have to try to pick the best one for you!

I am / was a socially awkward guy. Very nerdy. Not bad looking, but not hot. And I was terrible at asking women out.

But, on line, I did not seem to have that problem.

^^And here's the honest truth. Most men LOVE to talk about themselves. Ask them questions about their past, their interests, their favorite vacation spots, etc. Listen to their answers, compliment them when it feels right, and ask follow up questions. When you meet the right guys, you won't have to feign interest in their answers -- you will be genuinely engaged and interested in them as people.

The one thing that you can do to lead to more dates is to make a guy feel heard and feel special. It sounds daunting, but it is not. Let your date do the talking and you won't have to make as much small talk. You don't have to worry about doing any special flirting at all. Keep your eyes on your date, look him in the eye and let him talk.

Just treat it like a sales funnel. Put together a marketing flyer (online dating), then realize that you need to make 1000 contacts to find 10 suitable candidates, or whatever the ratio is. It sounds like a joke, but I'm being serious. If you have a framework you're less likely to take things personally, because you have already set up the expectation that you will be rejected 90% of the time.

You don't need to wear makeup and try to be someone you are not.

I don't wear much makeup (just blush), and I wear jeans 99% of the time. Even so, there are plenty of guys that are perfectly fine with this. In fact, many like a low maintenance woman.

What i am trying to say is that there are some people out there who will LOVE you for just the person that you are. Ultimately, that is what you want.

Don't give up. Embrace the fear, and get out there and take a chance. Honestly, ask yourself what is the worst case? You go for coffee and there are no sparks. Don't take it personally. Odds are that you won't like everyone you go out with. It doesn't mean that they are a bad person, they are just not the right one for you. Same goes for you. If someone doesn't ask you out again, it doesn't mean that you are not good enough -- it just means that it wasn't a real match.

If you don't like small talk, you could try to plan dates around an activity. For example, meet someone at a pub with a Trivia night. You get to play a game, show your smarts, and won't have to make as much small talk. Go bowling, go ice skating at the sculpture garden. If there is an activity, you might find yourself more comfortable. And if your date is a bust, at least you got out of the house and had some fun.

There are dating sites for socially awkward people.

Anonymous wrote:Meetup.com worked for me. It's not a dating or singles group, so you can enjoy activities regardless of whether you meet men. I met a lot of wonderful friends (many of them are female, which helped me have single women to meet men with) in addition to meeting my husband.

Pp here--many of the people I met though meet ups are still close friends today.

Meetup.com worked for me. It's not a dating or singles group, so you can enjoy activities regardless of whether you meet men. I met a lot of wonderful friends (many of them are female, which helped me have single women to meet men with) in addition to meeting my husband.

Anonymous wrote:Men will always pick the easier female. I'll give you advice I was given. You have to lower your defenses to make yourself easier to get. Either that, or pick a guy who is also having a hard time finding someone. The problem with that is, you might be too similar and not that great of a match in the long run. You need to boost your confidence and learn how to flirt, or else accept offers from guys you are not that into. Supposedly guys will accept any girl, but they are dense and need signals like touching your hair alot and showing flesh. If you don't want to stoop to that kind of behavior, you have to find a guy with similar interests.

They pick the easiest because they are another charlie sheen

Anonymous wrote:Accept and embrace yourself for who you are. What makes you think you come across as creepy when you flirt? Maybe try to reframe your thinking so you're not seeing yourself in such a negative light. It's okay to be shy and feel awkward socially - you're in good company!

I agree with PP that it's best to find activities that you really enjoy and that reflect your true interests, so even if you don't meet a guy, you'll be engaged and fulfilled. And you'll have the opportunity to talk to people in a more natural way, in the context of an activity, and get to know them slowly.

Best of luck to you!

By creepy I mean flirting doesn't come naturally to me at all it's a series of awkward stares, awkward comments, , and strange body movements. Trust me it's creepy it's better if avoided by me.
I do go out and enoy things, but I don't really stand out in any way.
I guess I'm not good with interacting with people in general.

Get on Reddit? The r4r forum is a good place to start.
Are you into geeky culture? You sound like you'd fit in with the Reddit crowd.

Find a hobby and join a club. Look on idealist and find volunteer work supporting a cause that you love. Passion or enthusiasm for a common interest becomes flirtation.

This is tough, I know. I tried online with so-so results, but ultimately met my DH at work. I was instantly attracted to him. Once I knew he was interested, I had to let my guard down.

Men will always pick the easier female. I'll give you advice I was given. You have to lower your defenses to make yourself easier to get. Either that, or pick a guy who is also having a hard time finding someone. The problem with that is, you might be too similar and not that great of a match in the long run. You need to boost your confidence and learn how to flirt, or else accept offers from guys you are not that into. Supposedly guys will accept any girl, but they are dense and need signals like touching your hair alot and showing flesh. If you don't want to stoop to that kind of behavior, you have to find a guy with similar interests.

Accept and embrace yourself for who you are. What makes you think you come across as creepy when you flirt? Maybe try to reframe your thinking so you're not seeing yourself in such a negative light. It's okay to be shy and feel awkward socially - you're in good company!

I agree with PP that it's best to find activities that you really enjoy and that reflect your true interests, so even if you don't meet a guy, you'll be engaged and fulfilled. And you'll have the opportunity to talk to people in a more natural way, in the context of an activity, and get to know them slowly.

Best of luck to you!