Anonymous wrote:Men are going through a mid life crisis around the time of their second marriage - they marry a hot girl as a trophy - the girl marries the balding older guy for his money - and 5 years later is anyone really surprised that the divorce rate is higher for second marriages than first marriages?

After 5 years, the divorce rate for second marriages is lower than firsts.
-hot 2nd wife of 8 yrs

Second wife here. 7 years younger. I'm thin, fit and have a great career . . . love the age difference.

Female answer to this question: because he can control her / she doesn't call him on his crap
Male answer: her tight ass + thigh gap

Existential crisis.

Because they can!

Because each person is offering different items of value - older man = maturity, stability, likely financially good. Younger woman is offering fertility, attractiveness. It's a transaction, quid pro quo.

Men are going through a mid life crisis around the time of their second marriage - they marry a hot girl as a trophy - the girl marries the balding older guy for his money - and 5 years later is anyone really surprised that the divorce rate is higher for second marriages than first marriages?

Anonymous wrote:I think because youth and beauty go together? Maybe because men are still able to father kids and do not have a ticking biological clock? Maybe because they get more sex from younger women? Maybe because men are scared of dying? Maybe because it is a feather in their cap?

Do they then call it macaroni?

Men might say it is because they want kids that they married younger. However, sex to some people is always transactional. Men marry younger and give her kids. Then the sex stops just like the first wife. Divorce. More child support and he is on the hunt again, except older, pudgier, and with less money!

Anonymous wrote:Youthful sex because of the raging hormones.

+1 it comes down to sex.

I've been married for a long time, but back when I was dating (teens and early 20s), it seemed like the girls were always chasing older guys. So, both genders have their age gap preferences.

1. Youth and fertility.

2. BECAUSE THEY CAN!

DH here: it's really not that hard or complicated. In general, sex is a big deal to men, so looks are a big deal to men. If a man is in the unfortunate position of having to start over in a new relationship because his marriage has failed, why wouldn't he try to find someone as attractive as possible, all else being equal? It would be kind of silly to do anything else. Generally speaking, this drives men to look towards younger women, who on average are more attractive, although of course there are attractive women of all ages.


Obviously, there is a lot of variation in circumstances and there are many different trade-offs in selecting one's partner. Looks or sex are not the only things that matter, but those powerful considerations tend to drive a man's search for a new partner to skew younger. (I, myself, married a slightly older woman, so its not like that is the only thing that matters.)

Anonymous wrote:In my own DHs case it's because he wanted kids.

+1

I married a woman 11 years younger than me because I wanted kids. I was originally married to an older woman. No, my ex-wife didn't 'call me on my baloney' - I finally got fed up with hers and called her on it. I would not have remarried except for wanting kids and I dated women close to my own age for the most part while divorced. I tried dating a couple of women in their 20s, and yes, rockin' bods, yadda-yadda (plenty of hot women in my own age group), but the maturity & experience difference just made it hollow. DW is great, but sometimes I am uncomfortably aware of the huge relationship experience gap. Having had experience with women +/-20 years of my own age, I can tell you that neither sexuality (libido, confidence, skill, enjoyment) nor maturity (emotional, intellectual) are particularly correlated with a woman's age (nor for men, based on a lot of guys I know). There are plenty of women, who if there were younger men available, would happily marry younger.

Only certain kinds of men do this.

Anonymous wrote:I personally think it's a combination of sexual attraction, and she doesn't have the skills to call him on the baloney his first wife wouldn't put up with.

Yup. And the younger woman is blinded to it by his money. Poor her.