Anonymous wrote:OP--you shared you've been married for 5 years. How old are you and spouse?

I'm 35. He's 45.

Anonymous wrote:Now that so many people are having kids later, more of us have enjoyed all the spontaneous trips, weekends sleeping in etc. Loved that but wanted more. Spontaneous trips get old

We had kids in our 20s when we didn't need that much sleep. Now that we are in our mid 40's and one kid is in college and one a senior we NEED the sleep and have the money to do whatever we want whenever we want.

I can't imagine waking on a Saturday or Sunday morning before 8am Now. Little kids would exhaust me.

When I get in "a mood" about having a dog, I take care of one of my friend's dogs for a week while they vacation. That week reminds me of how much work they are! Kids are totally different--exhausting and rewarding at the same time. You never knew how big your heart can be!

OP--you shared you've been married for 5 years. How old are you and spouse?

Raising kids is a LOT of work, stress and chaos.

It is not for the faint of heart OP.

Good for you for not bringing children into the world unwanted and/or just because you feel as if it is your duty to. So many people bring kids into the world who are just not fit to be parents and it ends up with a very sad and deprived child.

Everyone should be as responsible as you two.

Spending a week with other people's children will let you experience all the work tedium and work associated with having kids without feeling all the love that comes with being a parent.

Its totally different when its your own kids. You do things for your children that you would never do with someone else's and our own kids unconditionally. I also was totally into sleeping in, travelling the world, being spontaneous, etc but having kids changed me and now my priority is them. It was never that way when I was caring for other people's kids. I found it exhausting, tedious and not particularly rewarding.

But if you don't want to have kids, Op by all means don't have them. There are already enough kids in the world whose parents shouldn't have had them.

OP enjoy your life and marriage! I love my kids but they are exhausting, and I miss spontaneous stuff...

Anonymous wrote:It's different when it's your own kids. No question it's a lot of work but also big rewards. I've got two in college now so have been through all the phases.

+1 it's definitely different when it's your kids. I would definitely not want to take care of someone else's kids for a week - but love being with my kids - best thing I ever did.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. The reasons we have really have nothing to do with the kids themselves. The kids are amazing and I love them more than anything. They bring me joy and make me laugh.
I'd give up my life for those kids, just as I would for my own children.
The reasons have to do more with what we would lose from our life. Sleeping in, spur of the moment trips to Las Vegas, long, lazy Sundays, spontaneous sex amd sleep to make a few. We are really good at being married. We realize that adding kids to that would change us completely.

LOL! You REALLY dig your sleep and relaxation. Good for you for holding close what you value. No judgment here. I think too many people have kids because they think it's expected of them, or they think it might save a marriage.

+1000

Anonymous wrote:OP here. The reasons we have really have nothing to do with the kids themselves. The kids are amazing and I love them more than anything. They bring me joy and make me laugh.
I'd give up my life for those kids, just as I would for my own children.
The reasons have to do more with what we would lose from our life. Sleeping in, spur of the moment trips to Las Vegas, long, lazy Sundays, spontaneous sex amd sleep to make a few. We are really good at being married. We realize that adding kids to that would change us completely.

LOL! You REALLY dig your sleep and relaxation. Good for you for holding close what you value. No judgment here. I think too many people have kids because they think it's expected of them, or they think it might save a marriage.

Now that so many people are having kids later, more of us have enjoyed all the spontaneous trips, weekends sleeping in etc. Loved that but wanted more. Spontaneous trips get old

OP here. The reasons we have really have nothing to do with the kids themselves. The kids are amazing and I love them more than anything. They bring me joy and make me laugh.
I'd give up my life for those kids, just as I would for my own children.
The reasons have to do more with what we would lose from our life. Sleeping in, spur of the moment trips to Las Vegas, long, lazy Sundays, spontaneous sex amd sleep to make a few. We are really good at being married. We realize that adding kids to that would change us completely.

Even though I agree with the posters who say it is different when they are your own kids, I agree with that, but OP is right nevertheless: it would be a great idea to spend a week with children before having any.

A 6 yr old? Wait til you have a toddler and preschooler. Yeah, don't procreate.