DD got an IUD along with her abortion. I think perhaps planning ahead would have been better.

Anonymous wrote:I'd get her a LARC (long-acting reversible contraceptive) rather than the pill. Pill is too prone to mistakes/forgetfulness. I'd personally recommend Nexplanon for a teenage girl you're concerned about getting pregnant.

I agree with the Nexplanon for teenage girls. I have it and love it. No worries for three years.

I tried the iud but couldn't make it through the insertion it hurt so bad. No way would I want my teenage daughter to go through that.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wanted to go on the pill, parents said no, used condom instead, pregnant at 22.

Why didn't you add in the pill later? At 22 it seems like a person could make their own decisions. Did you have exigent circumstances?

Not pp. The issue is that young adults (18-26) don't want to go to a real doctor for birth control because they're still on their parents insurance plans and it shows up as mail to their parents house. I know this happened to me when I was in college. Even though we had insurance, I had to go to planned parenthood for birth control. Parents would not have been okay with it from my OBGYN.

I'd get her a LARC (long-acting reversible contraceptive) rather than the pill. Pill is too prone to mistakes/forgetfulness. I'd personally recommend Nexplanon for a teenage girl you're concerned about getting pregnant.

I went on birth control in highschool. It took me a long time after starting to have sex to work up the courage to talk to my mother about going on it. Even then I used the excuse of wanting it for my periods and cramping, etc.

I would suggest talking to your daughter about the options, making an appointment with a gynecologist for her to have an initial screening and discussion about birth control, and providing her with some materials. Maybe even a pack of condoms to go with the materials. Make it very informational and leave the choice up to her, but encourage her to make the choice knowing all the information and knowing that you are supportive of the choice, and your preference for which method and why.

Does providing all this maybe make it a bit easier for your daughter to have sex? Perhaps. But, I know personally, I only slightly hesitated due to my parents preferences. Ultimately, hormones made the choice. And I would much prefer to know my daughter has all the information and protection possible before those hormones start making the decision.

Anonymous wrote:

I'm the parent who did pill and then IUD. YES. I regularly and religiously told her that one method always fails and that people who only use one method of birth control are called parents. I always emphasized two methods were required, one always must be a condom.

I also always said the only thing that is 100% is abstinence.

BTW- I know a bunch of kids that ended up pregnant and at planned parenthood who were on nothing. I would imagine this is the "not my kid" crowd. OP - you are smart - mitigate that risk!!!!

But that's factually incorrect. One method does NOT always fail. And there are plenty of people who only use one method of birth control without becoming parents.

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, I would not give her an IUD. No matter how many times you say that it does not mean she should have sex, your giving her a way to have sex without consequences. Your words and actions send seperate messages

An IUD is not a way to have sex without consequences. An IUD is a way to have sex without pregnancy. (I, personally, think that's a very good thing for a person who has sex and doesn't want to get pregnant.)

What about health risks related to using the pills?

I'm happy to talk to my DD (and DS) about pregnancy prevention and STD prevention, and provide condoms, but I am a little leery about the side effects of the pill.

Is anyone else concerned about that?

My teen did Nuva Ring and condoms. She is now on the pill and condoms as a college student.

Maybe I am missing something -- how is group dating bad? PP said set limits like curfew, one-on-one dating etc. I always thought group dates would be better bc there are more people, less of a chance for date rape/violence.

For the comment that the 14 yo "good girl", that was me. I was 14, never even held hands. Then, while on vacation, I met a boy and fell for him immediately. We found a place to be alone, and we had sex. I was lucky in that I did not get pregnant. My mom did not have "the talk" with me for several years.

I do not regret it, but know I was lucky.

Anonymous wrote:I wanted to go on the pill, parents said no, used condom instead, pregnant at 22.

Why didn't you add in the pill later? At 22 it seems like a person could make their own decisions. Did you have exigent circumstances?

Having "a prepared" teenager for sex does not take lesson the need for appropriate parental supervision in keeping track of who their friends are, what they are doing and setting reasonable limits on going out, one-on-one dating, curfew etc. Girls need to realize that any relationship takes two to make it happen whether long-term or a one night stand. I hope parents of boys see this thread because, then you can maybe understand how easily it is for a boy to end up in the wrong situation in a college setting and being accused of whatever by a young "prepared for sex" college gal. Parents of boys need to teach how to protect themselves against girls who are looking for it just as girls do of guys.....
And the entire aspect of sex with drinking and drugs has not even come into the picture whether in high school or college. Where we are we see the results of the one wrong decision every day in the papers.

Anonymous wrote:Does anyone push condoms to prevent STDs? Preventing pregnancy is really important but some STDs are not curable and it would suck to have to deal with that at 15.

I'm the parent who did pill and then IUD. YES. I regularly and religiously told her that one method always fails and that people who only use one method of birth control are called parents. I always emphasized two methods were required, one always must be a condom.

I also always said the only thing that is 100% is abstinence.

BTW- I know a bunch of kids that ended up pregnant and at planned parenthood who were on nothing. I would imagine this is the "not my kid" crowd. OP - you are smart - mitigate that risk!!!!

Anonymous wrote:Does anyone push condoms to prevent STDs? Preventing pregnancy is really important but some STDs are not curable and it would suck to have to deal with that at 15.

I push condoms (always! no matter the age until you're in a committed relationship and both partners have been tested) plus a reliable form of birth control.