Anonymous
08/02/2015 23:58
Subject: Re:moved overseas to avoid in-laws and yet here they are
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Suck it up, OP. You're going to be a dreaded MIL one day too.
+1
Especially if you have sons. Their future wives will try to keep you from seeing your son and grand children too! Karma!
My MIL is wonderful. But that's because she respects my husband as an adult and stays active and involved in hobbies of her own. It's when they try to turn their children and grandchildren into hobbies and have control issues that they turn into nightmares. In my family, it's my bored retired mother who is the difficult MIL because she believes her grandchildren are here solely for her own emotional well being. I moved across the country and with the internet and iPhones as well as unlimited retirement funds, there is no escape. Talk about bwahahaha!
could've written this myself. jeez.
Anonymous
08/02/2015 13:55
Subject: moved overseas to avoid in-laws and yet here they are
I know you weren't looking for advice OP, but isn't there any way to make the situation work better in your favor? Like not have so much summer availability (gee, sorry - we're booked but can see you for dinner ONE day next week), or asking her to stay in a hotel/rental home when she's visiting overseas (or ask her to pare it down to a week despite the long travel time to get there) or encourage a week or so of visiting you.
At the very least maybe you could enlist more help? Let DH take on more of the together time, send her out on day trips while you "work/get things done around the house"
And to those who primly remind us that we'll be MILs someday too - yeah, yeah, I get it. But I don't think it's fair or accurate to lump all MILs together. Mine is generally fantastic to spend time with, and a lot of that has to do with understanding when she'll feel her best and also knowing that whatever she might privately think or feel about me, we are each reliably courteous guests when in each other's homes. Not everyone is able to expect that kind of security and I can't blame them for wanting to limit face time.
At the very least maybe you could enlist more help? Let DH take on more of the together time, send her out on day trips while you "work/get things done around the house"
And to those who primly remind us that we'll be MILs someday too - yeah, yeah, I get it. But I don't think it's fair or accurate to lump all MILs together. Mine is generally fantastic to spend time with, and a lot of that has to do with understanding when she'll feel her best and also knowing that whatever she might privately think or feel about me, we are each reliably courteous guests when in each other's homes. Not everyone is able to expect that kind of security and I can't blame them for wanting to limit face time.
Anonymous
07/31/2015 12:23
Subject: Re:moved overseas to avoid in-laws and yet here they are
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Suck it up, OP. You're going to be a dreaded MIL one day too.
+1
Especially if you have sons. Their future wives will try to keep you from seeing your son and grand children too! Karma!
My MIL is wonderful. But that's because she respects my husband as an adult and stays active and involved in hobbies of her own. It's when they try to turn their children and grandchildren into hobbies and have control issues that they turn into nightmares. In my family, it's my bored retired mother who is the difficult MIL because she believes her grandchildren are here solely for her own emotional well being. I moved across the country and with the internet and iPhones as well as unlimited retirement funds, there is no escape. Talk about bwahahaha!