I was there also, I have always been an introvert and always will be. In high school I never wanted to except who I was, I actually didn't want or need a lot of friends and actually preferred eating alone. Obv as an adult I embrace who I am. I think the key is to instill confidence in him. You can be a loner and still be "cool", as long as you are confident and honest about who you are as a person.

Anonymous wrote:I was there OP. My HS just wasn't the right place for me. I ended up transferring junior year. Don't rule that out of it's an option for you.

i would do this if I could do it over again. my children were both outcasts. We should should have moved.

Anonymous wrote:Thanks all - for the poster who commented about "they" I was doing that to not discuss the sex of my child. We are encouraging joining a club. I think that would help.

If this is the first year of h.s., schedules changed every year. Who I sat with every year changed, but by h.s., I was able to navigate this.

First day of 7th grade though, I had no friends from 6th to sit with in a new middle school. I just sat at the end of a table. Eventually, I found some peeps. Your kid will to.

If they're in a conversation with someone from their last class going to lunch, it can make an easy transition on finding someone to sit with.

All good ideas. I'm a teacher and a low key small club with nice kids may help. My school has many of the ones suggested by PP. There is also the chess club. The literary magazine and stage crew/theater would be very good. He could take photos or write.

OP. Another group with nice kids is fencing. Your child can also think about spending lunch in a classroom or the library helping out. There are some clubs that meet at lunch and also ways to assist at school. I can't say the latter is as much fun as friends, but it is way better than being lonely in the cafeteria.

Watching your kid feel sad is heart breaking.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"Him" or "they?"

Are we talking about one person or several?

Hey grammar nazi, OP is not wanting to reveal the gender of his/her child. Stop being a noodge.

b/c there's obviously only one boy in high school in the surrounding areas

Maybe OP feels bad about it. She's looking for help for a lonely kid. Have a little compassion and give her a break!

Thanks for that. This is OP and that is exactly how I feel. It is very hard when you see your child hurting like this. I appreciate the compassion.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"Him" or "they?"

Are we talking about one person or several?

Hey grammar nazi, OP is not wanting to reveal the gender of his/her child. Stop being a noodge.

b/c there's obviously only one boy in high school in the surrounding areas

Maybe OP feels bad about it. She's looking for help for a lonely kid. Have a little compassion and give her a break!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"Him" or "they?"

Are we talking about one person or several?

Hey grammar nazi, OP is not wanting to reveal the gender of his/her child. Stop being a noodge.

b/c there's obviously only one boy in high school in the surrounding areas

Hugs to you and your dc op. I hope things get better for your dc. I agree with pp, encourage dc to join activities during school and after.

I have a dc with learning disabilities and he often has problems finding friends in class and at lunch. It can be heart breaking. He gets so upset sometimes when he doesn't get chosen as a partner in groups that he shuts down emotionally and barely gets what is being taught.

Also consider groups outside of the HS such as a church youth group or if one has an interest in a sport perhaps a community based program as in soccer, basketball, swimming etc. If there is a college based group with area high schools called Young Life, it might be worth trying. Also service clubs like Key Club can give one opportunity for volunteering and leadership growth. If he is feeling bad about himself, suggest he might volunteer for even one sports training with the local Special Olympics program. The seasonal sports always need volunteer buddies and only last 8-10 sessions once a week so not a huge commitment of time.

Anonymous wrote:Theater kids tend to be among the most welcoming group in high school. Can they try out for or volunteer to help with the play?

+1

Also, theatre groups need lots of people, so DC will absolutely be busy.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"Him" or "they?"

Are we talking about one person or several?

Hey grammar nazi, OP is not wanting to reveal the gender of his/her child. Stop being a noodge.

Seriously, why do people continue to comment on this. It's obvious why posters use the word.

Contact your child's counselor at school, he/she may be able to help.

DS eats alone every day, he is a loner who say that people "bother him".

Thanks all - for the poster who commented about "they" I was doing that to not discuss the sex of my child. We are encouraging joining a club. I think that would help.

I think it would help to get involved in a gym or some other sort of activity (music lessons, running, whatever) that gives your DC a chance to interact with kids away from the school. Even a part time job or volunteer work would be good. And like others said - HS graduation is not that far away. College is a new life for some kids.