Anonymous wrote:OK, all you "it's FINE!" posters...then what do *you* consider to be the "bare minimum hosting duties"?

Yes, I would make the bed and put out towels. However, as a working mom, I know that time gets away from you and that there are days where I can barely breathe to get everything done. I also know that when I am staying at someone else's house, they are already being kind and welcoming just inviting me to stay. If I have to make a bed or two, whatever.

I also do the dishes, get up and make coffee for everyone, take everyone out to a meal and be sure to be out of the house for the majority of a day. Like a good guest.

I have a BIL and SIL who figure family "guests" can make their own beds.

I almost always have the bed ready, towels out etc. Especially if they're showing up later in the day. Maybe things went awry in the OP's host's home that day.

OK, all you "it's FINE!" posters...then what do *you* consider to be the "bare minimum hosting duties"?

You really should stay in a hotel next time.

Maybe they don't want want you there, OP. Can't imagine why...

Anonymous wrote:Ridiculous that one or two things would prevent you from preparing a guest room for family who has traveled to see you. If you want them to stay with you, roll out a warm welcome, make space in the guest room closet, but some of the food they'll need. Make them feel welcome in your home, not a chore. We can always stay at a hotel and have done so many times, but I prefer a home. And one that has made me & my family the priority.

Well -LA-DI-DA!

Why do some folks act like they are the first people to ever have kids or sleepy kids?
My kids can flop on a sofa and nap til the bed is ready.
They can sleep on a pallet on the floor(often their preference -- it is an adventure)

Anonymous wrote:PSA to out of town guests: if you would like all the conveniences an amenities of a hotel, please feel free to get one.

If you would like to stay with family and enjoy the other perks that come with that, well, then learn to live with a few hiccups in the process. I didn't go to hospitality school and am also running my own life aside from doing my best to be a host, even if it is often inconvenient for me to do so.

THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I have been a guest and the beds were not ready and I've offered to make the bed, etc.
I'm just grateful to have a place to lay my head and to be accommodated at all, especially with family you learn to go with the flow.

lemme guess - your host has small children too?

Get a hotel next time, for everybody's sake. It's just easier.

Someone in my husband's family doesn't just forget to make the bed in time--they obviously aren't aware they're supposed to do it at all! Every time we stay with them, the sheets are clearly dirty and no towels are provided unless you ask. And the whole house is dirty and there's no food prepared...no I don't enjoy staying with them!

What time did you show up? Midnight?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sounds like a hotel may be a better option for your needs.

Amen! Free lodging doesn't come with turnndown.

It does in my house - of course, that's because I want my guests to feel welcomed and to know that I'm happy that they came to visit.

That is bonkers, OP. I don't know what excuse they could have had other than being inconsiderate.

I have two little kids and I make up guest beds well in advance so I know it's done and ready for them when they arrive (and most of our relatives don't even have kids!).

Ridiculous that one or two things would prevent you from preparing a guest room for family who has traveled to see you. If you want them to stay with you, roll out a warm welcome, make space in the guest room closet, but some of the food they'll need. Make them feel welcome in your home, not a chore. We can always stay at a hotel and have done so many times, but I prefer a home. And one that has made me & my family the priority.

Anonymous wrote:Wild thought ,maybe something happened before you arrived that delayed preparations.

Wild thought, if I were hosting and "something happened," I would make that clear: "I'm so embarrassed--I had the sheets in the washer, but then the doorbell rang with a furniture delivery that wasn't supposed to happen until tomorrow. I completely forgot to move the sheets to the dryer. I hope you can bear with me; I'll help you make up the bed once the dryer runs its cycle."