OP, my general sense after reading this board for years is that for "DC middle class" families, almost always the best approach is to (1) get the best IEP goals and services you can (might need to hire an advocate if your school is difficult) and (2) supplement with private tutoring and therapy.

Your other option is to try and get placement in a private school paid for by the school system but this is really difficult and you might not like the school choices. It sounds like the school you are interested in does not take public placements anyway.

Good luck.

Ok, op here is a thought. Just ask the schools. You are now giving details that really don't matter to us- and @ end of the day what the hell do we know about your ability to get financial aide?
The consensus is that you won't, so go prove us wrong!
Goof luck!

Besides it doesn't make any sense to dispute a 401k or pay more for rent so not sure what the point is anyhow.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Another single mom with an SN kid. I don't get offended easily, but you, Ms. $210k OP, have managed to do it. What nerve.

We have two kids at SN schools and a 210k income and we get some financial aid at one that offers it, but only enough to make it comparable to what we would be paying if we didn't need a SN school. Between the two kids, with financial aid, it is over 50k not including other medical expenses and summer care that is needed. It's not easy. No clue how everyone pulls it off. After that, bills and mortgage, we we lucky to save anything at all.

I'm a different single mom of a SN kid. I understand that it's not easy, but you've also listed 2 things (savings, and mortgage) that are out of reach for me right now without paying for private school tuition. The fact that you can still afford these things AFTER tuition, tells me that you're in a far better position than I am.

I'm the pp you quoted and actually a mortgage is cheaper for us than rent thanks to a VA loan (with no deposit needed and lower rates than conventional). Otherwise we wouldn't be able to own. Again, everyone is unique and really HHI tells very little alone! Our "savings" is nothing to speak of.

I'm the OP. We don't have a mortgage and 401k after tuition because we're not paying SN school tuition right now. If it were a choice between SN school tuition and having security in retirement I would still chose security in retirement though. I have too many relatives living on SS to want to go down that road. Or to put that on my kids.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Another single mom with an SN kid. I don't get offended easily, but you, Ms. $210k OP, have managed to do it. What nerve.

We have two kids at SN schools and a 210k income and we get some financial aid at one that offers it, but only enough to make it comparable to what we would be paying if we didn't need a SN school. Between the two kids, with financial aid, it is over 50k not including other medical expenses and summer care that is needed. It's not easy. No clue how everyone pulls it off. After that, bills and mortgage, we we lucky to save anything at all.

I'm a different single mom of a SN kid. I understand that it's not easy, but you've also listed 2 things (savings, and mortgage) that are out of reach for me right now without paying for private school tuition. The fact that you can still afford these things AFTER tuition, tells me that you're in a far better position than I am.

I'm the pp you quoted and actually a mortgage is cheaper for us than rent thanks to a VA loan (with no deposit needed and lower rates than conventional). Otherwise we wouldn't be able to own. Again, everyone is unique and really HHI tells very little alone! Our "savings" is nothing to speak of.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Another single mom with an SN kid. I don't get offended easily, but you, Ms. $210k OP, have managed to do it. What nerve.

We have two kids at SN schools and a 210k income and we get some financial aid at one that offers it, but only enough to make it comparable to what we would be paying if we didn't need a SN school. Between the two kids, with financial aid, it is over 50k not including other medical expenses and summer care that is needed. It's not easy. No clue how everyone pulls it off. After that, bills and mortgage, we we lucky to save anything at all.

I'm a different single mom of a SN kid. I understand that it's not easy, but you've also listed 2 things (savings, and mortgage) that are out of reach for me right now without paying for private school tuition. The fact that you can still afford these things AFTER tuition, tells me that you're in a far better position than I am.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hi OP,
We have 3 kids and an income of 140k and were told "no chance" of FA at a SN school that is very expensive. They suggested borrowing money from grandparents, taking out a HELOC and tapping retirement accounts. We just couldn't afford to beggar ourselves for a chance at the school making a difference (no guarantees-or-your-money-back right?). The private SN schools that don't take public placements are really for very wealthy families, unfortunately.

Just curious though, is that 140k per year with both parents working? That makes a difference too.

No, just one parent working. My SN dc has been in and out of school and the hospital for long stretches.

Anonymous wrote:Hi OP,
We have 3 kids and an income of 140k and were told "no chance" of FA at a SN school that is very expensive. They suggested borrowing money from grandparents, taking out a HELOC and tapping retirement accounts. We just couldn't afford to beggar ourselves for a chance at the school making a difference (no guarantees-or-your-money-back right?). The private SN schools that don't take public placements are really for very wealthy families, unfortunately.

