Anonymous
Post 07/17/2015 14:11     Subject: Does your DH with a hairy back take his shirt off for swimming?
Yes, but he'll wear a rash guard some times only because his wife nags him about too much sun exposure.

Anonymous
Post 07/17/2015 14:10     Subject: Does your DH with a hairy back take his shirt off for swimming?
My husband is very self conscious about his body hair. He still goes in the pool, but I know it bothers him. Before we go to the beach or another vacation with swimming, I trim his back hair (a true show of love and affection ) and that helps him a lot with the mental aspect. Realistically I don't think anyone cares.
Anonymous
Post 07/17/2015 14:10     Subject: Does your DH with a hairy back take his shirt off for swimming?
Anonymous wrote:So I know people are pretty insensitive on the hairy back issue, so I expect some haters, but my take is that it's body snarking to the highest degree, and everybody should feel comfortable at the pool. Anyway, he won't swim, even after he shaves. This is becoming a pretty big bummer since my kids love the pool. Even worse, he had laser treatment several years ago, and it's thinner but still there. Do you think there's anything that can be done? How can I convince him to say eff it to the haters and just get comfortable with his body?!? (He has not been receptive to the idea of a rash guard or t-shirt? I kind of agree they look a little silly on grown men, but obvs would support him if it would just get him into the pool!)


Shaving, waxing, laser treatment? For BACK HAIR? Did they throw in a free neutering with that?

Men have hair. And penises. Sometimes we even defecate or (horrors) pass gas.

Folks I know die laughing when they see a waxed metrosexual strutting his stuff. It's so Euro-effete.

Tell your husband to embrace himself and his masculinity. It's something to be celebrated.
Anonymous
Post 07/17/2015 14:03     Subject: Does your DH with a hairy back take his shirt off for swimming?
I don't think anyone cares about being hairy, especially if its just stubly and he doesn't look like a woolly mammoth.

I have very hairy legs and sometimes shave/trim them (I just don't like being hairy) even though I many girls think its weird. I don't care what they think. If someone is going to be judgemental about what another does with their body, or how they look, then screw 'em.
Anonymous
Post 07/17/2015 13:54     Subject: Does your DH with a hairy back take his shirt off for swimming?
If he's reasonably fit, nobody is going to care. People are judgy about fat; not so much about hair (on men).

FWIW, I love a hairy man. The first time I saw my husband with his shirt off, which was at the beach, I was so disappointed to realized that he had NO HAIR ON HIS CHEST OR BACK - none whatsoever - and it was not because he was shaving or waxing. It just doesn't grow. Not sexy.
Anonymous
Post 07/17/2015 13:05     Subject: Does your DH with a hairy back take his shirt off for swimming?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:DH is plenty hairy (front , back and middle). He doesn't shave, nor does he wear a rash guard. He is in the pool with the kids every day. It never occurred to him (or me) that he should stay out of the water (or to shave his chest hair). I don't love all the hair, but I will take him with the hair over anyone else without, because I love him. To hell with what other people think. Also, I find insecure men a lot less sexy than hairy ones.

Yes OP here and I kind of agree with your last statement, and think DH might too. That's why he just forgoes swimming- doesn't want to appear insecure but can't handle au natural. BUMMER!


he doesn't want to appear insecure so he forgoes having fun in the pool with his kids because he's too insecure? i hate to think how insecure he'd be if he were a woman with all the body issues that are projected onto us. no one really gives a sh*t about the hair on your husband's back. i promise.
Anonymous
Post 07/17/2015 13:02     Subject: Does your DH with a hairy back take his shirt off for swimming?
Anonymous wrote:I love a hairy guy. I know that I am probably in the minority, but I find it sexy and manly. Guys with little to no body hair kind of creep me out.

Anyway, I have cellulite on my legs and I still go to the pool. I like to consider it a community service. Other women can look at me and feel better about themselves, if they so choose. Sure I'd love to have a perfect body, but that isn't going to happen. Life is about embracing what we are given and rolling with it.

I hope he can find a way (maybe therapy) to get over this and not let life and fun experiences pass him by because of low self esteem.


Agree - don't get this no hair on men thing
Anonymous
Post 07/17/2015 12:59     Subject: Re:Does your DH with a hairy back take his shirt off for swimming?
Sorry your husband is so uncomfortable with this. My DH has a hairy back. He doesn't love it, but he doesn't hide it either. And I don't love it, but I have plenty of aesthetic flaws of my own, which DH kindly overlooks. Everyone else at the pool can just deal -- which, judging by the look of them, is exactly what they're doing.

