Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I will tell you a story of a B-C student in the 90's in NOVA. She took plenty of AP classes and worked her tail off, but the material just didn't connect on a classroom level. She would regularly get 3's on AP exams and felt like the most unremarkable girl in the world (did I mentioned she was a gangle mess with frizzy hair).

She ended up at a state U in the southeast. And she found her own voice and love of learning because it was already there. She did incredibly well, graduated summa and did peace corps. She ended up in a PhD program at an IVY (she shit her pants when she was accepted. It was literally one of the best moments of her life) in International Relations, which she loved. She now is a grown up with slighly less frizzy hair and is less of a mess, but is a happy well adjusted tenured professor. She's a happy woman, she knits, and runs, and juggles small kids and a full life. She's happy. Because she went after what was interesting and right for her and kept trying. She kept pushing and she didn't give up even though she wasn't the best. She was good enough for her and she got better. Because that's all that matters.

Tell your DD to keep trying. Keep looking to grow and learn and see what's in the world. It's so much bigger than high school. OP, it's so much bigger than even you. But she has to keep that love of learning there and a willingness to not be the best because that is where true, real growth is.

GL

Great story! Thanks for sharing.

One of best all time posts on DCUM. Thank you!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I will tell you a story of a B-C student in the 90's in NOVA. She took plenty of AP classes and worked her tail off, but the material just didn't connect on a classroom level. She would regularly get 3's on AP exams and felt like the most unremarkable girl in the world (did I mentioned she was a gangle mess with frizzy hair).

She ended up at a state U in the southeast. And she found her own voice and love of learning because it was already there. She did incredibly well, graduated summa and did peace corps. She ended up in a PhD program at an IVY (she shit her pants when she was accepted. It was literally one of the best moments of her life) in International Relations, which she loved. She now is a grown up with slighly less frizzy hair and is less of a mess, but is a happy well adjusted tenured professor. She's a happy woman, she knits, and runs, and juggles small kids and a full life. She's happy. Because she went after what was interesting and right for her and kept trying. She kept pushing and she didn't give up even though she wasn't the best. She was good enough for her and she got better. Because that's all that matters.

Tell your DD to keep trying. Keep looking to grow and learn and see what's in the world. It's so much bigger than high school. OP, it's so much bigger than even you. But she has to keep that love of learning there and a willingness to not be the best because that is where true, real growth is.

GL

Great story! Thanks for sharing.

Anonymous wrote:I don't have much helpful advice, op. But this makes me so sad to read - and I could see something similar in the future of one of my kids. Your daughter sounds awesome. Since when did someone who maintains a B average, is a hard worker and curious student become sub-par - crazy! Why do we make kids feel this way? (I don't mean you in particular op, I mean the royal "we" of our generation.) No way was every successful, well educated adult I know a solid A student with perfect SATs back in their youth. I do think as a parent I would focus on building her self-esteem because she should be proud of what she's accomplishing and excited about her future!