Just curious though, is that 140k per year with both parents working? That makes a difference too.

Hi OP,
We have 3 kids and an income of 140k and were told "no chance" of FA at a SN school that is very expensive. They suggested borrowing money from grandparents, taking out a HELOC and tapping retirement accounts. We just couldn't afford to beggar ourselves for a chance at the school making a difference (no guarantees-or-your-money-back right?). The private SN schools that don't take public placements are really for very wealthy families, unfortunately.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Another single mom with an SN kid. I don't get offended easily, but you, Ms. $210k OP, have managed to do it. What nerve.

We have two kids at SN schools and a 210k income and we get some financial aid at one that offers it, but only enough to make it comparable to what we would be paying if we didn't need a SN school. Between the two kids, with financial aid, it is over 50k not including other medical expenses and summer care that is needed. It's not easy. No clue how everyone pulls it off. After that, bills and mortgage, we we lucky to save anything at all.

Cry me a river.

Nice... Sorry my story bothers you.

I think that PP's point is that you're STILL better off than the single mom making $85k and trying to pay for SN school.

And again, didn't think this was an "I'm better or worse" than you post, but examples of families that got some financial aid at that income level, which is what OP wanted to know. I never claimed to be in a terrible position, but whether you like it or not, in the lovely bubble of the DC area, the reality is that an income of 200k if you have significant medical expenses is not going to get you super far.

If there is truly significant medical debt they might take that into consideration, otherwise they'll probably recommend a HELOC or tapping into retirement

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Another single mom with an SN kid. I don't get offended easily, but you, Ms. $210k OP, have managed to do it. What nerve.

We have two kids at SN schools and a 210k income and we get some financial aid at one that offers it, but only enough to make it comparable to what we would be paying if we didn't need a SN school. Between the two kids, with financial aid, it is over 50k not including other medical expenses and summer care that is needed. It's not easy. No clue how everyone pulls it off. After that, bills and mortgage, we we lucky to save anything at all.

Cry me a river.

Nice... Sorry my story bothers you.

I think that PP's point is that you're STILL better off than the single mom making $85k and trying to pay for SN school.

And again, didn't think this was an "I'm better or worse" than you post, but examples of families that got some financial aid at that income level, which is what OP wanted to know. I never claimed to be in a terrible position, but whether you like it or not, in the lovely bubble of the DC area, the reality is that an income of 200k if you have significant medical expenses is not going to get you super far.

Anonymous wrote:Another single mom with an SN kid. I don't get offended easily, but you, Ms. $210k OP, have managed to do it. What nerve.

Oh please. You know what, three sentences about my family and situation? And you want to claim not easily offended? Income is only good for something if you have savings and havent, say, spent every dime on a catastrophic illness and aren't struggling to come up with the up front money at the last minute. That's why I said maybe next year. But that may be too much for you, ms. Know it all.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Another single mom with an SN kid. I don't get offended easily, but you, Ms. $210k OP, have managed to do it. What nerve.

We have two kids at SN schools and a 210k income and we get some financial aid at one that offers it, but only enough to make it comparable to what we would be paying if we didn't need a SN school. Between the two kids, with financial aid, it is over 50k not including other medical expenses and summer care that is needed. It's not easy. No clue how everyone pulls it off. After that, bills and mortgage, we we lucky to save anything at all.

Cry me a river.

Nice... Sorry my story bothers you.

I think that PP's point is that you're STILL better off than the single mom making $85k and trying to pay for SN school.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Another single mom with an SN kid. I don't get offended easily, but you, Ms. $210k OP, have managed to do it. What nerve.

We have two kids at SN schools and a 210k income and we get some financial aid at one that offers it, but only enough to make it comparable to what we would be paying if we didn't need a SN school. Between the two kids, with financial aid, it is over 50k not including other medical expenses and summer care that is needed. It's not easy. No clue how everyone pulls it off. After that, bills and mortgage, we we lucky to save anything at all.

Cry me a river.

Nice... Sorry my story bothers you.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Another single mom with an SN kid. I don't get offended easily, but you, Ms. $210k OP, have managed to do it. What nerve.

We have two kids at SN schools and a 210k income and we get some financial aid at one that offers it, but only enough to make it comparable to what we would be paying if we didn't need a SN school. Between the two kids, with financial aid, it is over 50k not including other medical expenses and summer care that is needed. It's not easy. No clue how everyone pulls it off. After that, bills and mortgage, we we lucky to save anything at all.

Cry me a river.