Anonymous
Post 09/30/2015 15:15     Subject: Re:Do you tell the wife that her wonderful husband cheated on her for two years?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:To those who say MYOB, if you were the aggrieved wife would you want to know the facts or just remain blissfully ignorant?

I would want to know the facts.


I'll bite and maybe this isn't popular but I don't think its anyone else's place, ever, to insert themselves into my marriage. I think barring serious abuse where getting someone out is paramount to survival/ health (NO you can't talk infidelity into that category) then it is really a shit thing to do to try to tell me what I should or shouldn't know. Either I find out or I don't but that really doesn't effect your life after you get your little "moment" in. So why does anyone feel the right to insert themselves?


I guess you opt for blissful ignorance.
Anonymous
Post 09/30/2015 15:14     Subject: Re:Do you tell the wife that her wonderful husband cheated on her for two years?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:To those who say MYOB, if you were the aggrieved wife would you want to know the facts or just remain blissfully ignorant?

I would want to know the facts.


I'll bite and maybe this isn't popular but I don't think its anyone else's place, ever, to insert themselves into my marriage. I think barring serious abuse where getting someone out is paramount to survival/ health (NO you can't talk infidelity into that category) then it is really a shit thing to do to try to tell me what I should or shouldn't know. Either I find out or I don't but that really doesn't effect your life after you get your little "moment" in. So why does anyone feel the right to insert themselves?


I totally feel similar. I can't even imagine how pissed I would be for some crusader to decide what I needed to know about my marriage. Especially if it was the OW telling me. Myob


What if you find out and then realize the people around you knew but never said a word about it to you?
Anonymous
Post 09/30/2015 15:07     Subject: Re:Do you tell the wife that her wonderful husband cheated on her for two years?
OP, what is your relationship with this couple?

You know, it's possible she already knows but would never breath a word of it to anyone.
Anonymous
Post 09/30/2015 15:05     Subject: Re:Do you tell the wife that her wonderful husband cheated on her for two years?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:To those who say MYOB, if you were the aggrieved wife would you want to know the facts or just remain blissfully ignorant?

I would want to know the facts.


I'll bite and maybe this isn't popular but I don't think its anyone else's place, ever, to insert themselves into my marriage. I think barring serious abuse where getting someone out is paramount to survival/ health (NO you can't talk infidelity into that category) then it is really a shit thing to do to try to tell me what I should or shouldn't know. Either I find out or I don't but that really doesn't effect your life after you get your little "moment" in. So why does anyone feel the right to insert themselves?


I totally feel similar. I can't even imagine how pissed I would be for some crusader to decide what I needed to know about my marriage. Especially if it was the OW telling me. Myob
Anonymous
Post 09/30/2015 15:03     Subject: Do you tell the wife that her wonderful husband cheated on her for two years?
Yes, tell her, because she needs to protect herself financially. Sounds as if he has and will continue to dissipate the marital assets (condo on the side, etc.)
Anonymous
Post 09/30/2015 15:02     Subject: Re:Do you tell the wife that her wonderful husband cheated on her for two years?
Anonymous wrote:To those who say MYOB, if you were the aggrieved wife would you want to know the facts or just remain blissfully ignorant?

I would want to know the facts.


I'll bite and maybe this isn't popular but I don't think its anyone else's place, ever, to insert themselves into my marriage. I think barring serious abuse where getting someone out is paramount to survival/ health (NO you can't talk infidelity into that category) then it is really a shit thing to do to try to tell me what I should or shouldn't know. Either I find out or I don't but that really doesn't effect your life after you get your little "moment" in. So why does anyone feel the right to insert themselves?
Anonymous
Post 09/30/2015 15:01     Subject: Do you tell the wife that her wonderful husband cheated on her for two years?
Are you the OW?
Anonymous
Post 09/30/2015 15:01     Subject: Do you tell the wife that her wonderful husband cheated on her for two years?
I would want to know. Tell her, even if you are the OW. If he does it once he will do it again.
Anonymous
Post 09/30/2015 15:00     Subject: Do you tell the wife that her wonderful husband cheated on her for two years?
It's also a health issue. Cheating husband could contract and pass on STDs.
Anonymous
Post 09/30/2015 14:59     Subject: Do you tell the wife that her wonderful husband cheated on her for two years?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Only if you're a jerk. She has a hard enough time already.


This.


Plus 1. Your motives are to punish his DW. You have hurt the family enough by being involved with a married man. Get out of their life and move on
Anonymous
Post 09/30/2015 14:54     Subject: Re:Do you tell the wife that her wonderful husband cheated on her for two years?
Regardless of the motivations of the person telling the wife surely she has the right to know.
Anonymous
Post 09/30/2015 14:54     Subject: Re:Do you tell the wife that her wonderful husband cheated on her for two years?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:To those who say MYOB, if you were the aggrieved wife would you want to know the facts or just remain blissfully ignorant?

I would want to know the facts.


I would want the facts to come from someone who is compassionate and has my interests in mind. The OP does not seem to be that kind of a friend.

Does anyone remember a similar post where the neighbor(1) wanted to tell her pregnant neighbor(2) about her husband's(2) affair that she(1) had witnessed? The OP of that thread had discussed the affair with the entire neighborhood and wanted to tell her pregnant neighbor after the fact. That OP was a malicious bitch and somehow this OP seems to be cut from the same cloth.

Yes, tell your friend the truth, but only if you are discreet, sensitive and want the best thing for her. Be prepared to support your friend is she leaves her husband - car, money, shelter, job, child care - for as long as she needs to get back on her feet. You can't do that? Then you have no business to insinuate yourself in her life.

This OP seems to be the one who had the affair, and the married man pretended to be single. She is angry and vindictive and her reason to tell is to punish and get revenge. That makes her as much as a lowlife as the cheating husband.


What makes the OP a malicious bitch and how can you tell from a thread she is a bad person? Perhaps the guilt if weighing heavy on her. The husband never pretended to be single, he said he was separated. You are assuming a lot about the OP.
Anonymous
Post 09/30/2015 14:52     Subject: Re:Do you tell the wife that her wonderful husband cheated on her for two years?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:To those who say MYOB, if you were the aggrieved wife would you want to know the facts or just remain blissfully ignorant?

I would want to know the facts.


I would want to remain ignorant - depending on who was informing me. Truthfully, I would likely already KNOW something was amiss. But if it was a friend or a relative who I know sincerely cares about me AND will be there to help me pick up the pieces - they can tell me. A "friend" who has no sincere care about the aftermath and just "thinks I should know" can MYOFB!


Remaining ignorant is dangerous though. It's unlikely that this will be the last mistress. At least the wife can know something is going on with her husband and seek out counseling to fix the marriage. Also, with remaining ignorant their is a real risk to being blind sided with being left for a side piece.
Anonymous
Post 09/30/2015 14:49     Subject: Do you tell the wife that her wonderful husband cheated on her for two years?
Yes please tell her. There are some women are actually totally clueless that their husband cheats. I'd just relay the information. How she wants to proceed is up to her.
Anonymous
Post 09/30/2015 14:45     Subject: Do you tell the wife that her wonderful husband cheated on her for two years?
If you are the other woman, do not tell the wife. She will never believe you. She'll just think you are a crazy stalker.

If you are the wife's sister, or life-long best friend, then yes, go ahead and tell.

If you are both the other woman and the wife's sister/best friend, you are a total loser bitch.