Would it help if you and DH spent a little time together at the pool quietly observing everyone else's imperfections? Perhaps it would help him realize that no one is paying any attention to his back stubble.
Anonymous
Post 07/17/2015 12:31     Subject: Does your DH with a hairy back take his shirt off for swimming?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:DH is plenty hairy (front , back and middle). He doesn't shave, nor does he wear a rash guard. He is in the pool with the kids every day. It never occurred to him (or me) that he should stay out of the water (or to shave his chest hair). I don't love all the hair, but I will take him with the hair over anyone else without, because I love him. To hell with what other people think. Also, I find insecure men a lot less sexy than hairy ones.

Yes OP here and I kind of agree with your last statement, and think DH might too. That's why he just forgoes swimming- doesn't want to appear insecure but can't handle au natural. BUMMER!


Do your kids wear sun shirts? Maybe he can start wearing one as a role model for his children.

Yes they do! And even I bought one! Long story, but I actually really like swimming in it, cause my top doesn't come down. I'll start pushing this angle.
Anonymous
Post 07/17/2015 12:29     Subject: Does your DH with a hairy back take his shirt off for swimming?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:DH is plenty hairy (front , back and middle). He doesn't shave, nor does he wear a rash guard. He is in the pool with the kids every day. It never occurred to him (or me) that he should stay out of the water (or to shave his chest hair). I don't love all the hair, but I will take him with the hair over anyone else without, because I love him. To hell with what other people think. Also, I find insecure men a lot less sexy than hairy ones.

Yes OP here and I kind of agree with your last statement, and think DH might too. That's why he just forgoes swimming- doesn't want to appear insecure but can't handle au natural. BUMMER!


Do your kids wear sun shirts? Maybe he can start wearing one as a role model for his children.
Anonymous
Post 07/17/2015 12:11     Subject: Does your DH with a hairy back take his shirt off for swimming?
Anonymous wrote:I love a hairy guy. I know that I am probably in the minority, but I find it sexy and manly. Guys with little to no body hair kind of creep me out.

Anyway, I have cellulite on my legs and I still go to the pool. I like to consider it a community service. Other women can look at me and feel better about themselves, if they so choose. Sure I'd love to have a perfect body, but that isn't going to happen. Life is about embracing what we are given and rolling with it.

I hope he can find a way (maybe therapy) to get over this and not let life and fun experiences pass him by because of low self esteem.


Good on you, PP. I love your healthy self-esteem. Go for it!!
Anonymous
Post 07/17/2015 12:09     Subject: Does your DH with a hairy back take his shirt off for swimming?
Anonymous wrote:DH is plenty hairy (front , back and middle). He doesn't shave, nor does he wear a rash guard. He is in the pool with the kids every day. It never occurred to him (or me) that he should stay out of the water (or to shave his chest hair). I don't love all the hair, but I will take him with the hair over anyone else without, because I love him. To hell with what other people think. Also, I find insecure men a lot less sexy than hairy ones.

Yes OP here and I kind of agree with your last statement, and think DH might too. That's why he just forgoes swimming- doesn't want to appear insecure but can't handle au natural. BUMMER!
Anonymous
Post 07/17/2015 12:02     Subject: Does your DH with a hairy back take his shirt off for swimming?
DH is plenty hairy (front , back and middle). He doesn't shave, nor does he wear a rash guard. He is in the pool with the kids every day. It never occurred to him (or me) that he should stay out of the water (or to shave his chest hair). I don't love all the hair, but I will take him with the hair over anyone else without, because I love him. To hell with what other people think. Also, I find insecure men a lot less sexy than hairy ones.
Anonymous
Post 07/17/2015 12:01     Subject: Does your DH with a hairy back take his shirt off for swimming?
As a melanoma survivor, I really hate it when I hear people say that long-sleeve rash guards look silly. On anyone.

Try this site. The lady who owns it lost her husband and father of her children to skin cancer.

http://www.uvskinz.com
Anonymous
Post 07/17/2015 11:57     Subject: Does your DH with a hairy back take his shirt off for swimming?
Anonymous wrote:I love a hairy guy. I know that I am probably in the minority, but I find it sexy and manly. Guys with little to no body hair kind of creep me out.

Anyway, I have cellulite on my legs and I still go to the pool. I like to consider it a community service. Other women can look at me and feel better about themselves, if they so choose. Sure I'd love to have a perfect body, but that isn't going to happen. Life is about embracing what we are given and rolling with it.

I hope he can find a way (maybe therapy) to get over this and not let life and fun experiences pass him by because of low self esteem.

Thanks PP, I guess you're my role model. Cellulite is one of those things, like a hairy back, that people snark on. How did you make peace with your self and get so confident? I am OP and I am innately, or was raised to be very confident. DH, on the other hand has a passive aggressive, appearances conscious mom who shamed him quite a bit. He was also, like 11 when it grew in, and a foot taller than the other kids, and just does not seem to have been able to make peace with it!